Nimisha Ladva

I wait and wait and wait and wait and wait for the school day to end.

It finally does, and it is time to go to Deborah's house and eat that stuff.

I'm really excited actually to also meet Deborah's mother because she's making all this magical stuff and she's raised these lovely children and I'm really just so excited.

So we start walking to her house and the pavement's a bit narrow so we have to take turns holding Michael's hand and we're talking about how many treats we can eat before we get into trouble and is it rude to eat two at a time and

And we finally get to the door, and I'm really excited.

And Deborah presses the doorbell, and her mom opens the door, and I look at her.

And as soon as I see her, I know that something is wrong.

So I watch her eyes, and I look to see where she is looking.

And she's looking at my hand holding Michael's.

First thing out of her mouth, Michael, why don't you go inside and wash your hands?

Wash them twice, dear.

Then she turns to Deborah.

Deborah, is this your friend you wanted to bring over for tea?

Is this Felicia?

I'm so shocked and scared I don't have the nerve to tell her that I am not Felicia.

My name is Nimisha.

Then she says to Deborah, well, dear, you really should have known better.

Why don't you tell her that she can't come inside and that she's not welcome?

Each word is poison, and I am stung.

I am stung with shame and fear and the brand new knowledge that the touch of my hand is something that has to be washed away.