Stephanie R. Yates-Anyabwile

speaker

1,222 appearances 107 recordings 4 series first heard Jun 2022 last heard 14 Sep

Stephanie R. Yates-Anyabwile’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

Trend

recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 83 in all, peaking in Aug 2026 with 26.

Appearances

newest first · ▶ plays the moment

TED Talks Daily · Your relationship expectations could be holding you back | Stephanie R. Yates-Anyabwile (re-release) · 4 Oct 2025 podcast

Our metric of success is based on what we've seen everyone else do.

Imagine how you would honestly feel if you heard the following about another couple.

OK, I said honestly, OK?

I heard they don't even sleep in the same bed anymore.

They claim they never want to get married.

I don't think they ever plan to live together.

Would you think to yourself, it sounds like they have some serious issues?

If we're honest, a lot of us would.

And it's not because we're not open-minded, but we've been taught that these are warning signs for a relationship in trouble.

And while they can be for a lot of people, that is not always the case.

Relationship experts have found that one of the primary obstacles that couples face are their own expectations.

When we compare ourselves to societal norms, we can develop a sense of resentment toward our partner, as well as a sense of shame for how we ourselves are coming up short.

Now, before we really get into this, I have to say that some of us have to reckon with the fact that we may be with the wrong person.

And that will be clear if your deepest desire is that your partner change fundamental aspects of who they are.

You really want them to be a different person.

But if you're confident that you're with the right person,

and you just still feel frustrated and dissatisfied, we may find that rejecting everything we've known about good relationships is the key to actually having one.

I work with couples every day, and I help them through relational crises.

I remember I was working with an engaged couple for about a year, and when they first came to me, they said, we're 95 percent good, we just want to address the five percent.

And I hear something to this effect often when I first meet a couple.

Showing 701–720 of 1,222 · page 36 of 62