Rob Henderson
speaker
881 appearances
5 recordings
4 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard 6 Aug
Rob Henderson’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
Trend
recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 4 in all, peaking in Aug 2026 with 1.
Appearances
Even small things like making appointments, following up on emails, all of those kinds of things, you know, that compounds over time having someone who's very switched on like that. And then, yeah, other traits as well. I mean... for, for relationship satisfaction. Agreeableness is one, uh, low levels of neuroticism and, um, and then, yeah, high, high intelligence is, is another.
Um, and so it's interesting that even though the similarities aren't especially high, uh, within couples, if you want a relationship to last, it's good to have sort of more rather than less of, of many of these traits.
Yeah, I mean, all of those, you know, there's sort of volatility clusters around neuroticism or low emotional stability. And it's interesting, I'm reading this, this person, it's called The Person, A New Introduction to Personality Psychology, new textbook, sort of covering the latest in that whole field.
And one of the things they point out is, you know, people who are highly neurotic, you know, high on neuroticism, they'll
often you know complain about bad things happening to them and there used to be this question of well you know are they basically um uh overstating the their own level of suffering people who are neurotic are they going through the same thing as everyone else but because of that personality trait they are exaggerating the extent of their own mistreatment
But actually, there is a bit of that going on. But additionally, when you look at objectively what happens to people at high neuroticism, they have more interpersonal conflicts, more issues with their friends, more arguments with their romantic partners, just generally more difficulty in their lives.
And so, yes, they may overstate what they're going through, but they are objectively going through worse sort of interpersonal disputes than the average person. And so, you know, if you want to avoid that, you know, you got to kind of avoid sort of the aggression, the flightiness and all those kinds of things. The openness point is interesting.
I would imagine there is research indicating that tattoos correlate with openness to experience. I would imagine the same goes for, you know, unusual piercings and those kinds of things. And so, yeah, if you, you know, there was this study about this, about promiscuity in tattoos that basically the more people if you have a tattoo, you tend to be sort of more open. What's the phrase?
Sociosexual orientation, basically more interested in promiscuous sex. Those things correlate together. And then the more tattoos you have, the more open you are to having open sex with, you know, unfamiliar people, which lines up with the other research on tattoos as well, that it's correlates with, you know, low impulse control and those kinds of things. And so, yeah, I mean, it's funny. We...
You know, I had this tweet put out a while ago with something like, you know, people put a great deal of effort into designing. The phrase is don't judge a book by its cover. And people and yet people put a great deal of effort into designing book covers. This tweet is not about book covers.
In other words, we spend so much time adorning ourselves, the way we dress, our haircuts, the piercings, the tattoos, everything else. And they are sending signals about who they are.
You know, there's there's a really great paper from a few years ago with something like personality is revealed on the weekends and the paper covered, you know, basically can cover frequency of going to the movies, going out, how many social nights you have, you know, what your bedroom looks like correlates with your personality. So many things about you reveal this.
And so, yeah, all of that, you mentioned aggression, flightiness and everything else. Yeah. but yeah, but so you want someone with, with relatively low neuroticism and then, yeah, with, with education, with, with intelligence, those things as well. That, um, what's interesting about the intelligence one is that when you ask people, um,
And these are sort of hypothetical scenarios, sort of roughly what's the ideal level of intelligence for your partner? People tend to choose around 120 IQ, which is roughly the 90th percentile of intelligence.
And so people want someone who's like obviously smart, visibly intelligent, but they don't want some super genius, maybe because of stereotypes about genius as being, you know, kind of kind of quirky or personality wise being a little off.
But when you look at the correlation coefficients, sort of how similar spouses are to one another within marriages, there is a similarity in that their IQs tend to correlate with one another. But there's still about a 10 point IQ difference between spouses on average. Um, which is smaller than it is for say, um, two siblings.
So this is all from Robert Plowman's work that, um, two siblings within a family on average tend to have 12 point IQ difference from one another, which is smaller than if you were to choose two random people in the population, the difference there would be about 17 points. And so spouses 10 points. I mean, that's even more similar than two siblings would be. Um,
But one thing I've tried to track down is whether it's more likely that the... Like in heterosexual couples, is it the man who's more likely to have the higher IQ or the woman? I think, you know, based on what we know about hypergamy and everything else, the prediction would be probably the male has higher intelligence.
I remember I posted this poll on Twitter a couple of years ago where I asked... people to imagine that they were a contestant on who wants to be a millionaire and you have to choose who's going to be your lifeline for the phone a friend option. You don't know what the question is going to be. And you can either choose who's going to pick up the phone.
You don't know what the question is going to be. They don't know what the question is going to be. You can choose your mom or your dad and something like 80% of respondents chose their dad. And so I think like, you know, I think that people probably have this intuition that within couples, men have, you know, a bit more sort of varied knowledge and those kinds of things.
Showing 821–840 of 881 · page 42 of 45
← Previous
Next →