the power of choosing yourself.
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What does “choosing yourself” really mean and why is it different from self‑care?
Okay, hi. So I wanna talk about choosing yourself and what that really means. I always thought I knew what it means until I actually did it for real, and my life looks completely Different than it did 30 days ago. I'm making this video because I know there are a lot of you who probably are on your self-love journey or you're looking to just upgrade your life or transform your life for the better, moving into the fall and moving into 2027. It's so crazy that we're already in September. It's like my favorite time of year. And this is a month and a season, September in particular and October. I feel like where it's time to transform and really lock in and get serious. I never wait till January. So let's talk about it.
The power of choosing yourself and what What that really means. It doesn't mean saying a million self-love affirmations. It doesn't mean going to the gym and getting a workout in and journaling after. Taking care of yourself is one thing, and that's really, really important. But there's a whole other layer and component to it that I felt like I was missing for so long. And I feel like a lot of you are gonna probably relate to this. Choosing myself wasn't about doing things on my own and taking myself. out to dinner and you know being with myself. Choosing yourself requires getting rid of your hypervigilance. Now what is hypervigilance? It's when you're constantly living in fear mode and scanning the room for something to change or waiting for something external outside of yourself to change so you could feel better about yourself.
For example, once I'm in a relationship, once I'm married, once I meet the love of my life, then I'll be happy. Or once I get this job promotion, then I'll be satisfied. Then I'll be happy with my life. Once I get to travel around the world and make a certain amount of money, then I'll be happy. Coming from someone who's been everywhere, I'm not saying that in a flex way, but I've literally traveled so much in my life.
How does hyper‑vigilance keep us stuck in a constant “waiting for something external” mindset?
I've been so lucky enough to have so many amazing opportunities in my life that I'm so grateful for. But coming from someone who's done a lot of things, My life, I can confidently say that none of those things long term made me happier and made me really love myself. Were they fun? Was it cool? Did I have an amazing time? Yes, in moments, as I said, I'm so grateful for what I've been able to do in my life. But I was missing so much within myself that anytime I would go to a place, my internal state would just follow me there. I would get a dope. Dopamine rush for the first couple of days. And then I would sink back into this version of myself where I was like, something is off, like something is missing.
And I couldn't put my finger on it until I understood this concept of hyper-vigilance. Hypervigilance is what I was just saying. It's like you're always on high alert. You're always like looking for the next best thing to satisfy your ego and something external that's gonna make you happy, whether it's a relationship. Whether it's money, whether it's an opportunity, you're always waiting for the next thing to make you happy. When in reality, you have to get happy with yourself regardless of what's going on before you're able to properly receive anything. And that's how the laws of the universe actually work. And that's how energy works. I fell into this very rigid way of manifesting, which is why over the last couple of years, I haven't been able to manifest the way that I wanted to.
To. I have been able to do amazing things, don't get me wrong. I've had a lot of amazing things happen to me. I met amazing people. I definitely achieved a lot of things in my career that I wanted to achieve, but I felt like there was something heavy blocking me from reaching my greatest potential. This is what choosing yourself really is about. It's getting rid of that feeling of always waiting for the next best thing and learning how to sit. With yourself and love who you are without anything. And what happens when you really master that is that you're not looking for anything or anyone to complete you.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What does “choosing yourself” really mean and why is it different from self‑care?
0:00–1:53
2
How does hyper‑vigilance keep us stuck in a constant “waiting for something external” mindset?
1:53–4:07
3
Why is letting go of the “next best thing” essential for true self‑love?
4:07–6:45
4
How can we break the cycle of seeking validation through career metrics and social‑media numbers?
6:45–8:39
5
What steps did I take to re‑brand my life and create a program that reflects my authentic self?
8:39–10:48
6
How does opening the heart improve our ability to attract healthy romantic relationships?
10:48–13:04
7
Why does a calm, grounded inner state lead to better manifestation and timing?
13:04–14:45
8
What daily practices can help listeners choose themselves and stay aligned with their true purpose?
14:45–14:45