Chapter 1: What shows does Bert have coming up?
What's up, everybody? I've got some shows coming up. February 8th in New Orleans at the UNO Lakefront Arena for the big game. That's Saturday night, not Sunday night. Me, Nikki Glaser, Tony Hinchcliffe, and Adam Ray as Dr. Phil, and huge surprise guests. Then in Vegas in March, 28th and 29th at Resorts World Theater. And finally, oh, Canada. I'm coming to you.
Winnipeg, Halifax, Calgary, and Vancouver. It's me, Whitney Cummings, Miss Pat, and Derek Stroop. Go to purrpurrpurr.com for all of them. There are similar characteristics in Vicodin that you'll get when you take a bite of a pepper.
Hey! Something's burning. Something's burning. Something's burning.
Are we making cocktails?
I would love one.
Yeah. What do you drink?
I mean, I love a Jack and Dot, but I'll drink your vodka.
That's a glaring endorsement. I drink a Jack and Dot, but I'll try that vodka.
Just pour some of that shit, whatever it is.
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Chapter 2: What is chicken souse?
You'll fall asleep on a fucking arm and it'll be like, it'll be a while. Hours. Hours.
They can fuck you up.
Holy shit. That's one of my fears. Me and my cousin Andrew talk about it all the time. That and Bell's Palsy. Every time I'm getting ready for a big show, I go, what if I wake up with Bell's Palsy?
Yeah.
and like we've already paid for everything and I'm just gonna be like.
And your body's just like, I'll let you know when we're back.
Yeah, yeah.
There's no like, there's no like take medicine, anything. Yo, this food's so good bro, I'm sorry I haven't checked out of Conversations and shit.
No, this is, I'm telling you man, the flavor's hard to describe. It's so good.
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Chapter 3: How do you make grits?
Chapter 4: What is the significance of Southern accents?
We got this? We just had this?
We're in an Airbnb in Nashville. I'm here with Travis and Ernest. We are making souse today.
Souse!
And I don't know where anything fucking is. A plate.
What is sauce?
And tongs. Sauce is, so I told you, I'm an Instagram guy.
Sauce?
Sauce.
Is that North Carolina?
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