8: Dude, Where’s my Sperm?
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What sensitive topics are discussed in this episode?
Blink is intended for mature audiences as it discusses topics that can be upsetting, such as drug use, sexual assault, and emotional and physical violence. And in this particular episode, there's discussion around rape, consent, and pregnancy loss. Content warnings for each episode are included in the show notes. Resources for drug addiction and domestic abuse can be found in the show notes and on our website, blinkthepodcast.com. The testimonies and opinions expressed by guests of the show are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of myself or affiliates of this podcast. we've all been left on a massive cliffhanger. Jake had three requests in his divorce.
So here's a quick recap.
Jake was diagnosed with acute toxic progressive leukoencephalopathy in May of 2017 at Massachusetts General Hospital, MGH. He was later transferred to Fairlawn Rehabilitation Hospital, then to a nursing home, Parsons Hill, where he took a fall and then was sent to UMass Memorial briefly and then back to MGH, which is where all of this began. He spent time shuffling back and forth from MGH to Spalding Rehabilitation Hospital, which was quite necessary to receive the adequate care needed for his extreme condition. And frankly, his should have been deadly complications. And then he moved into hospice where he did not die. He was brought back to MGH.
What happened to Jake during his hospital stays?
And this is where Dr. Levinson noticed movement in Jake's wrist, discovering that Jake was locked in. And this is also the place where Jake was first able to communicate by eye blink. He was then transferred to Spalding Rehabilitation Hospital, this time for his first inpatient stay. And then Ellen bought a house and moved him to Western Massachusetts Hospital. But then his main doctor back at MGH had him transferred back to MGH temporarily until settling at Tewksbury State Hospital, where he lived while receiving outpatient care at Spalding. Okay, long story short, Jake was constantly shuffled between hospitals. And this certainly made it much more difficult for family to try to track him down.
And I want to say once more, this episode contains sensitive content, including discussions of consent, marital rape, and Jake's growing acceptance of the reality of what he endured. We're starting with Jake's second stay at MGH. This was after Parsons Hill and before he moved to hospice. Jake is already in this pseudo-coma, locked in, and doctors are questioning whether he has any meaningful consciousness. It's the winter of 2017.
Every little thing was extremely painful, frustrating, itchy, scratchy, sensitive. Yes, fully aware of all pain. Quality of life was not good. All I really wanted to do is be able to say a few words to the people I loved, and that would have been good enough, and I was kind of ready.
Jake was preparing to die, hearing a doctor tell his wife it was time. Something that he'd hear over and over again over the coming months.
What led to the legal battle over Jake's sperm?
Mrs. Handel, your husband will not make it past Christmas. Now I can't see, I can just hear people and I have a sense of where people are around my bed in the room. And I hear, okay, I think I would like to get a sample. You know, it's funny, all these other medical professionals at first had no idea what she was talking about. I knew exactly what she was talking about. And they were like, ma'am, what do you mean? She's like, well, we always wanted kids before he dies. I want to get a sample so one day I can have his kids. And they're like, oh, no, no, no, you can't do that. And we'll tell you why. Two reasons. Number one, he's non-responsive. He's in a coma, and we don't know if that's what he would want. You can't do that.
And number two, the simple act might kill him in his condition right now.
Jake's body was highly sensitive and doing something like this could trigger another autonomic storm. Or worse.
And she just goes, how dare you tell me what I will or will not do with my fucking husband. If you don't like it or you don't want to watch, get the fuck out. I feel her going to town on me. Right in front of all of them, I assume. I mean, from what I felt, she was definitely jerking me off. Now, was it under the blankets, or was it wide out in the open? I don't know. I'm not certain.
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Chapters
6 chapters
1
What sensitive topics are discussed in this episode?
0:00–2:50
2
What happened to Jake during his hospital stays?
2:50–4:43
3
What led to the legal battle over Jake's sperm?
4:43–8:18
4
How did Jake's wife approach the situation?
8:18–16:48
5
What are the implications of consent in marriage?
16:48–24:35
6
How has society's understanding of consent evolved?
24:35–30:20