907. The pressure you put on yourself is the pressure your child will inherit with Dr. Shefali
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What is the main theme of the episode and how does parental pressure affect children?
Fathers grew up with the message boys don't cry, boys have to be strong. Right now it's changing, but in most generations, even today, that's the internalized script. So now we're trying to change it to boys can cry, but the fathers are terribly
uncomfortable. My husband grew up hearing that. His parents are Jamaican and they just have a very masculine, dominant culture of like we don't cry.
They actually are more sensitive. Because their left and right brain is not so connected. So they're having a harder time putting words to their feelings. They can't even hear themselves because they can't connect the word to the feeling. So with your son, when he cries, he doesn't really even know why he's crying and he cannot put words to feelings. So don't ask him to, but you can put words to his feelings. And he will immediately calm down. And then we are done. adult women disparage our men and shame our men and go you don't even know how to talk. It's really not fair to them because they were never taught.
Hello everyone, welcome to the Almost 30 podcast. It's Lindsay. I'm so happy you're here. I'm grateful and I have An episode for you. Okay. I am excited to bring back. Dr. Shafali to the Almost 30 podcast. We've had her on before. It was a virtual interview. This time she came in person to have an in-depth conversation about raising conscious daughters and raising conscious sons. She has two menu books out now: Raising Conscious Daughters and Raising Conscious Sons. And Like all of her books, I believe, these are a critical guide for us parents as we raise children in this day and age. So this conversation is, I think, very dynamic in the sense that Dr. Shafali um has a daughter who is in her early twenties. I have a son who is a toddler.
We talk about that spectrum, everything in between related to really empowering our children, empowering ourselves as parents, um, to really step into what we know to be the most the highest version. of ourselves to really um call forward the true authentic expression of children and also just noting like the world in which we live in and kind of what we're up against as far as technology goes, peer pressure, uh societal pressures, cultural pressures. Um it's really it's not for the faint of heart, but these books I No, Will support you in navigating this. So if you don't know Dr. Shafali. Um, if you didn't watch her on Oprah like I did back in the day at 4 p.m. weekdays, um, she is a New York Times best-selling author, world-renowned therapist.
She is a wisdom teacher, international speaker, and founder of conscious parenting. Uh, and again, she has so many books, but these latest books I think just must-haves. So, in this conversation, obviously, we are going to talk about both raising boys and girls. And it's very different. You know, I think we can kind of read general parenting books and there could be so much that applies, but Raising boys and raising girls is different because they are different. Um, the big idea around raising conscious girls is that girls are adapting to impossible cultural expectations. Um And the problem that we encounter as parents is that. We are dysregulated. We have maybe a lack of self-healing in this realm, conditional worth, comparison culture.
There's body stuff that we have as parents, body surveillance, um, emotional suppression. And so the goal ultimately is to really empower our girls to feel fully, to trust their Intuition, set boundaries, tolerate discomfort, understand their inner power, and develop their inner authority. And we talk about raising conscious boys, so You know, the big idea is that we are not raising difficult boys. We are raising boys in a misaligned culture. There's so many things interesting about what Dr. Shivali brought up, but we see a lot of boys completely immersed in a digital world. All that to say, there's so much that we touch on here. I won't I won't go into it any further. I think we should jump into this conversation with Dr.
Shivali. The n her new books are raising conscious daughters and raising conscious sons.
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Chapters
6 chapters
1
What is the main theme of the episode and how does parental pressure affect children?
0:00–5:00
2
What are Dr. Shefali’s new books *Raising Conscious Sons* and *Raising Conscious Daughters* about?
5:00–10:31
3
How is today’s generation of young adults coping with anxiety, cost‑of‑living pressures, and living at home?
10:31–23:33
4
Why is performance‑based parenting no longer effective in the modern world?
23:33–32:52
5
How can parents help children develop inner authority, self‑trust, and emotional resilience?
32:52–46:05
6
Why do boys struggle to put words to their feelings compared to girls?
46:05–1:00:23
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Almost 30
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