Stephan Speaks

Because a lot of people they meet someone they really like them but they can sense something's missing or something's off. But the problem with people is that they're being told if you have this great person you can't pass that up, you see. If you don't have a very glaring reason that society deems as valid oh, well then you're being stupid or you're being ridiculous.

Because a lot of people they meet someone they really like them but they can sense something's missing or something's off. But the problem with people is that they're being told if you have this great person you can't pass that up, you see. If you don't have a very glaring reason that society deems as valid oh, well then you're being stupid or you're being ridiculous.

It's like no, you have to trust your spirit, trust your intuition. Something is telling you and it's probably something that you can see but maybe you can't articulate it or again, you don't feel like it's valid enough. But I can tell you from my position those little things is what turns into a big thing later and destroys the whole relationship.

It's like no, you have to trust your spirit, trust your intuition. Something is telling you and it's probably something that you can see but maybe you can't articulate it or again, you don't feel like it's valid enough. But I can tell you from my position those little things is what turns into a big thing later and destroys the whole relationship.

But I'll say this, so you know we said understand the differences, understand yourself and the third one would be healing. I have to always mention that because I believe the number one issue that people are facing is a lack of healing.

But I'll say this, so you know we said understand the differences, understand yourself and the third one would be healing. I have to always mention that because I believe the number one issue that people are facing is a lack of healing.

And that plays into figuring yourself out because again, you... If you are operating out of a place of fear or shame or you've been told you weren't good enough or something about you wasn't good even though that wasn't the case well, that's going to make you struggle with embracing that.

And that plays into figuring yourself out because again, you... If you are operating out of a place of fear or shame or you've been told you weren't good enough or something about you wasn't good even though that wasn't the case well, that's going to make you struggle with embracing that.

Right, and if you aren't healed and you're carrying all these negative perceptions of relationships, love, because a lot of people with their words say I want love, but in reality they're scared of it, all right. They fear being that vulnerable. So, they actually subconsciously choose partners who don't make them too vulnerable, but they're good enough to be with so to speak.

Right, and if you aren't healed and you're carrying all these negative perceptions of relationships, love, because a lot of people with their words say I want love, but in reality they're scared of it, all right. They fear being that vulnerable. So, they actually subconsciously choose partners who don't make them too vulnerable, but they're good enough to be with so to speak.

which is what I call the safe choice. Some people hear me say the safe choice and they misunderstand what I'm saying. I'm not saying safe as in this person creates a place of safety for you. I'm saying this person doesn't take you to the true level of love, true vulnerability.

which is what I call the safe choice. Some people hear me say the safe choice and they misunderstand what I'm saying. I'm not saying safe as in this person creates a place of safety for you. I'm saying this person doesn't take you to the true level of love, true vulnerability.

You're able to have emotional control and manage the situation but because of that you're never choosing someone you're really into and you can never be what they really need. And at some point, it's going to fall all apart. But it all goes back to healing.

You're able to have emotional control and manage the situation but because of that you're never choosing someone you're really into and you can never be what they really need. And at some point, it's going to fall all apart. But it all goes back to healing.

We've got to heal and not just heal from the romantic relationships, from childhood trauma, from everything, because it all contributes to our struggle to connect with other individuals.

We've got to heal and not just heal from the romantic relationships, from childhood trauma, from everything, because it all contributes to our struggle to connect with other individuals.

Yes, but... So, okay, I guess the reason why I'm hesitating in the way I answer that is when you say men today because I would argue it's probably always been like that. I just think that there's more ambitious women now and so there is this disconnect there. And I think that the disconnect though isn't simply based off of men not wanting an ambitious woman.

Yes, but... So, okay, I guess the reason why I'm hesitating in the way I answer that is when you say men today because I would argue it's probably always been like that. I just think that there's more ambitious women now and so there is this disconnect there. And I think that the disconnect though isn't simply based off of men not wanting an ambitious woman.

I think we got to go a lot deeper than that.

I think we got to go a lot deeper than that.