Chapter 1: What are the common themes of spring break disaster stories?
welcome welcome welcome to armchair anonymous i'm dan shepherd and i'm joined by lily padman hi today is crazy spring break disaster stories what a right place for a disaster there's so much alcohol consumption yeah you're on the road you're out of your known environment freedom for maybe the first time you have very high expectations
That's right. That's right.
It's a lethal combo. Yeah. Guess what? Things go wrong.
Please enjoy Crazy Spring Break Disasters.
Hello. Hi, is this Mary? This is Mary. What are all these fun posters behind you?
Ari Shafir signed our poster. We love to go to comedy shows, me and my boyfriend. And then out of the park, I'm from Cleveland. So it's a Cleveland Indians little kid pitching a ball. And we just got back from Vegas in December. So there's our cash out voucher. There's like nothing on it. And then that's from a brewery in Montana that says Maverick Mary.
And I insisted I had it because it was my name. These are all very personal. These ones aren't. That's Joe Dirt. Just a favorite movie.
And are you currently in Cleveland or where are you at now?
I am in Cleveland. Born and raised.
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Chapter 2: What happened during Mary’s spring break trip in 2017?
So that sobered her up really, really quick. As I'm getting on the stretcher, going into the ambulance, she's like yelling at the paramedics, please let me in. They're like, ma'am, you're in a bikini. You cannot come in here like that. So she literally grabbed anyone's clothes. I don't even know what she was wearing. I think she was wearing a Hawaiian shirt and some random shoes.
None of it belonged to her.
Since when do hospitals not allow you to come in unless you're like dressed properly?
That happened to me in that rollover accident. They don't want the liability of a second person on board, but they just don't want to take any passengers. They're not a Uber service, not insured to carry passengers. You know, I mean, I think they should. I'm just saying what I know to be the case.
So I think that they realized how scared and stressed I was. So once she had clothes, they allowed her in and I didn't even have my phone with me. Everyone's phones kept getting stolen on that spring break. So I left my phone in the room. So I'm just in the road with no phone, no nothing.
So obviously she comes to the rescue and she comes in the ambulance with me and the paramedics couldn't disclose what had happened to me. They just kept saying like, you need to stay calm. Like we're taking you to Broward County Trauma Center. So at this point I was like questioning, did I get hit by a car or did I somehow randomly faint into the middle of traffic? Like I was really confused.
Confused.
And you're in such shock, you're not feeling any pain.
No pain. I was just really scared and it immediately stabilized your neck. So I'm just laying in the stretcher like, am I going to be able to walk again? This is horrifying. So I get to the hospital. I ended up having a concussion, a cracked head, bruises on all parts of my body and 12 staples in the back of my head.
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Chapter 3: How did Mary end up in the hospital after her spring break?
It was just really strange. And he came up to me and he like put his hands like this to my face. And he was like, oh, my God, I can't believe you're alive. I thought you had died. And it turns out he was in the front seat of the Uber that hit me. And then they obviously kept on driving.
Oh, they kept driving after they hit you? Wow.
With all those witnesses.
Oh my God.
Wow.
I don't really remember how the rest of the story went, but he wanted to follow me on Instagram. So we kept in touch for a little bit post-college, but nothing ever came of it. Once I got back to Ohio, I had some time to like take everything in. And I realized that Florida is a no fault state. So that Uber driver never had to pay for anything.
But I did have to file a lawsuit, so insurance would cover my medical expenses for that day, which ended up being pretty expensive and that ambulance ride. And then the reason that silly picture that you thought you're getting trolled with, Tim Misny, he's like the most famous lawyer in Cleveland, and he's known for his eyebrow.
So if you look at that photo, it's just the eyebrow.
There's billboards throughout Cleveland of just the eyebrow.
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Chapter 4: What were the challenges faced during the Appalachian Trail hike?
Thank you. I was like, I wonder if this will count as a disaster. I'm just going to submit it and see what happens.
It's a trapping. It's a claustrophobia. It's a public nudity. It's an unauthorized evacuation of your breast from its holster.
I would even say an unauthorized evacuation of me from the slide. Yes. You're right.
I'll just get one more silver lining, which is I keep waiting for you to say the big lug came down and snapped your leg. Because think about the fact that when you were standing, what a vulnerable position you were in for knee trauma. And your boob would have still been out because it was already out. So then it would have been broken knees, maybe second boob out, maybe bottoms off.
Oh, bottoms would have. Maybe the fabric would have readjusted back over the boob.
The universe was like too much, too much, too much.
Guys, I've been a fan for a long time. So this was very thrilling for me. So thanks for letting me chat with you. I loved it.
It was really fun for us.
We're a fan of you.
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