Zach Morris
speaker
3,776 appearances
15 recordings
1 series
first heard Sep 2017
last heard Jul 2025
Zach Morris’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And so I think that's really powerful.
And it avoids...
invalidating each other's experiences right i think that's if we don't provide that opportunity for for space or for for co-regulating and we jump right into to reasoning that's a really quick way for someone to to think their experience is being invalidated right
Yeah, so that's kind of the relating piece, right?
That's how I think of that is.
And I've seen this sort of described as these three R's in a sense, right?
Which is we regulate, then we relate, and then we reason.
And reason sort of at the end.
And so I think right now we're kind of talking about that cusp of moving through like relating to ultimately getting to reasoning.
And so what I would say is,
In the relating process where I'm trying to acknowledge your experience and I'm trying to sort of validate it, I try to be very wary of not slipping into reasoning.
Because when we start talking about it, now all of a sudden we are on this cognitive level.
We've sort of moved through just the physiological reaction.
And so now because we're talking about it and because I'm working with my adult brain, I quickly want to move from relating into reasoning.
But I think in the delicacy that we move from regulating into relating, that needs to be similar for how we move from relating to reasoning.
And so in that relating state, it's really a deep, active listening practice, right?
And really trying to pull out as much information from the individual that we're trying to hear from as we can.
So this is where I really encourage people to sort of
Those things that you want to challenge that person on, those perspectives you want to share, all of those things to sort of fuel that conversation to go further and really inspire that reflection, put all that on the back burner.
Because that's what we're going to do when we get to reasoning.
Showing 441–460 of 3,776 · page 23 of 189
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