Anything Goes (Part 4)

episode

Distractible 1h 3m 4 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 5 months ago

▲ 0

Transcript

jump: chapters · speakers · find in transcript

Transcript

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

What humorous stories do the hosts share about their personal lives?

Bob 0:00

Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to Distractible, this episode. Mogging Mark jetsets, blows off the boys, then talks robot talk. Wagtastic Wade gets dismissed by James, mistaken for a situagenarian. Shaved, sued by Disney, and street snorkels. Booming Head Bob describes doggy drug fisting. Chides concrete constructs, slams Sora. and carpet bombs proliferating penguins. From flatulence maxing to dorking wives. Yes! It's time for Anything Goes Part 4. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.

Mark 0:56

Hi, welcome to Distractable, the show where you're going to laugh and laugh and laugh because of these two funny gentlemen right here and sometimes me.

Unknown 1:06

This one's named Bob. No, I guess this one's named Wade. And that one's named Bob. Very funny. Eh? Yeah, yeah. And don't forget about our editors.

Mark 1:17

Editors make them laugh.

Unknown 1:22

Ah, fart noises never get old. Good one, boys. Good one, good one, good one. It was okay. Over here judging farts. Who are you to judge farts? Are you the host? Seriously, are you the host? Who's hosting? I don't know. That is a good name for an episode. We judge each other's farts. That's such a good name.

Wade 1:41

God.

Unknown 1:42

Brings me back to the fart genie. There's no other level to it either. It's just judging each other's farts. That's a tough one. I think that one has to have homework, right? I feel like you have to record every fart you do for like a week or a month or something, and then we bring them in so we can talk about it.

How does the discussion shift to the topic of AI and its implications?

Unknown 1:56

That's a tough one, but I feel like that'd be worth it. Have you seen the TikTok about the guy who was trying to fart Max? No. What's he like, eating beans and stuff? Oh man, he was eating so much more than beans. What does it mean to fart max? Is that a phrase? Well, the video is like, he's like, and now welcome to episode 39 of Fart Maxing. I've got some super kimchi here along with some fiber and some pickle juice and some high starch beans for maximum volume and... Oh, extra fart beans. Yeah, and then he got some spicy peppers in there. It was like, I think this is going to be the greatest concoction I've ever had. And it just turns to him on the toilet being like, I am in the most pain I've ever been in my life.

Unknown 2:35

Fart Max failed. I'll get him next time, boys. I kinda hate that. Yeah, I'm glad my algorithm didn't think that I was super into that because I only saw two of his videos. Well, now that we've mentioned it, it definitely will show up. That sounds like a much funnier version of the, have you seen the day 300 of spraying dog medicine on my hands until I can punch through brick walls, guy?

Mark 2:56

I forgot about that.

Unknown 2:57

Yeah. What happened to him? He's like still going. He's over a year. It's awful. Literally, he does it and his hands sound like they're made of, I don't even know, somehow glass or something. It's horrific. Why would you want that? He reached a point where his hands are so calloused that like they give off, they have like constant static charge. So if he just holds his hand near rice, he can like levitate rice because his hands are so fucking, his hands just like are infinitely statically charged because he's just fucking shoving them in buckets of rice 24-7.

Mark 3:28

Oh man, that's really funny.

Unknown 3:31

Wade, you need to spend either way more or way less time on the internet. You're not seeing the right stuff. I think the answer is more to see that, but I'm going to go with less because I don't know that I want to. There's nothing wrong. Look, it's concerning because I wouldn't want it, and I don't know who's ever going to let that man touch them in the rest of his life, but it's fascinating that this guy is so dead set on having literal hands of steel. He could beat Superman in a hand toughness competition, presumably. Oddly specific. A bunch of nerds just raced into the comment section to tell me how stupid that was. But I bet he could do it. I bet he could do it. I bet he could. I mean, he's obviously gaining superpowers right now.

Wade 4:12

Just hands. Nothing beyond hands.

Unknown 4:14

The rest of him is totally normal. But his hands? You don't want to let him touch you.