7: The Resurrection of Jake
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What is the content warning for this episode?
Blink is intended for mature audiences as it discusses topics that can be upsetting, such as drug use, sexual assault and emotional and physical violence. Content warnings for each episode are included in the show notes. Resources for drug addiction and domestic abuse can be found in the show notes and on our website blinkthepodcast.com. The testimonies and opinions expressed by guests of the show are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of myself or affiliates of this podcast. Vielen Dank für Ihre Aufmerksamkeit und danke für das Zuhören von Blink. Every time I sit down with Jake, his stories come to life in vivid detail. He doesn't just recount what happened, he paints the full picture.
How does Jake describe his hospital experience?
The agony of his injuries, the feel of the room around him, the voices that broke through the sterile hum of hospital machines. He tells me that this obsession with detail comes from years of being unheard, and then, when he could speak again, years of being misunderstood.
Jake's life is anything but ordinary. It's brutal, unpredictable and sometimes it hits him like a fork to the nuts.
I start becoming unparalyzed and I'm like making baby sounds and there's a video that I put on YouTube of me eating chocolate pudding with a spoon. I'm dying laughing because I thought it was so funny that I just couldn't do it and pudding was getting everywhere, cracking up. Anyway, I'm kind of... I was about to say master to the pudding, but that's a stretch.
What challenges did Jake face in recovery?
But, you know, they were like, let's try a fork. And at this juncture, I could only barely hold the fork. But I've successfully got a bite on a fork from a plate that was in my lap. So I could only eat off my lap. And they were like, what do you like to eat? I'm new to eating too, and I'm like, blueberries are good for my brain. They brought in all these blueberries for me, it was great. And I had a little cup of blueberries balanced on my lap. And I'm taking this fork, and I just can't get them on the fork. And it's so frustrating, so I did one of these hot tosses. And it missed the cup and it went directly in my balls. Like, like, my balls were now on the fork, kinda. And I'm like, ahhh! And these nurses come in and they're like, what's wrong? And I'm like crying.
And they're like, you know, talking to me like, baby, did you hurt yourself? Did you hurt yourself anymore? Und sie meinte, du musst uns zeigen, du musst uns zeigen.
Und ich so, nein.
Und sie öffnet die Wäsche und sagt, lass mich den Wunsch-Nurse anrufen. Und ich so, oh Gott, nächstes Mal weiß ich, dass ich acht Leute in meinem Raum habe, die mich verrückt schauen. Und ich will nicht schauen. Dann gab es einen Befehl für eine Kuppe und Sicherheitsglas. Das war das erste Mal in der Geschichte des Hospitals, dass sie medizinisch verurteilt wurden, eine Baseballkuppe für einen Patienten zu kaufen.
It's now 2019, two years after Jake was diagnosed with acute toxic progressive leukoencephalopathy. Jake was determined to regain his mobility, his speech, his life. And luckily, the team at Western Massachusetts Hospital was just as determined to make it happen.
Yes. Oh yes. I'd even be like, can I come in the gym and use a bike when you're busy? Like, help me transfer and that's all I need, I'll be quiet. Like, I was eager. That motivation, which I must have said before, a lot of it had to do with my wife. Getting through it and getting to the point where I could live with her, that was on my mind 24-7.
Jake still hopes to rekindle things with his wife, but deep down, he knows he can't count on her. If he's going to move forward, he'll have to rely on himself.
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Chapters
6 chapters
1
What is the content warning for this episode?
0:28–1:33
2
How does Jake describe his hospital experience?
1:33–3:33
3
What challenges did Jake face in recovery?
3:33–7:28
4
How did Jake reconnect with his family?
7:28–16:51
5
What role did Family Constellations play in Jake's life?
16:51–20:16
6
How did Jake's family react to his reappearance?
20:16–37:22