Nick Martell

For our first story, the song of the summer, it's the Puerto Rico song, but it's written by AI because the creator had the perfect prompt and he protects it like a cheat code.

Uh, 2009, Miley Cyrus party in the USA.

2015, Bruno Mars, Uptown Funk Me Up.

2024, do we even have to ask?

Espresso, naturally, by Sabrina Carpenter.

Yes, we have to ask, Nick.

Not everyone's obsessed with Sabrina like you.

She's an artist.

The data, though, is already showing us early signs of the song of the summer for 2026.

Jack and I are calling it right now, besties.

It's the Puerto Rico song, and we're pushing play.

Now we're not going to play any more than that because you will never get this song out of your head.

That first stanza is living.

It's right up there.

I can't get it out of here, Jack.

And that first stanza is putting up numbers that would make Beyonce blush.

The Puerto Rico song, it's already top 10 on the iTunes charts.

5 million views with this song on TikTok, 5 million streams on Spotify.

The Savannah Bananas already have a dance routine they do at baseball games of this song.

Now, this song sounds like every 80s sitcom theme song that you couldn't get out of your head in the 80s.