Sonja Lyubomirsky
speaker
1,409 appearances
3 recordings
3 series
first heard Feb 2026
last heard 25 Jun
Sonja Lyubomirsky’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 3 in all, peaking in Jun 2026 with 1.
Appearances
But even the bigger impacts are with deeper conversations.
And one of my friends, Nick Epley, who's a professor at University of Chicago, has done some beautiful studies showing that, for example, people think like if they ask deep questions to another person that you'll be perceived as sort of nosy or prying.
Yeah.
And yet we actually, on average, we want to be asked questions, right, about our inner life.
Like we want to be seen.
We want to be heard.
So have that deeper conversations.
Maybe don't go too deep too fast, right?
Pacing is really important.
You have to read the room.
I sometimes wish that like there were emotional intelligence classes in every high school and every college, you know, because that's hard to learn.
It takes years to learn.
But yeah, have conversations that are deeper than usual.
Yeah.
Sure, sure.
Well, to start with, actually, I would start with the other direction.
I would start with showing curiosity in the other person and really listening to them, you know.
So, and that's curiosity is really hard to fake and really listening to them like you're going to be quizzed on it, right?
Not just listening because you're waiting for your turn to speak.
Ask them questions, you know, about their, we all, again, we, you know, like a lot of people will tell you all the details of their day, you know, and they ran this errand and they did this and it can be boring, but you know, you could, it shows you people really want you to know about their inner life, about what's happening with them.
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