Sam Sanders

Because had there been, he would have had to talk to you first before this total switch up.

But it's romantic.

It's not the logistics.

It's not the, like, I feel like, are you having to talk about money?

Oh, go ahead.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, and not to bash anyone in poly relationships, most non-poly relationships, they don't have these conversations either.

I have dated guys who have made more money than me or less money than me and I've been on both sides of the equation and we've never had that dialogue in the times when it has come up.

It's kind of been an argument with tears because one of us is like, I'm broke, I can't do this.

Yeah, and so I think that...

I'm really intrigued.

What is it about the poly nature of your relationship that is part of this problem?

And it seems as if this writer is implying that they feel or maybe they're noticing that he's paying for the other partner, just not for this one.

And if that's the case, I think you really should have a conversation about how the money is working there because it's not just money anymore.

It's like emotional.

It is signaling something about your relationship.

I think that there's a way to bring it up

that is not accusatory, that is not forcing an ultimatum.

You can just say the next time there's a hang that will involve spending money, just say very casually and quickly, I'm trying to spend less money these days.