Matthew Hussey

How do we, if we've never done that before, had hard conversations, how do we learn to have them without the fear of something bad happening?

And you can communicate it better.

So you're not thinking about the presence.

I'd much rather be single than in a relationship with intermittent love where my needs are not met.

100%.

And if you're giving and giving and you don't feel like your needs are being met, then you probably need to communicate, hey, I need some time for my needs as well, or here's what I need, and make a request.

Is this something you can provide?

But you have an expectation then too.

This is something I used to do in relationships.

I used to think that everyone

in the world thought the same way as me, essentially.

That if I'm attracting this person, they must think similar to me.

They must want to give like me.

They may want to be thinking about me the way I think about them.

They may want to be generous the way I'm trying to be generous, and therefore thinking they're going to be similar with their generosity like me.

But when it wouldn't happen,

I would get frustrated and be like, huh, why aren't they giving the way that I'm giving?

So I had an expectation, right?

And this expectation left me feeling frustrated, resentful, confused, whatever it may be.

And because I lacked the ability to communicate my standards through hard conversations, the relationships never worked.