Scott MacGregor
speaker
92 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard Apr 2025
Scott MacGregor’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
99% of people that connect with me either don't send me a message, or if they send me a message, it's a terrible message. Or if I connect with them, regardless of whether they do one or the other, they immediately start pitching me on something. That is the worst way you could possibly build a relationship.
So that's kind of one of my anecdotal, you know, pieces of evidence that I don't think most people are really good at building relationships and friendships. There's so many things that I could talk about when it comes to this subject, because I'm so passionate about it. I even think of the word friend differently.
Most people will not call somebody a friend unless they're ready to have a pajama party with them. This is my definition of a friend. If I know you and you know me, and we like each other, we're friends. Now that doesn't mean we're BFFs, but we're friends.
So as soon as you put somebody in your mind, they're your friend, you start to treat things differently and things are no longer transactional and things are more about them than they are about you. So I think just refining your definition of what a friend is. I mean, I felt like you and I were friends very early on, like first conversation. I knew you. You knew me. I like you. You liked me.
And then, you know, so we went from probably. A situation where if somebody said, do you know Heather? I would say, yeah, I know Heather. To now, if somebody says, do you know Heather? I'm like, do I know Heather? I freaking love Heather Monahan. So it changes. There's a continuum of friendships. But I think having the mindset of viewing people as your friend changes the way you approach people.
Was it NYU?
A hundred percent. And then you showed up for me consistently. You know, when I talk about friendship with people, I always use you as an example because you are somebody who shows up at the most inopportune times. And whether it's right before a TED Talk to come to New York for a book launch party or whatever the case may be.
My timing in asking you to do anything is always horrendous, but you always say yes, and you just show up for people. And that's so much of building really strong relationships is just showing up and knowing that You're going to be there. I remember years ago, my wife, Meg, who you know, who's going through a little bit of a situation.
And I sent you a text and literally I barely hit send and you called me. So you just demonstrate all the time what a true friend means. And it's just true friendships are an absolute blessing.
I mean, I try to show up as often as possible, but I think showing up doesn't have to be really dramatic. Showing up is, you know, showing up and supporting people on social media. You know, showing up could be celebrating them and their achievements. So I love it when, you know, somebody knocks it out of the park because they just...
wrote a great book or did a great TED talk or accomplished a milestone event, like I want to be the one bragging for them. Even something as simple as an introduction, like when I introduce two people to each other and one of the keys to introductions is they have to be mutually beneficial. When you make mutually beneficial introductions, It's a golden opportunity to be that person's hype person.
So I'm not going to say, Heather, meet Bob. Bob, meet Heather. I'm going to say, Heather, meet Bob. And then I'm going to tell you why Bob is amazing. And then I'm going to tell Bob, hey, Bob, meet Heather. And then I'm going to tell Bob why you're amazing. So it's just a great opportunity that a lot of people just... They miss those opportunities to celebrate the people that care for them.
So showing up doesn't have to mean jumping on a plane and flying cross country. It could be something as simple as that.
It's huge. So I'm a big fan of handwritten notes and I'm a big fan of doing video birthday wishes and just random stuff. I think one of the concepts that I think a lot about is I always want to be one of one. So let's just take birthdays, for example. I guarantee that you get.
a gazillion LinkedIn happy birthdays and you probably get, you know, a whole bunch of text and you get a whole bunch of this. But the number of video happy birthdays that you get is probably a very small number. So I think in anything that you do, you always want to think like, how can I be one of one? How can I show up where I'm the only person
that's doing this and sometimes it's not one thing but it's the accumulation of multiple things that you do that you become the only person in the world who's doing this for that person and when you do that when you're one of one you stand out i mean just think of it from a social media standpoint If I like a post of yours, I'm one of several thousand people that liked it.
If I comment, I'm now one of maybe a couple hundred. If I share it, now I'm part of just a very, very small number. So you just have to always be thinking of that concept. Like, how can I show up for this person so that I'm one of one and that I stand out and that they know that I care about them?
I do a couple different things. So one is I use my phone as my CRM. So all of the things that are important to me, I have in my phone. So significant others, kids, pets, addresses, cell phone numbers, birthdays, anniversaries, hobbies. It's all on my phone. The reason why it's in my phone and it's not in Salesforce is I always have my phone.
And if I'm on a Zoom call like this, I can go on my phone, which is right here, and I can look up and I can say, you know, hey, I hope Dylan had a great basketball practice today. you know, you got an opportunity to do that. So part of it is maintaining those relationships is I have all the data, all the important things in one spot that happens to be my phone.
And then with high impact relationships, I have a method, I have a strategy to maintain those. I call it my who's your Oprah list. So it's my list of people who are the most impactful and have the most access because I truly believe that the more access you have, the more opportunity you have to do good things in the world. And I use Oprah as the example.
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