Tom Holland

The mummies come out.

Great.

So Miguel de Estete, one of the conquistadors, has a lovely description of bringing out the mummies.

They've all got diadems on their heads.

They're put on thrones.

There were women who ministered to them with as much respect as if they'd been alive.

And actually, my favorite detail, so the mummies are brought out, and next to each mummy, there's a little kind of altar with, Miguel de Estete says, on which were his fingernails, hair, teeth, and other things that had been removed after death.

Imagine sitting next to Queen Victoria's teeth.

What are the other things?

Fingernails, hair, teeth.

What does that leave?

What are the other things?

And then here's the fun detail.

And I quote, I think this is from Miguel de Estete again.

There were so many people in the parties and both men and women were such heavy drinkers that all day two wide drains ran with urine as abundantly as a flowing spring.

Gorgeous.

So just imagine the scene.

You're there as a Spaniard.

There's a load of mummies being paraded around with their fingernails, teeth and other things.

And meanwhile, people are constantly relieving themselves into these massive overflowing drains of urine.