I Miss The Old Distractible (Part 2)
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What is the opening ad and introduction for the episode?
This episode of Distractable is presented by Vitamin Water. Some drinks are fun, some are functional, but Vitamin Water said, why not both? There is nothing more refreshing than like a nice vitamin water ice cold sip in the heat. I only drink zero sugar drinks, so of course I'm a fan of the zero sugar rehydrate pineapple passion fruit. I'm a big pineapple guy. Pineapple good. Born in New York City, built for people who work hard. Hard and play hard. Grab a vitamin water today. Copyright 2025 Glasso. Vitamin Water is a registered trademark of Glasso.
Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to Distractable. This episode. Musky Mark reports big beavers, sexist maggots, and ape anal ornamentation. Then plays Time Lord. Welching Wade Bones is optician. Predicts apocalypse, shouts himself, and gets cock-crunched. Bewitching Bob explains the birds and the bees. Will Smith's noodle slapping and poops his pants. From deft dependence to elephant. Find snakes. Yeah! It's time for I Miss the Old Distractable Part 2. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.
Well, well, well. Look who's back again. Crawlin's back to who us at Distractable. Thought you could stay away for a while, but look, you're addicted. You're addicted, and that's okay to admit. You want this. Yeah. And we're gonna give it to you! We're gonna give it to you. Addiction is the first step to recovery. It actually is, if you think about it. You have to be addicted to recover in the first place. So, congratulations, you are now addicted to us. And you have a problem, and we're the only solution. You'll keep wanting more and more of us until it becomes a problem and it'll destroy your life, but hey, it's It'll feel good while it's happening. That's the distractable motto. Yeah. And we got uh Wade Cocaine Minion777.
Bob uh I feel bugs under my skin's hair. I mean yeah. Yeah, yeah. Actually, Wade, you should have been heroine because you got no hair and it would have been funny. Uh you could be methoplier. Meth I'm methoplier. Oh wait, I think I see all of our advertisers leaving. Where are they going? What's the one you inject between your toes and it makes your your feet fall off? Foot foot crack. I don't know. We got it. They call us the foot crack of podcasts. That's what they say. Man, I wish they would stop, but they don't. But welcome back to another episode. I'm hosting, and boy howdy, do I have a same one for you. Uh, but before we get to that, we're gonna get to other things. Oh. Lots of other things are happening in this episode.
And I believe in the we. That is gonna hey. This is Bob and Wade. What's up? How's it going, everybody? These guys uh are here to talk all about the small world that they live in with all the drugs that they take. Um, who wants to lead it off? Me. I want to take the initiative today. Uh I was telling you guys a little bit about this, but I guess I should let our beautiful viewers and listeners know too. I had a similar experience to one of my co-hosts where I had each other Emails and voicemails and text messages from uh the place where I get my contacts and my glasses. And I was like, Oh man, I wonder what's up. They're really trying to get a hold of me. And it's like you have a balance that's overdue. If you don't pay it, you're we're gonna turn you over to the collection company.
This and that. I was like, I thought I just paid this like two weeks ago. Oh god, what happened? I got this miscommunication. I gotta figure out what's going on. So I called them up and I would wait on the call, had to like select, you know, press three if you want. Done, yes, yes, get me through. Yes, yes, give me three. There is no one currently available. Please hold. Okay, this uh text came out, but there's no one to talk to about it. Okay, I'll just wait. And uh we had like a 10, 20 minute break. I spent 10 of those minutes waiting. Uh this is really important. I gotta take care of right now. I don't wanna go to a collection company. Uh lady answers and says, hey, how can I help you? I was like, I got this bill, I gotta pay it.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the opening ad and introduction for the episode?
0:00–6:48
2
How do the hosts explain the “addiction to the show” concept?
6:48–14:22
3
What predictions do they make about the future (price of eggs, politics, etc.)?
14:22–21:59
4
What bizarre news items (beavers, maggots, sex‑ist maggots) do they discuss?
21:59–29:34
5
Which cryptids and folklore creatures are covered in the episode?
29:34–35:29
6
What personal “oh‑shit” moments and nightmares do the hosts share?
35:29–41:32
7
How do they run the joke‑tier‑list and decide the winner?
41:32–46:56
8
Who wins the episode and what are the final sponsor shout‑outs?
46:56–53:05