Begin Again Moments: The Midlife Pivot
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What challenges did Ruby Wax face after losing her BBC show?
Television is my allergy.
Yes.
Yeah. It's my allergy. If I get near that, the cortisol starts filling up. It was interesting because television was your savior. Yeah. And now it's something else. What happened? I think you mature. Yeah. Your brain gets wiser. Like I'm lucky. There's an expression that says at a certain point you can turn into wine or vinegar. Wow. after about 50. Oh, I love that. Yeah, it's good, isn't it? And so I really got interested in meditation, mindfulness. And I think that means you're really interested in digging down. And that's really my interest. I don't want to have, I don't do small talk. I mean, you know, I'll be funny, you know, especially if I know that's called for. But my real interest is when you speak below the radar.
Yes.
Yeah. And this podcast is called Begin Again. And I'm always thinking about how can people change something in their life that will enable them to, on their deathbed, go, I really fucking had a go.
I tried. I did everything I wanted to try.
Exactly. I tried. I tried. But you did. I mean, you are. You're doing.
Well, I did. I did. Yeah, I was kicked out of TV, more or less. I could have kicked my way back in.
How did Ruby Wax reinvent herself in midlife?
So what do you mean by that? Well, after Ruby Meets. Yeah, I was doing like, there was a great show, Boys With Toys, where we raced to Russia. So that was my last show. I wouldn't say that was a dud. And then Alan Yentob, who's dead, took over my slot. Well, my Sunday night slot. I can't fight that. And they said, oh, your shows don't sell anymore. Yeah, bullshit. Yeah. But the point is I'm really grateful because that means you have to find another career. And boy, did I try a few things in my little skirt. I went around trying to sell bags that I designed, you know, the ultimate bag woman. I tried everything. You know, I tried to be a coach because I knew coaches made $500 instead of shrink. You know, and I had got my degree in being a shrink.
Can we just talk about that? Just tell us what degree you got. I got a degree in psychotherapy. Yeah. And I had to do from regions. I had to do 400 hours. I did 200. Mega. Yeah. I did 200. So good. Well, it was interesting.
We need to be proud of that. What an achievement. And how old were you at this point when you did your degree?
You become a shrink when you're about a good one. Yeah. Late 40s. Yeah. You were late 40s. No, I was in my 50s, yeah. But it starts then. Around menopause, people start getting interested in therapy, the wild shores of menopause. Suddenly they're interested in somebody else's mind because theirs has taken a holiday.
So you're talking about this trying to get out of bed, you know, the snooze button, which is something that all of us can relate to. And would you say that... The five-second theory was the first sort of big one that you came up with. Oh, yes.
Because this is mega. Well, I didn't think this was mega at all. So what happened is I literally, my life was falling apart. And I was watching television one night and a rocket ship went off the television screen just as I was saying, all right, tomorrow morning, Mel, it's a new you. You gotta find a job, you gotta be nice to Chris, you gotta open those bills, and by God, woman, you have got to get out of bed when that alarm rings."
What led Mel Robbins to discover the 5 Second Rule?
And this rocket ship launched across the television screen, and I was like, that's it. That's a sign from God. I'm going to rocket out of bed tomorrow. I'm going to move so fast, I'm not going to be in that bed when that anxiety strikes. Now, I was four Manhattans in, so it was probably the bourbon that gave me the idea because it sounds kind of stupid. But the next morning is when I saw this universal habit. I didn't call it that then, but I saw this thing that I'd never seen before. And once I explain it, you'll never look at life the same way again. There's a five-second window that defines your whole life. It is a moment of hesitation. It is a moment where you go from thinking about what you need to do, from knowing what you need to do, to then hesitating and thinking about it.
It's unmistakable. And once you see this, and I explain it with the alarm clock, you'll see it every morning.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What challenges did Ruby Wax face after losing her BBC show?
0:00–1:22
2
How did Ruby Wax reinvent herself in midlife?
1:22–3:35
3
What led Mel Robbins to discover the 5 Second Rule?
3:35–5:24
4
How can the 5 Second Rule help overcome procrastination?
5:24–9:03
5
What is the significance of mindfulness in personal reinvention?
9:03–10:30
Speakers
3 identifiedMore from Begin Again with Davina McCall
Jake Humphrey on Grief, The Trauma Of Childhood Bullying & His Mission To Save Young Men
Begin Again Moments: Growing Up With A Narcissistic Parent
Liz Houghton: Losing My 20-Year-Old Son & How To Keep Living When Your World Ends
Begin Again Moments: Hitting Rock Bottom And What Comes Next
Caitlin Moran: “I Thought My Brain Had Broken” Becoming Hopeful After A Life Of Anxiety
Begin Again Moments: What Makes a Successful Marriage?