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Chapter 1: What humorous quip opens the episode?
it's email time now that's who the time is right now we're opening up all of the old emails now i wonder who has emailed in now and craig and stew have emailed in now and sally too has emailed in now and john and bob Oh, oh, we're gonna read em now Oh, oh, we're gonna read em now
Oh, happy Friday.
Happy Friday, everybody.
God, it's the best day of the week, isn't it?
Yeah, I fucking love it.
Oh, the weekend's going to be fucking great, isn't it? Is it?
Yeah, and it's going to start here with this quip from Paul Wheeler. Our pod should be like this.
God, I got swept up in the goodwill. God, I'm sorry.
Crunch, crunch, fellas. I wanted to tell you both about a time a few years back when I was working recruitment and trying to tie in a new client who was playing hardball. and not signing a contract with our agency.
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Chapter 2: How do the hosts react to a listener's snake-catching email?
A colleague told me that this client used to go for a lunchtime swim at the local swimming bar, so I came up with a cunning plan to accidentally bump into him there, thereby giving him... Leave him alone! ...thereby giving myself some common ground, which might actually lead him to like me and give us his business.
After a couple of aborted attempts, as he didn't show up, I struck lucky on the third visit. I didn't acknowledge him, but I noted where his locker was so I could grab the one next to him and bump into it. Fucking hell, this is horrible. Then gently mentioned that we'd spoken before and finally going for the kill. I'm going for a swim.
As he was showering, I sat down on the bench next to his locker and started to get changed back into my work clothes. I had managed to drop my glasses out of my bag and under my seat and had to kneel down and reach under to pick them up. As I clambered back out and knelt up, turning back round, he had returned from the shower and was drying his hair.
I somehow managed to end up with my face and his somewhat formidable penis, eye to eyes, so to speak, and about a foot and a half from each other. Ooh, you wouldn't want that on the end of your nose for a wart. Was for some reason the best thing to say.
And it came out my mouth. I think that's superb.
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Chapter 3: What personal story does a host share about a recruitment experience?
He just looked at me, shook his head a little. No, not that one. And we continued to get dressed side by side in complete, excruciating silence. We didn't get a contract. You wouldn't want that on the end of your nose for a walk.
Do you know what? I can see myself saying it. Really?
Yeah.
I wouldn't be happy.
Long-winded.
Yeah, you could have gone, I was in the shower, in the swimming pool, turning around, big willy in front of me.
Oh, no, I thought the quip was long-winded.
Oh, I thought the story was. Yeah.
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Chapter 4: What prostate health issues are discussed in listener emails?
You wouldn't want that. What was that again? Let's dissect it. Yeah. What was it again?
What? The quip. Oh, you wouldn't want that on the end of your nose for a wart. Yeah, you're right. Yeah.
Thank you for your email.
general feedback too long and his and the email this is from brandon edwards sent two weeks ago good day fellow chatterboxes though i'd send an email thought i'd send an email as i listened to an episode where david had mentioned wanted to talk to a real life snake catcher What? Did you? Well, as luck would have it, this is indeed my occupation.
Chapter 5: What suggestions are made for a True Crime podcast segment?
However, with a twist. I live in Australia. I moved from shitty blighty ten years ago due to the fact the skies were mostly the colour of fresh sewage. I listen to you guys every single day for hours. I know, absolutely pathetic. I think it's mainly due to the fact I have no friends and many consider me to be a little blunt. Well, fuck the cunts.
Anyway, if you'd like me to call on this number, if you'd like to call me on this number, should we call him?
Yeah, absolutely. Go for it. Now? Yeah. Hold on. Well, I was told you did this. You had a nervous breakdown.
Chapter 6: How is living in a camper van portrayed in listener emails?
It was the fish man at the end of your road.
Oh, my phone. I haven't got my phone.
Oh, that's Andy.
Well, I can go and get it, but... Yes. Have you not got yours?
No, not on me. You don't want to ring him? No.
Don't you? You're actually holding it. Yeah. Oh, we've got a real... Oh, fuck. Will it go a bit weird?
Hold on.
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Chapter 7: What is the pub joke shared at the end of the episode?
Really? God, I'm actually going... It's expensive as well, isn't it, Australia?
What's that? What's that call? Oh, I just know I'm going to want to cut him off if I get scared. Do you know what? You'll need the appropriate dining coat. Oh, I'm sorry.
you know what it'd be one of these things they build the build up and then then this will happen it'd be me going hi yeah no yeah oh yeah but i want to see that yeah but i've i'll be in hell or similarly what are we talking about what is he a snake catch yeah i don't know why we i don't similarly chuck me the contact and i'll call you just remember the time difference Oh, yeah, where is he?
Oh, it's probably at 11 o'clock at night. What time is it in... I enjoy the show, but not enough to be woken up at one o'clock.
Oh, all right. It's seven o'clock in Melbourne. It's all right.
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Chapter 8: What closing thoughts do the hosts express for the weekend?
What, evening? Yeah. Why don't you ring him? Well, what... I explained why, because I'll be... All right, well, let's move on.
Thank you for your email. Christian O'Connell would have.
It's OK. Yeah, I'm sure there's thousands of people. I'm just not one of them. Well, shall we...
Does it feel a bit punky? Yeah, just ringing up live on the show. Suddenly thought, am I being a punk?
Well, you're not doing anything.
You're forcing me to do it. It's a win-win for you. It all feels a bit dangerous radio from the 90s.
Early Moyles.
It does a bit.
We loved Early Moyles.
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