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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
hello this is joe uh welcome to the monday vault uh in this episode james our editor is just putting whatever old depths out randomly uh don't know if it's gonna be any good or shit um but that's the chances you take some of them from the past for a bit anyway cheers
All right. All right. I'm shattered. Got loads of energy. Fucking hell, go on then. I'll just listen. You've been doing that for two weeks. I know. Why are you tired?
Well, I don't know.
Oh, you are. You're a little bit nasty. That's the question. I'm full of beans and annoying. Is this enough? Are we done enough? No, did you get a bad night's sleep?
I don't know.
A little bit. I think I did. Oh, God, I do sound grumpy. Yeah, really grumpy. It's what Petra has to deal with. I just realised, I just feel like I'm working up in the bed with you.
Can I put my arm over you and snuggle? What?
Can I put my arm over you and snuggle? Not after you've spoken to me like that. I'm sorry, can I snuggle? Oh, go on then. I know we've got loads to do you never want to do any of the chores and they're not chores it's just things you do in life oh my god don't call them chores it's called being an adult sorry Your breath smells like shit. Petra would say, you're very garlicky.
Did I eat garlic?
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Chapter 2: How do the hosts express their feelings about their roles?
I framed you. It's how she feels. What's that? I framed people. I sort of feel it sometimes. Same with me and Naomi. I just definitely feel like a drainer. Drain myself. Yeah, you can sense yourself doing it. God, what was I talking about yesterday in the kitchen about work and that? It was so boring. Was she just getting on with stuff while you sort of drained off? Yeah.
I was getting on with stuff. I was trying not to listen. Will we change?
I don't think I can change now.
I don't think I'm changing. I don't think I could become a doer. I'm not a doer. I joke about it. I've sort of turned the fact I don't do anything. You are. Look what you've done with this podcast. You don't do this. You just tell her, I have to do all the background work. Yeah, that's true. Actually, it's true, isn't it? Next week, if I did nothing, I'd love to see what happens with the podcast.
If it makes you feel any better, it weighs heavy on me. Yeah, okay. That's the experiment next week. You bring nothing. I bring nothing. I'll just, I'll edit it. We can edit it as well if you want. That's terrifying. You can edit it. You can contact the guests. I'm happy to do that. I feel that's in my... Like Rosie and Joe. Oh, okay, I'll do them. God, it suddenly dawned on me.
Fucking hell, what do you do? Because what do you do? I was doing a lot. Yeah. What do you do? To my point... What's that?
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Chapter 3: What challenges do the hosts face in their podcasting roles?
That's to my point. I'm not a doer. Oh, is it like a habit, a habitual thing where other people get stuff done so you sort of play this role? I think I'm naturally...
Like if people around you, you know, like if someone naturally around you will do it, I think, yeah, you sort of, and you're weaker at that.
Yeah, that does happen. I think it becomes a bit chill. You're weaker at emailing guests. Yes, exactly. So we should just move on. We should brush over that. It suddenly dawned on me, it's like, fucking hell. I know, I've been waiting for this. I'm doing your fucking chores like Petra. I know, but as I say, maybe I can sweet talk you once a full night. No, your breath stinks of garlic.
I haven't even had garlic. Well, it stinks of garlic. Go and wash your teeth. Do you want a coffee? I wonder what that is. I think, you know, it will get done. So you don't bother doing it. You know, the podcast will get done. So you don't bother doing anything.
Well, so many elements of my life about this. Okay. Well, I've had this conversation with Petra and obviously it drives out the wall, but when we went together, like I still didn't do stuff and I would constantly like nearly lose my flat and stuff. Because I would just leave things too long. And obviously, anyone in your life who is more scared of that, or less lazy, basically.
It's really not fair, is it? No, not on the rest of us. No. Sorry, David and Petra. You can have a little WhatsApp group with Petra. I'm not in. Are we going to? Can't that be? Do you know what I was thinking about yesterday? About people... You know everyone gossips about everyone. Oh, yeah, all the WhatsApp groups in the world. Yeah. That you're not part of.
Yeah, and just how much... And this is all of us. And it sort of freaked me out and scared me.
And you mustn't think like this, people. I was like, all the times it... you, one, me, Petra, everyone, has been gossiped about.
Oh, yeah. And then when I think about it, I get a bit freaked out.
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Chapter 4: How do the hosts manage their responsibilities outside the podcast?
I had the thought yesterday about, yeah, complete, gotcha. I know, but obviously it happens all the time, but how hurt you'd be if you heard it. I was like, oh, no, but that's obviously happening. That's probably happening right, but not now, because it's quarter past five. It will be somewhere. Just like yourself.
I really couldn't handle it. I was like, oh, no.
Will you think of all the things you've said about... No, that's what... I was doing one of those yesterday. Yeah.
And then I just thought, oh, no, someone's doing this about me. Of course they're doing this about me.
I just have to bury it down. Otherwise, you just... Horrible, isn't it? Really horrible. I think I'm the only person in the world who doesn't deserve it.
I think. I think. Well, I don't think I should be spoken about in that way. It's not like I was speaking about someone. No. That was adding bits that weren't entirely true.
Horrible, though, isn't it? Yeah, it's really horrible. Oh, my God. But you can't think about it, otherwise you can't function, I don't think. No, and I think you protect yourself. Yeah. But we're horrible, aren't we? What? Me and you? Well, yeah, us as well. I include us. The way we gossip. Yeah. I hope you're proud of yourself, everyone. I'll tell you what I was going to show you.
because you don't check the emails or do anything, because I have to do it to keep this fucking thing running. Do you know what? This is definitely changing. It suddenly dawned on me. I am not your wife. Don't say that as a negative. Petra listens to this. Petra, I am so on your side. I check these emails. I go through all the emails. Jeepers creepers.
Okay, so this made me feel... You'll love this. You will love this, I think.
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Chapter 5: What insights are shared about communication in relationships?
Okay, is it about Andy Fools and Horses? No. No. Well, firstly, someone's been on Record Breakers and wants to come on. Listen to this. This is from Pete. Hello, David and Joe. Loving your pod. Please never stop. Thought I'd send you a track I wrote called She, with my band smiling in slow motion. Oh, God almighty, wow. I'm absolutely taken by this. I wrote it about my ex who also follows you.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God. What's his name? It might be nice to use you guys as a platform to show off. I'm too embarrassed to show her directly. How fucking good. Right, wait, wait, wait. Are we going to say his name and her name? Don't know her name. Okay, what's his name? Because she picked... Pete, what? Should we give his surname or not? Does he want that to go out?
Well, he's just written Pete. I'm not going to give his surname.
Right, okay. Look, this is smiling in slow motion.
Yeah, it's creepy, isn't it? Yeah, it's ridiculous. No one smiles in slow motion. So this is Pete. So this is Pete. He wrote about his ex. He's too embarrassed to play it to her. Oh, Pete. Do you know what? This is a big moment for Pete. Wait, wait. I want to know what he's, like, is he friends with them now? Does he want to back? Is he trying to hurt them? They're still on good terms. Oh, okay.
Okay. God, I'm certainly quite emotional then. So he wants to tell us something.
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Chapter 6: How do the hosts handle disagreements during the episode?
Yeah. Fucking hell. I think the nation, well, our listeners are probably on tenterhooks now.
I think what I'll do is I'll play the song now to us, but I'll put it in properly in the... Okay, so we can hear it, but I shouldn't talk over it. Well, you can talk over it. I can still... Well, you can't because it's all on one channel. Oh, listen to you. I've learned from you, David. You've done it. Oh, yeah, it's muted. I hope it's really good.
Says something quite extreme, like... Turn it up.
Bad already, Pete, because Joe's looked up as if to say, but it was quite good. So the fact Joe might like it. I was going to say. You've gone down the wrong path. It sounded very past, very verve to me.
She took me all across the town I said I liked her, she knew it, she knew it We had to take it round, round, round, round, round
Wow, that's a big... This is a big moment for him. I can't quite hear it, but you're looking at me because I'm enjoying it with a sort of... No, the way I was looking was like, oh, God, it feels like he's opening up to her. Fair play to you, fella. That's what I was like when I wrote Happy Happy Girl and Elizabeth Smiles. Have I ever played you Elizabeth Smiles? Shall I go find it?
Yes, please. Does she smile in slow motion? I can't hear the words. Can you say what he said back to me? She knew it. She blew it. She spun me all around, round, round. I don't know what he's saying, then. Oh, Jesus, I feel really uncomfortable with you doing that. It sort of sounded like his record. I think that's what annoyed me. That's what I couldn't get my head around.
Oh, right, David could be singing this. She knew it, she blew it, she spun me all around. bass player giving Pete the thumbs up keep doing it keep doing what you're doing okay yeah cool does he mind us being a little bit flippant about his love song I wonder I don't know, really. She knew it. She knew it.
I tell you what, it's got its hooks into us. She knew it. Yeah.
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Chapter 7: What reflections do the hosts have on their podcasting journey?
It's catchy, so you just want to make your own verses. I think she's going to come back to him. Do you reckon that the band put a strain on their relationship?
No. The girls love it, do you think? Sorry, I was just trying to find... Umbrella smile. Oh, no. Oh, whatever. I'm bored of my own stuff. It's boring. Feels very 2021. I feel like that was peak Chattabix for me. I feel like we've been treading water this series. I do. I do. But it's hard when you do it on your own and the other person doesn't put anything towards it.
Did you tell Rosie that she's not on yesterday? No. No. Vivian this week? Hold on, let me do it now. Fucking hell, this is what I have to put up with. You would not have a part of it if it was this guy. Hi Vivian, sorry. Here's Joe. Ted Rose here.
I think there was something else vaguely... I'll play that song, by the way, Pete, at the end of the... I'll stick it at the end of the podcast so people can hear it. Thank you very much for sending it in, by the way. I'm sorry we sang it. Shall I say Rosie to do Monday? If you're about, I don't know what the situation is. Oh, no, I'm not. I don't think I'm... That's what I mean.
I don't know what's going on. That's what I mean. Literally no communication. And this sort of relationship is all about communication. It is. Then you belittle that I don't know what's going on. I think I've gaslit you. Fucking hell. I'm sorry. Are you about next week? I don't know. I sent you an email two or three days ago. Can you please send me the dates when you're around? Okay.
I've not received anything. Okay.
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Chapter 8: What future plans do the hosts discuss for their podcast?
Fucking nightmare. I am about next week, but I'm back not that Monday, so Tuesday.
Okay.
I bet Tuesday. I need it in emails. I just need to know what's going on. I'm going to pop it all in an email. It's easier, isn't it? When I send the text, did you just go, oh, I'll do that deal with that now. Can you please let me know when you're free between now and December so I can put that guess? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Fucking hell, yeah. I didn't think like that, David.
I thought... The cheeky giggle suggests you did. Is it a cheeky giggle? Oh, nervous cheeky giggle. Is it an irritating giggle now you're in a mood with me? Could you please hoover the landing? Yes, yes, yes. You haven't cleaned the downstairs toilet. I wouldn't do cheeky giggle. I'd go utterly silent. And I'd do it. I'm so on Patrick's side at this moment.
If there's been a delay on me doing something, I always then, because you haven't done that thing, I then try and do it immediately, which I always feel doesn't get me any... No. No. That doesn't help the other person. No, because they've asked you to sit. Fucking hell, this does feel like... Okay, right. Okay, I'll do stuff next week. No, you won't. You're just saying it for the pod. No, I will.
I will. If you do want to... Oh, yes, here. This is good. Crunch, crunch. Loving the pod, boys. I'll cut to the chase. I was optioned to be third assistant director for the latest series of Doc Martin. Fortunately, I didn't get the gig, but they have now contacted me to come in and do some days as an additional third AD for some big days. I start Thursday, the 2nd of June.
I'm a devoted Chatterbiscuit. I can assist you two into coming on the show. I remember Dave was pretty keen on getting yes. Never followed up on it. Why? Because this guy's involved. It's pretty last chance as this is the final series and only about six weeks left of filming.
This guy you meant me rather than the guy you're talking about. No, I sent someone an email.
Right. Anyway, let's focus on it. Side note, I live in Mullion. I live about 10 minutes from Cadgwith where Vivian recommended for some sea shantying and I know the place very well. Great spot on Friday night. Local fishermen drink pints and sing songs. So he could do two things for us. P.S. Give me a job. Here's my CV attached. Has he said his CV? Yeah. Is this guy a lunatic or a go-getter?
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