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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. Hi, everyone. Andrea here. I have some exciting news to share. ABC has turned Betrayal Weekly into an eight-episode anthology, which means each episode features one of your favorite Betrayal Weekly stories. You'll get to see the people involved, hear from people who have never spoken before, and actually see where the story took place.
We are so proud and excited to share it with you all. It's called Betrayal, Secrets, and Lies, and you can watch it every Sunday at 10 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, 9 p.m. Central. Please check it out. Throughout the years we've worked on this show, our team has talked to hundreds of people who've been through some kind of betrayal.
Some of their stories are about abuse, left undiscovered or unchecked for years. Others are about financial crimes or secret identities. But across all of these stories, there are similarities. Like in the way people talk about the aftermath and the moment everything changed.
Our life blew up on April 11th. April 2022 is when D-Day happened. And everything just blew up. All of this blew up our life, our kids' lives, our community.
He completely ruined my family.
For so many people, a betrayal is an ending, a death of the life they knew. I often get asked if it's depressing, working on stories like this day in, day out. And the truth is, a lot of the time, it's the opposite. Because as much as these are stories about the moment of destruction, they're also about what happens after that moment. How people get up the next day.
How they rebuild after the smoke clears. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say a bomb dropped on Saskia's life. And yet today, seven years after her discovery, she's still standing.
I think it would surprise him to see how much stronger I've gotten even since his attempt to totally destroy me. I was not gonna be just a dispensable person, someone that you can use and abuse and then discard. His focus was on my weaknesses and he didn't realize how strong I am.
I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal Season 5, Episode 10, Waking Up. Before we talk about where Saskia is today, there's something I want to share. It's a bit of a left turn, but it has a lot to do with why I do this work and why I felt drawn to Saskia's story. In college, I was raped. At the time, I was going through a really bad depression.
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Chapter 2: What significant event changed Saskia's life seven years ago?
bravery takes different forms. While it is undoubtedly brave to come forward, sometimes bravery is just getting up the next morning and living your life.
This was something I needed to hear, and I imagine some listeners out there need to hear it too. Bravery isn't always about pursuing criminal action. I had to understand that after what happened to me, keeping my grades up, graduating, and just getting on with my life was the bravest version of myself. And today, that form of bravery is what Saskia is practicing too.
The days of pursuing justice are now behind her.
These days, for Saskia, bravery looks like getting out of bed and starting her day. Feeding her pets, going to work, taking a walk.
After the discovery, I wasn't able to do anything. I wasn't able to work. I was constantly on hyper alert. It really felt like this is it and that there's no light at the end of the tunnel.
Nowadays, she's not only back to a normal routine, she's creating that routine for herself for the first time in her adult life.
Seven years ago, I was like a baby, just starting out, just learning to crawl. And learning to crawl was learning what I would choose to do on my own. I had never really been single until a few years ago. And just learning when I'm by myself, what do I choose to do? What do I choose to eat? What do I choose to watch? And to then incorporate that into who I am.
For me to get my agency back and be able to do what is good for me is where my power lies now.
Before everything happened, everyone thought Saskia needed someone like Mike to save her.
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Chapter 3: How did Saskia's past experiences shape her current journey?
That's what I'm finding. And you know, Saskia, some people don't have the capacity. It takes a lot to slow down and feel.
Yeah, it's been really hard. A few years. I'm proud of myself for taking the time to be by myself and come to some realizations, but it's a scary thing to do at 47 years old. I wish that it would have happened a lot earlier for me so I could have avoided some of these consequences.
I don't know how many clients I have that are like 40 or 50 or 55 who say the same thing, like, I wish I could have done this sooner. I remember asking my mentor once when I got out of a really unhealthy relationship, I said, did I need to go through this pretty traumatic relationship to have this healing process occur? Like, was there another path?
Sometimes we're just not ready to go there until things get bad enough or we need a wake-up call. Yeah, right.
We have no choice but to slow down or stop and deal with things.
In slowing down, Saskia's not only facing these emotions coming up through the podcast or sitting with her trauma from Mike. She's going back further to her childhood to understand why she gravitated towards someone like Mike and to try to break that pattern going forward. Remember, Saskia grew up as the youngest of four.
Her father struggled with mental illness, and her mom was busy keeping the family afloat. It had a real impact on her. She always had a lot of friends, but on the inside... I still felt so alone and like a freak.
In school, I remember crying in the bathrooms and not really knowing why. Looking back, I was really struggling with depression and anxiety. That's a big part of why she turned to alcohol. I remember the first time getting drunk and how good it felt. It helped me cope with a lot of things that I hadn't dealt with yet were under the surface.
Stuff from my childhood. Doesn't it make sense? That's part of the human desire is we go towards what feels good, what releases chemicals, what feels a sense of belonging. And you weren't getting any of that at home.
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