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Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

Armchair Anonymous: Wild Card XI

16 Jan 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.25 - 19.693 Dax Shepard

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad-free right now. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepard and I'm joined by Monica Padman.

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19.833 - 20.454 Monica Padman

Hi.

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20.835 - 24.84 Dax Shepard

Today is wild card. What number in a wild card do you think this is?

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24.881 - 26.002 Monica Padman

Nine.

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26.423 - 32.512 Dax Shepard

And don't you think you went further than what you really think, right? Because you know I'm going to say it's high. Sure. Do you really think it's seven?

32.532 - 33.994 Monica Padman

No, I think it's nine.

34.014 - 35.235 Dax Shepard

You think it's nine. It's 11.

35.676 - 36.798 Monica Padman

Oh, wow.

36.818 - 40.483 Dax Shepard

Oh, my wild card. Lucky 11-11. 11.

Chapter 2: What wild story does the guest share from their past?

110.932 - 114.175 Marcos

Yes, I'm actually an hour east of South Padre Island.

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114.315 - 117.599 Dax Shepard

Where I went on vacation at one point, Christmas time. And are you a drummer?

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117.719 - 119.1 Marcos

Yes, I'm a music teacher.

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119.44 - 125.887 Dax Shepard

Wonderful. And what's great, Marcos, is wildcard. You could have murdered someone. You could have saved someone. We have no clue.

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126.167 - 144.507 Marcos

The year is about 2006. At the time, I'm 19 years old. One of the only one of my group of friends to have their own apartment. That was always the place we would all hang out. I'm hanging out with our local ska band. There was also a bunch of 18, 19-year-olds as well. They would play shows. After the show, we'd all go back to my place, hang out, have a great time.

144.627 - 148.232 Marcos

One of the main characters in this story, we're going to call him Marine Mike.

148.653 - 149.614 Dax Shepard

Oh, great name.

149.814 - 165.915 Marcos

He's fresh out of service. This is 2006, so he was all over the world. We met through an acquaintance. We're both from small towns that are really close to each other, so we became real quick good friends. After one of these gigs, we're out of my place. It's probably around midnight, 1 a.m., so you can imagine...

165.895 - 169.598 Dax Shepard

I need to know how inebriated we are. Are we smoking weed? Just drinks?

Chapter 3: How did the car accident unfold during the wild story?

284.167 - 295.414 Marcos

Me, three other guys and another girl, we run up to the man. grab him each by a limb. We start dragging him because the car's on fire. He's yelling at us about his kids. My kids are in the car.

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295.434 - 297.176 Monica Padman

Oh no, this is horrifying.

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297.196 - 305.867 Marcos

He's trying to get up to go get him. We're trying to keep him down. I look at Mike. He knows what's happening. He tells me right away, I already got the kids out of the car. You get him away from the car.

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306.047 - 309.792 Dax Shepard

He's like, I do more before 5 a.m. than most people do all day. I already got the

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309.772 - 329.648 Marcos

whole family out to my recollection he was up there directing traffic checking on the other car traffic's piling up on both ends so we dragged this man maybe about 20 feet away from the car The fire's only getting bigger. Let's pull him further away. We actually get him onto the main road, which is probably about 30, 40 feet away. I'm looking at Mike.

329.688 - 345.21 Marcos

He's running back and forth, making sure everything's going clear. A lot of traffic, no ambulance, no fire trucks, no cops have shown up yet. We're all there leaning on this guy, trying to keep him calm, letting him know your kids are okay. They're already out of the car. He's got blood all over his face, all over his shirt. I look to my right.

345.371 - 358.092 Marcos

With all the traffic lights and everything that's happening, all those car lights, I I see five women running up to us in club gear, heels, skirts, everything. They're just yelling at us. We're nurses. We work in the ER. Oh, my God.

358.112 - 360.616 Dax Shepard

This is great. Sexy nurses.

361.618 - 379.842 Marcos

We can take care of it from here. We got it. Like, don't worry about it. We got it because we're just a bunch of kids. We're all 18, 19 year olds. Let's let them do their thing. We stand up and I'm starting to think cops are going to show up. They're going to ask questions. We've been doing our own thing. And as soon as I start thinking about that, I hear like a click click coming from the car.

Chapter 4: What challenges did the narrator face during the rescue?

487.904 - 514.452 Marcos

played smart so i talked to mike about it i feel like in the time it happened he said he blacked out but now it's kind of come back to him and he said he can clearly remember getting into the car to pull the man out he saw the dashboard melting we all remember his hat had been singed his trucks were all black and the kids were fine so the next morning when mike was leaving he saw the cops out there doing an investigation so he pulled over to ask him he's like hey i did your job last night for you give me some info

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514.432 - 528.847 Marcos

Well, this happened. He's like, yeah, I was the one that pulled them out. He's like, oh, do you want to leave a report? He's like, no, absolutely not. We found out everybody came out of it just fine. The other car looked like it had just had damage, but that Cadillac, I got in it really bad.

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529.509 - 530.351 Monica Padman

Scary.

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530.371 - 531.293 Toto Wolff

Saved the day.

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532.117 - 537.926 Marcos

I've always been very curious about it, but that was almost 20 years ago. So it's kind of hard to look back on reports and find out what might have happened.

538.167 - 540.851 Dax Shepard

What kind of town is it? Is there like military close?

540.991 - 557.043 Marcos

No, it's kind of like a port town. We're in between South Padre and Laredo. Really big on culture. We're very proud of ourselves. 956. Everybody that moves out of here to bigger cities will tell you the one thing they miss the most is the food. Austin's okay. San Antonio's better. We're probably the best. Wow.

557.063 - 559.509 Dax Shepard

No kidding. In what? Tex-Mex? Is that what we're calling it?

559.529 - 572.02 Marcos

Tex-Mex, tacos, barbacoa, tamales. Oh, keep talking. In fact, Mike actually lives in Colorado now. And that's what he was telling me. He's like, that's the one thing I miss the most. Yeah.

Chapter 5: What unexpected events occurred after the accident?

660.751 - 663.074 Unknown

You know how there's only a few copies of us? Exactly.

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663.094 - 669.883 Monica Padman

I was just about to say. There's cookie cutters. And then they change little tiny things. Just like a couple tinies.

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669.943 - 671.625 Dax Shepard

That's right. For deniability.

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673.715 - 675.601 Jane

Hello. Hi, how are you?

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675.902 - 677.287 Dax Shepard

Good. Can you hear us, Jane?

677.448 - 678.872 Jane

Yeah, I can hear you. Can you hear me?

679.374 - 685.094 Dax Shepard

Wonderfully. We're already charmed by your accent. Where are you?

685.134 - 687.999 Jane

I'm in the UK. I'm from England. Oh, wonderful.

688.119 - 690.202 Dax Shepard

So what time is it there right now? Seven?

Chapter 6: How did the narrator's family react to the situation?

873.951 - 875.593 Monica Padman

And so I think we trick ourselves.

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875.693 - 885.242 Dax Shepard

But there is this also added layer of you're embarrassed. Of course. It'd be best if no one ever knew. And it's like, we think we're so unlovable that if we were to do something like that, like we got to hide that.

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885.783 - 892.169 Jane

Yeah. I held that thought until I stood up and I couldn't put my left leg on the ground.

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909.087 - 932.04 Jane

And I had what we call trainers, you call sneakers. So I took the sneaker off and my foot was swelling. I was on my own in the house. My husband was out doing last minute chores before the wedding. And my daughter was due any minute to wrap up final arrangements. So I started to cry. Yeah. And I went down the stairs on my bottom like a baby. Yeah.

932.02 - 941.797 Jane

Got to the bottom of the stairs, switched onto my knees, crawled down the hallway on my knees, got to the stairs. We have a cupboard under the stairs and dragged some crutches out.

942.238 - 943.46 Unknown

Oh, that's convenient.

943.6 - 948.809 Jane

Because I had knee surgery. What if they were in the attic again and you put the ladder back?

948.829 - 950.552 Dax Shepard

I just got to get back up there to get those crutches.

Chapter 7: What lessons were learned from the wild experience?

1200.539 - 1222.353 Jane

The National Health Service is free for accident and emergency. It's perfect. The issue is... The system has an infinite demand and a finite resource and it can't cope. So people are readily used to spending hours waiting for treatment as an emergency. If you're in a road traffic accident, it's different. You know, if it's life threatening, it's different.

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1222.493 - 1227.741 Jane

The challenge comes if you need a hip replacement or a knee replacement and you're on a waiting list.

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1227.721 - 1229.283 Dax Shepard

How long might you wait?

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1229.343 - 1235.733 Jane

Could be six months. It could be a year. It could be three years. There's a big backlog in the system because of COVID.

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1235.753 - 1236.133 Dax Shepard

Oh, wow.

1236.294 - 1239.939 Jane

Every emergency I've ever had, having my daughter, no complaints at all.

1240.36 - 1245.748 Dax Shepard

Okay, great. And the free part's really nice. You just left the hospital and that was it. You waved goodbye, right?

1245.788 - 1256.023 Jane

Yeah, we pay from our salaries. We have taxes and something called national insurance and that contributes to the cost, but it doesn't cover all of it. But yeah, it does the best it can under the circumstances. And that day it saved me.

1256.003 - 1258.567 Dax Shepard

Yeah. Okay. Wow.

Chapter 8: How does the story conclude and what reflections are shared?

1394.177 - 1401.57 Dani

My favorite boy's name is Roman. Roman. That's been my favorite boy's name forever. And that was going to be my boy's name. And then, of course, I had three daughters.

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1401.55 - 1411.566 Dax Shepard

But that's what happened to us, and we just said, fuck it. We were like, yeah, we're going to have a boy. He's going to be named Lincoln. Uh-oh, it's a girl. Okay, still going to be named Lincoln. So Roman as a girl could have been radical.

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1411.586 - 1415.992 Dani

Definitely could have been, but I couldn't get my husband on board, so there we go.

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1416.173 - 1417.314 Dax Shepard

Husbands, who needs them?

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1417.334 - 1417.935 Dani

I'll send him a letter.

1419.217 - 1420.359 Dax Shepard

For sure. So, Dani, where are you?

1420.559 - 1422.983 Dani

I am in Germany. Oh, my goodness.

1423.003 - 1424.946 Dax Shepard

This is our second international call in a row.

1425.086 - 1425.587 Dani

Oh, cool.

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