Mel Robbins

And those needs being you need nurturing.

Right.

You need to feel safe and be protected.

Right.

And you're looking for guidance.

That's right.

And if you didn't get one of those things or all of those things, and you don't even remember it because this happens in the first couple of years of your life.

when this attachment is established or not, that if you didn't get those things, what do you mean they keep getting bigger and bigger and bigger?

Unmet needs grow.

Yeah.

You know, one other thing that you write here, daughters of compromised mothers cling to hope.

Hope that the mother they have will become the mother they need.

Enduring hope creates a pathological fantasy that keeps women trapped in cycles of disappointment and grief.

Choices feel more like compulsions.

Decision-making is based on external pressures rather than internal values.

Talk to me about that hope that things are going to change and that cycle that you get into of bending over backwards, hoping that it will.

So the assignment here is share this with your best girlfriends and your partners and your sisters.

Not necessarily.

Or they don't have a mother wound.

Because they were, mom was in a different place.