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Chapter 1: What insights does Police Officer James provide about his role?
They're a specialist guest Telling us things we don't know about Telling us things we have never done Things we have never seen And will never do They're a specialist guest Telling us things we don't know about Telling us things we have never done Things we have never seen And will never do They're a specialist guest Telling us things we don't know
Telling us things we have never done Things we have never seen Hi. How are you?
How are you? Well, we've spoken for an hour. Yeah, I know. We've got a policeman on today. Yeah. I liked what you said earlier to me about it. Go on. I don't know anything about being a policeman.
I don't know what a policeman is.
Well, it's skewed, isn't it? Because we see lots of police dramas and things.
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Chapter 2: How do police officers deal with the public during interactions?
There's lots of different departments.
This is already fascinating. Are there lots of departments? I just said. Yeah, there will be. There'll be drugs. There'll be drugs.
Drugs. Graffiti.
No, well, actually, they might be lumped together. Some of them. Usually are. Misdemeanors. No, I know more than this. Surely we know more than this.
Chapter 3: What does a typical day look like for a police officer?
I don't know anything. When I think of a policeman, I think of a man with a truncheon walking down the street.
Have you seen a truncheon recently? They look more like army officers. Policemen dress more like army now, don't they? What's a policeman? A policeman is someone who, I don't know. They're never walking about. They're always in cars.
Right, well, that could be Lewis Hamilton.
No, that wasn't what a policeman is. I'm saying you said Bobby on the beat. They're in cars now. Is there a Bobby on the beat? No, I think they're stationed somewhere and they're in a car and they go, we're 10 minutes from anyone in our section.
Chapter 4: How do police officers conduct investigations on drug gangs?
Do you hate this?
I hate that people are listening to this going, what? This must be such a turn off to some people.
Or utterly relatable.
One of the two.
We will never know. No, I don't know. We all know what a policeman is. We just don't know the details. Everyone knows what a policeman is. No one knows the details. That's what we're... So that's what makes this episode potentially super.
Gold dust. What do you think they do on a Monday morning? You're a policeman this tomorrow.
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Chapter 5: What challenges do police officers face during stakeouts?
Well, there's lots of levels. Are we talking like brand new? I don't know.
Where's our guest? I need to learn.
Well, no, you had a question that I was going to answer. What's the lowest of the low? Well, don't say it like that. The newest recruit. The newest of the new. I don't know, a police person.
police officer so they're just doing all the odds and sods so what i mean well this is what we're i'm trying to work out monday morning it's monday morning when we record this what is a bob a bobby doing who's new and they're going okay today there's a oh this is oh wow hi james hello hello how are you hi are you in the station i am in the station apologies for having a weird name to it Sarah's.
You're on Sarah's. Yeah.
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Chapter 6: How do police officers handle stressful situations?
Sorry, can I just say that? You're in uniform.
Yes.
Bloody hell. I just sat up. I nearly, do you know what I nearly said? I don't know why. I nearly said David used to smoke weed. I don't know why that.
Oh, fuck.
That's all right. I can do a previous report. It's fine. Fucking hell, Joe. I'm really joking.
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Chapter 7: What kind of training do police officers undergo?
I can't do that.
All right.
Don't worry. You've had this up your sleeve, haven't you? I'm a grass.
That was where my brain went. You disgusting snitch. That's where my brain went as soon as I saw your uniform. That's terrible.
I'm really embarrassed that my brain thinks like that. Well, I'd like to let you know, James, I was being on the peloton all morning trying to keep fit and doing my best.
As a good citizen.
Flipping hell. I've gone all blushy.
So have I. Look how red I am.
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Chapter 8: How do police officers balance their personal and professional lives?
I'm so embarrassed. That's all.
Sorry, James. How are you? Yeah, I'm very well, thank you. Yeah, perfect. I feel like you're looking down your nose at me, James.
One of us is a wrong one. Can you say, there's stuff you can't say, which Petra reminded me, but can you say where in the country you are? Can you say that?
Yeah, so I'm East London. So I'm right in the sort of East part of London, sort of central-ish, around that bit.
Is your station really busy, basically?
The station I'm in at the moment is really busy. My station I parade out of, so each officer in certain different groups and certain different teams will parade out of different stations.
Parade out of? What does that mean? Sorry, leave.
So with each team and unit, we'll call it parade. So it'll be like response team, the ones who whip around fast in the blue lights, they'll parade out of the station I'm in at the moment. And they'll have a big briefing room told what's going on, what they need to look at. And then they'll be told who they're in the car with, get in the car, shoot off out.
That's already ahead of what we know. Because we were saying we don't know anything. No one does, I think. We all know what police officer is, but we don't know what you do day to day. So that's how, is that how the day starts? You, you go into a big room and get told what you're doing.
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