Timm Woods
speaker
394 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Feb 2025
last heard Feb 2025
Timm Woods’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
Great to see you. Thanks for having me back. It's good to be back. It's awesome.
This is my ranger garb. You can kind of think of a ranger as, I would say, like a medieval shredder a little bit.
And as we pointed out, we did in our last session for the first time both get to the end of the adventure for that day, and no one had gotten killed. So I don't know if that will hold up today or not, but I'm very excited.
We... We did end things on a very exciting cliffhanger last time. We did decide that we would do the extended version of the Forge of Fury adventure where we completed level one. But now we are discovering there is more to the adventure. I don't expect anybody to remember anything from last time. It's been six months. I had to rewatch the episode.
So I will give us some highlights of what happened last time. I first want to say that Norm the Barbarian, just a reminder, did go to the bar and chug the boot in record time. That was a big part of the beginning of last time and won over the hearts and souls of all of the dwarves in the town of Blassingdale by setting a new record on chugging. So big celebrity in town for sure.
Absolutely.
Absolutely. Greg with two Gs, the paladin, I did want to remind you that you did get some good information and potions and stuff when you went to the local temple. You also did get a husband as well. You did put a wedding ring on the high priest.
It was completely accidental. He was like, oops, we are married now, and he is now escorting you on your adventures. I promise no shit like that will happen again. No, definitely not. And it's not only the high priest, who I'm naming Horngrim. Horngrim, your husband, is with you. As well as your moth. Don't forget, you have a big moth that you ride on. And I never asked a very important question.
That moth gets a name at some point.
Do you have a suggestion? I was going to say maybe Shredder? Shredder 5.
Shredder's a good moth name, I would say.
That sounds fucking sick.
Why do I think Shredder had a mini... Okay, never mind. Little Shredder is going to be your noted moth, 100%. I wanted to make sure we remembered that, Wayne, we did meet your family, most notably your stepsister, who was revealed to be, in fact, not your biological sister, but your stepsister, but only after she slept with the final boss of our last adventure, the ogre great elf.
Exactly. You said that'll happen. That'll happen. I've seen a lot of footage of that.
That could certainly be Shredette. Let me just make a quick adjustment here. Shredette was what I picked. That's so weird. That's so weird, Shredette. Thank God it was because I would have been pissed if she wasn't a Shredette. Absolutely.
Yes. My grandpa would be rolling over in his grave. Won't share the same values that we have in their giant underground tank vehicle. And so, uh, We may run into your family again at some point, Wayne, in this adventure. Hippo Maximus, I wanted to remind you that you had acquired a valuable guide who helped lead us to the mountain.
That was Big Don the Eagle, who I am sorry to say did unfortunately die in their first round of combat after they rolled a one and immediately got one shot by an orc. I also want to extend an apology. I watched the footage. I feel like I was gloating a little bit and having too much fun with that. But it was an epic way for Big Don the Eagle to go down. And who knows?
You might be able to acquire some new animal companions in your adventure today. And just a reminder, you still have the ability to shapeshift into different animal forms. Your most important druid ability.
And of course, Erlik, lest we forget, it was you who delivered the final fireball that killed off the remaining orcs that we were fighting and revealed that the key had been picked up by like the old orc chieftain who had not wanted to give it to the big dumb ogre who is currently sleeping with the stepsister.
You had caught, thanks to some inspiration from Wayne the Key, we went over, we opened up the vault that held the valuable magic weapons and gold, including the mighty axe of the dwarven blacksmith Durgedon, only to find the vault was completely empty.
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