Tyler Perry
speaker
187 appearances
2 recordings
2 series
first heard Jan 2025
last heard Feb 2025
Tyler Perry’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
But because of what I went through and because of how much I understand the pain of that, I would never inflict that on anybody. So it put me in this great position to help as many people as I could safely hit this next level in their lives. Right. Yes. So all of that is incredibly important to me.
Yeah. And that happens. I had a friend who had been sexually abused and he had hundreds of partners. Yeah. Well, at the same time, he was abandoned by his mother. So you could give him 10,000 females and it wouldn't fulfill what he was looking for. Yeah. And he and I finally sat down, had some real deep conversations about what's going on.
I even hired a private detective to try to find the mother that abandoned him. Oh. So that he could talk to her. I was thinking that hopefully that would help him.
Yeah. There are people who go to these incredible extremes. You can go that way where everything is sex. And then you go the other way where, for me, I didn't want to be thought of as sexy. Being tall was a problem because when people would see me, they'd think, oh, this tall black guy, the stereotype or whatever that is.
So carrying all of that and trying to walk through and work all of that out was a journey for sure.
There was one woman who I was completely in love with. I was in my early 30s at the time because I wasn't very experienced. I felt less than. Inadequate. Inadequate. And that was something that made me shy further away and back into myself of going, OK, I don't want to be judged based on my lack of experience because of what I've been through.
Yeah. So at 54, this happened. Past summer, I've been thinking about it for a while. It's like, OK, Tyler, you've worked this hard. You've got this beautiful kid. You've had this amazing life. What happens when you're not working? Why aren't you happy when you're not working? Because the work became the drug and the adrenaline.
So to take that moment and stop the work and say, OK, let's go and look inside and see what's happening and see the full effect. This program I did was so fantastic. Before you go in, there are thousands of questions that you answer. So they have a clinical profile of who you are mentally walking in the door. For me to walk in and be confirmed in who I thought I was, was so freeing.
To have all of these therapists, I think it was nine that I saw in total, because it's a very intensive thing for seven days, 10 hours a day. And then you sit in the room and all the therapists talk about you and you listen.
Oh, wow. And to hear them talking and affirming the good person that I know that I am and the issues and the way to work through them. Was very freeing for me. This one woman I love, she would say to me every day I walk in because when you go through these profiles, it's like, do you drink? I was like, I have drink on occasion. Have you ever done any drugs?
And I know I tried this pot when I was 40. Didn't really like it. I have a gummy every now and then. But if I get too weird, I don't like feeling out of control. But they were fascinated because I'm not an addict. That's shocking to me. You were like an 80 percent chance of being an addict. And that's exactly what they were saying to me. And there were these group sessions.
I'm going, I'm not going to be in these group sessions, man. I'm Tyler Perry. I don't know about this. And she said to me, there have been people who've come here who were famous, who did not do the sessions and came back to do the group sessions.
So I was in the group with these wonderful people who had shit that they were dealing with to sit in and hear their stories and made me find the commonality. There was a through line for all of us. And I think that for all of humanity, man. As much as I'm excited to be here talking to you, my hope is that by sharing this, somebody hears something that goes, maybe that's what I'm dealing with.
And we grew up in a time where you could not talk about it. No. Because if you said anything, you're gay. And being gay at that time was a horrible, taboo thing. I'm so glad we're at a place now where people can just be themselves. Yes.
There was a kid recently, I don't know a lot of younger singers and performers, but he was singing on stage and I saw him talking about his sexuality, trying to figure it out. And my heart went out to him because he's so young. And what I wanted to scream was, look into the arousal template, figure out what happened, walk it through so that you're clear in a sense of this is what happened.
And also, there's so much shame. You have to chase the shame down of what that feels like. And that's the thing that freed me just to look at it like I am ashamed of the why. And also understanding that was not my fault. I did not deserve that. They gave that to me and it wasn't mine to carry.
Here's the thing that I've been trying to work through the most, as long as I have been dealing with what they both gave me to carry, it has denied me the ability to love freely, openly, And be in a relationship that is healthy and whole for a very long period of time. Yeah. I have another friend on a guy's trip in Jackson.
We're sitting around talking and he's talking about how when he was six, his older brothers were making him have sex with these women. And he's laughing and he's joking about it. He's laughing at everybody around the table. They're all making jokes. And I'm quiet. And I'm just like, guys, I'm sorry. I got to challenge you on this. He's like, no, no, no, no.
So when we got to a moment where we could talk in private, he broke.
Because I had him look at his child. I was like, is that OK for your six year old? And then it's like, whoa, because you realize you've been judging the child that you are through the lens of your adult life. It's so misleading. For sure.
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