Dax and Monica talk to Armcherries! In today's episode, Armcherries tell us about a time they escaped a cult.Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch new content on YouTube or listen to Armchair Expert early and ad-free by joining Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify. Start your free trial by visiting wondery.com/links/armchair-expert-with-dax-shepard/ now.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Chapter 1: What is Armchair Anonymous: Cults II about?
Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad-free right now. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Mon Padman.
Hi. You're trying it out. It doesn't sound right on you.
Not when you do first and last name. Mon Padman? That sounds like Monsoor Padman, which is pretty cool.
Yeah, that is cool.
Maybe it is good. Monty Padman, that sounds crazy too. These nicknames when they're in conjunction with your full name maybe don't work.
Okay, that's fine.
Yeah.
Like D.D. Shepherd.
Ooh, D.D. Shepherd. That sounds fun. Today is part two of one of our favorite prompts ever. Escaping a cult.
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Chapter 2: How do Dax and Monica introduce the episode?
Yes, it's so good to meet you guys.
Oh, wonderful to meet you. You're my first Taj. Is this a family name?
My real name is Amy. Oh, okay. I have a very common last name. And about 10 years ago, I decided, you know, there's too many in the world. So I'm just going to pick a different name. Oh, I love this.
You rebranded.
My brother and I both have done this.
And did the people around you immediately accept it? Or did you have people that were still calling you Cassius Clay? No.
Well, I live in Portland, Oregon, where everybody changes their name.
Oh, that's a great place to change your name.
But my mom, who at the time was still living in New Jersey, she has passed since then, she freaked out because she was a therapist and the only person that she knew who had changed their name was a schizophrenic patient.
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Chapter 3: What is Taj's experience with a cult?
We would go perform in front of large audiences. We would do like Christmas performances. The CD that I sent the song and the pictures, we did box fourth cantata. We did very like intricate, difficult music and got pretty good because it's literally everything we do. It's pretty insane and comical to me to listen to because it's like a whole different person.
So how I left, I wasn't the highest status, but I was doing all right. But I was very bought in. And then one day, my dad sat my whole family down in the living room. There's seven of us kids, and I'm the oldest. And I was 19 at the time, and he said, we're leaving the church. Total shock to us. We all just started sobbing. We were devastated. It's our whole life.
We don't even know people outside the church. So it's like the worst thing that could happen to us. And I remember he said we could stay for like another month until some performance happened with music. So we had to go back to school and my friends were crying in the grocery store, crying till they'd throw up. Like it's the worst thing that could happen.
We went through the last little bit and we left. But the day that he told me we were leaving, I called someone who was like a mentor, a woman who is higher up as far as women can be. And she said to me, how much do you love the church? Do you love the church enough to leave your family? And I remember that I thought, yes. And I said, maybe, I don't know.
The next day she took back her offer and said, I talked to my husband and he said, I need to stay out of it because she had mentioned maybe me coming and living with them. And she was like, nevermind, you stay with your family. And I was devastated by that. And I found out later that my dad had gone and threatened the men of the church and said, don't fuck with my family.
Don't try to come after my kids.
When your dad told you you were all leaving, did he give an explanation as to why?
I don't remember a lot of that day, but I know that he had gone to the men of the church and said, I don't believe that we're doing things biblically here. I think there's some real issues and we should make some changes. And they said, we don't care. You need to either do what we're doing or get out.
And then when we left the church, to me, it felt a lot like if you've moved to a different country that was English speaking, like, yeah, we speak the same language, but I don't really get your humor, your culture. Yeah. I don't really understand what you're saying. I was really shocked by boys just being even mildly flirtatious. It was very alarming.
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