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Chatabix

S15 Ep 837: The Hunt for Joe’s Sinister Farm

12 May 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What mysterious discovery did Joe make during his walk?

37.358 - 77.754 David

this way for David done my nasal sprays so that's all I'm ready to go nasal sprays done pop a sminth in case we get off of each other Um, I don't know if I'm having a nice day. God, it's fucking dull, isn't it? I feel.

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77.875 - 82.84 Unknown

I still don't know.

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82.86 - 94.652 David

I'll tell you. Backstreet's back. All right.

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101.457 - 101.657 Joe

Hi.

103.801 - 105.303 Unknown

Oh, no, you're a bit delayed. You on the right?

105.683 - 127.286 Joe

Yeah, I've just jumped over to it, so it's probably just finding its feet. You all right? Yeah, I'm just closing down on my... We're all ready to talk. All ready to pod. Are we going to do our mystery?

127.887 - 128.648 David

You can do, yeah.

129.189 - 130.47 Joe

I wouldn't mind tucking in.

Chapter 2: What initial theories do Joe and David have about the farm?

319.178 - 321.12 Joe

You don't care about me, do you?

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321.88 - 327.606 David

What are you eating?

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0

327.806 - 331.15 David

What are you eating?

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331.17 - 333.832 James

Why smith, honey? A smith.

334.733 - 352.492 David

It sounds pathetic and mundane. It's so lonely. A pathetic peppermint. I mean, that's going to suck all the... Anyway. There was just a sort of vibe coming off the couple and I was just like, I want to get out of here.

352.512 - 357.977 Joe

I'm just trying to paint the picture in case you haven't heard. There weren't exactly a house or anything, but there were outbuildings.

358.317 - 376.633 David

There was outbuildings, there was a lot of shit about. And right, so for context, we'd sort of been walking and just going down lots of lovely sort of lanes and it was just like heaven. It was like the perfect walk. And I said to my mate, I said, there's not been one yard of this I haven't loved.

376.613 - 406.458 David

literally 200 meters later we've turned this corner what'd he say to that well sort of agreed i think but maybe maybe yeah oh yeah yeah as i said it i was a bit like but but yeah so we turn this thing and then it and it happens a lot you sort of You go, I will turn into farmland. We usually have this discussion. Or like private-ish land, but you've got right of way.

Chapter 3: How do Joe and David describe the atmosphere around the farm?

604.837 - 620.555 David

Mm-hmm. It's away from prying eyes. So it is a good place to do it. And there was a lot over there. I was like, well, that's definitely, like, there's stuff down there that no one's ever going to go down because it's... Right, this is the bit that is all so vague to me.

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620.795 - 631.37 Joe

I don't know what is there. You've been very vague about the outbuildings and the... Was there a house there? You go, well, there's shit there. What does that mean?

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631.45 - 640.204 David

Right, listen... I've got fucking two people over there who are eyeballing me, so a lot of my focus is on them.

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641.77 - 666.63 David

right so i've got eyeballs over here and there's stuff over there that i'm sort of glancing at but i've mainly got eyeballs there but it's like the whole i can't give you all the details because there was a lot going on in the moment there's eyeballs over there but we're away from prying eyes and there's potential for shit going on over there down that you know because

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666.61 - 692.061 David

like let's call it a farm even though it's not really a farm when you go into farm you go well i don't know what's going on in that barn i don't know what's going around on the back of that so there were barns buildings i'm calling them i'm calling them building barns for now all right yeah so i i haven't so i've got i'm mainly dealing with eyeballs over there yeah

692.362 - 699.115 David

And the third thing is the way that it was just, it felt like there was a hostile,

699.82 - 726.402 David

energy energy whereas like when i've come through places in and and earlier that day we walked through and we went through other bits where there were people one there's two types of thing happens where people don't even take a blind bit of notice yeah didn't do that that's the what usually happens is there's another couple of ramblers walking down there don't even back my lid or

726.601 - 740.371 David

Do you have a little hello? Hello. And they go, all right. And even if they're a bit grumpy or they're not particularly happy that you're walking down there, they don't give off a, like, fuck up, get, you know, like, that energy.

740.391 - 757.314 Joe

Even when they're grumpy. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Can I ask a question? If Simon was on this Zoom, would he say, no, you're right, actually, Joe, it's very strange, or would he go, yeah, I suppose it was a bit. Was he on board with how you were feeling?

Chapter 4: What specific details raised Joe's suspicion about the farm's activities?

1011.063 - 1015.311 Joe

Give us a list of things you've thought of. Drugs. High end.

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1017.274 - 1045.864 David

Quantities off. Right, anything else? Guns. Stolen goods I thought of in the moment then. Weed is my top one. I don't know. Fucking whatever. Just don't know. Yeah. Why else bad things are there that need storing?

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1045.884 - 1078.633 Joe

How old were they? Five years older than me. 56. Yeah, bang on, 56. Right, so they're quite old, and they're still, you think... Well, they're not settling down. They're surrounded by shit. What were they doing? Were they walking around? I imagine, this is what I'm seeing, rusted old barns, maybe a shitty old tractor, or I don't know, just junk there. Maybe an old...

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1078.613 - 1106.983 David

black old bonfire over there and like the grass is quite long and they're sort of standing yeah yeah and that you know but they had like a but do you know what this i've only just thought of they could have been like they had like a like a patch of um well this is suddenly quite suspicious they had a patch of there's probably bollocks this bit but they it was like a they had like a

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1108.162 - 1120.18 David

you call it like uh what's it an allotment he bit that they were standing in but nothing was grub so just what's going on there it's like isn't it a time of year where you'd be

1121.223 - 1146.032 David

basically you're like what are you hiding yes yeah essentially what's hiding and it might be why don't you want me here yeah exactly and and as i said some people don't want you there because it's just like this is my land and it annoys me when but it's been going on 20 years you don't you just go okay and i've seen you know done it left right and center

1146.097 - 1151.806 David

gone through people's land left, right and centre on the walks. This is the first time I felt like this.

1152.507 - 1163.645 Joe

Okay. So... Did you feel like if you had stuck around any longer, they would have gone, eh! I didn't... I'll tell you what I didn't want to do, was stop.

1163.745 - 1186.133 David

Like, I didn't want to do... I felt pretty cool about it so often. I was thinking about, like... After we chatted about it the other day, I was like, I was thinking about going back with my phone out. And I went, fuck, I don't want to do that. I don't want to look like I'm filming. And I didn't really want to stop and kind of engage with them.

Chapter 5: What evidence do they discuss that could suggest illegal activities?

1342.336 - 1362.522 David

get another sending it to me okay yeah thanks it's you right when you look at when you look at it i think the map's a bit skewed i think you have to sort of turn it that way so no i said never excited this is hilarious what

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1363.16 - 1372.134 Joe

So, I think... Do you know what's annoying? It's a part of that of West Sussex. I don't quite know. Oh, right.

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1372.154 - 1382.451 David

Well, see that. But I think you have to look at it like that. I think if you get a map of... I think... Right. I think the... Right, James, can you start bleeping out names? I think...

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1385.975 - 1401.211 Joe

Oh, I see what you mean. Yeah, so... Yeah, so it's between there and there. Right, okay. But I think when you look at it, it needs to be... Yeah. Okay. Right, but it's... Yes, yes.

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1401.231 - 1406.757 David

Yeah, it's a bit skewed, so it's sort of... You see, can you see there's literally nothing there?

1407.678 - 1409.12 Joe

Yeah. Yeah.

1409.48 - 1412.944 David

First bit of... Oh, yeah. Nothing there, right?

1413.665 - 1413.805 Joe

Mm-hmm.

1414.443 - 1419.952 David

So there's your first, like, middle of nowhere, not even houses or anything.

Chapter 6: How do Joe and David plan to investigate further?

1641.21 - 1647.736 David

I think so. Right, look. Look at your map. Does it look like that? Are you at that point? Oh. That's where the farm is.

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1648.557 - 1655.603 Joe

Oh, you're there. Sorry. Okay, I've gone a bit further. All right. Go back. Hang on. Keep showing me that.

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1655.823 - 1669.857 David

See those two big brown buildings or big brown squares? Oh, there. Yeah, that is where... That is where... That is where... See that? Right. Do you want to see my... See here?

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1670.597 - 1673.46 Joe

Hang on, hang on, hang on. Yeah.

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1673.693 - 1698.638 David

we came in there yeah came in there saw the people about there and worked all the way round and then to there they stood here oh right they're eyeballing us all the way around there and then sort of lost sight of them sort of here so they're they're there all the shit's there

1699.225 - 1729.047 David

yeah so all the shit's there so look and as i said look look all that stuff behind like i said look all that's there so that's all there's all going could be goings on there right they're near a b road yes well i didn't know that but but they are near a b road Yes. Okay, the nearer B road, I'll give you that. But you're going to be hurtling past that.

1729.91 - 1741.33 Joe

No, understood. I'm just letting people know the nearer B road. Well, yeah, but... I'm not ruining it for anyone. Everyone's probably near a B road at some point.

1741.47 - 1748.518 David

But what I'm saying is that there, when you walk down there, feels like there's no way of seeing in there. Nothing there.

1748.758 - 1749.92 Joe

Nothing there. That's what it feels like.

Chapter 7: What conclusions do they reach about the people they encountered?

1957.99 - 1961.474 Joe

I mean, what were we going to see, though? Do you know what?

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1962.155 - 1967.781 David

I've just seen something that's annoyed me. There's a massive front entrance on the B road.

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1968.221 - 1973.434 Joe

I know. It's what I should have been looking at. That's exactly what I assume.

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1973.594 - 1981.884 David

So I just went back where all the shit is, because they're hiding it from the people coming in the front, aren't they? That's where you put your shit. That's not the main entrance in.

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1983.526 - 1989.092 Joe

No, the main entrance in is just like a regular working farm.

1989.112 - 1989.873 Unknown

Yeah, I'll give you that.

1997.482 - 1998.784 Joe

And you were walking on their land?

1999.264 - 2000.886 David

I was walking at the back of their land.

2001.608 - 2004.112 Joe

Yeah, and they're just fucked off with it. It's just done with it.

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