Nicole Kalil

When the scale says a certain number, then I'll feel confident.

And the reality is that's just not how confidence works.

And so the con is that it's something outside of us.

Like some weird game of where's Waldo, someone or something out there has our confidence and we just need to find it, right?

But on top of that, this idea that so much of us have bought into is that confidence is related to how we look and how we feel, right?

Like we throw the word confidence around when we really mean happy or attractive or successful.

In the word confidence, the root of the word confidence is trust, right?

So confidence is when we trust ourself.

And so, yes, you know, if we get dressed to the nines, we might feel attractive and it might help us do things or show up in a way we wouldn't normally.

But unless it's impacting our trust in ourselves.

It's not confidence, it's something else.

And so I just wanted to really clarify what confidence is, that it's firm and bold trust in ourselves, what it isn't, the way we look or feeling happy all the time and identify that con of that it's,

going to come to us from some external source as opposed to the way that it's built, which is from the inside.

And how do you help people to begin trusting themselves?

Yeah.

So I always say, you know, this isn't a one size fits all, one answer works for everybody equation.

So I would start by asking you how you build trust with other people.

How do people build trust with you?

Therein typically lies the answer of how you would build trust for yourselves.

So I'll give a few examples that I think are fairly universal.