We’re All Cucks, But Some Of Us Never Found the Right Chair | The Napoleonic Wars (Part 4/10)

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Fin vs History 1h 2m 3 speakers 7 chapters transcribed 4 days ago
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What is the opening “Dad’s Night” segment about and how does it set the tone for the episode?

Fin Taylor 0:09
Welcome back to Finn vs History. Uh joined me is Ratio Gore. Hello. And I'm having a lovely time. That's what I want to know it. I'm really enjoying this. Dad's out at sea. No, it's dad it's dad's night. Yeah. We've had ladies' night, but now the dads are just bobbing on a fucking ring in the middle of the sea.
Horatio Gould 0:26
Yeah. Fuck off this is the twenty minutes on holiday that your dad will play with you before he gets bored. This is in the middle where it feels like it'll be okay.
Fin Taylor 0:36
Christ, that was harrowing. I thought you were doing it from the perspective of a dad.
Horatio Gould 0:41
No.
Fin Taylor 0:41
But you're doing it from the perspective of you twenty twenty years ago. Yeah. Daz I got a date with a ping pong actress or whatever they're called, ping pong artist. Yeah. Uh Oh sorry, artists. Uh welcome back to our epic series on the Napoleonic Wars. This is part four, uh, where we are discussing the aftermath of the Battle of Denal. Uh Nelson has destroyed Napoleon's navy in Egypt. Yes. The French are fucked. Yep. Just drink it in. It's good stuff. The French just stranded in the desert. Um and what does Nelson do? As soon as he's beaten the navy, he sails to Naples and gets into a polygamous relationship. Yes. Phenomenal. He becomes part of a polycule. I mean, this is just not at all what you expect. When you're looking at that column, you're not thinking that he's a polyamory body.
Fin Taylor 1:33
I mean, polyamory in 18th century Britain is not at all
Horatio Gould 1:37
I guess they're still working it out. This is pre Victorian, so it's before they fucking slap slap that door shut. When
Fin Taylor 1:43
do they slap that door shut?
Horatio Gould 1:44
Yeah.
Fin Taylor 1:45
And we've let it op we've let it open a fraction again now. And it's just they've just r rammed. And now no arsehole is sacred. Uh so what happens is that he sails to uh Naples, uh which he has been to before in seventeen ninety three, and he's met this woman called Emma Hamilton, uh Lady Hamilton, who is the wife of Sir William Hamilton, who is the ambassador in Naples. Now Naples is a Italian city state or some kind of
Horatio Gould 2:12
Yes the Kingdom of Naples. It's yeah, it's the centre of uh one of the Italian kingdoms. Because
Fin Taylor 2:16
again, Italy does not yet exist. It is a uh it's a series of disconnected Groping men groping men who are car bloating.
Horatio Gould 2:25
Basically, what happens when Garibaldi um links them all together that these Italian kingdoms are just groping around for each other. Eventually, in the eighteen hundreds, they their hands all grope each other.
Fin Taylor 2:36
Yeah
Unknown 2:37
and
Fin Taylor 2:39
They're both going for the same tip. After after you, no after you and then they realize that they're stronger together. And you know, it's a great day for Italian men, it's a terrible time for Italian women. Eighteen sixty three is it really that's they look back on that and go, Fuck me. Yeah. We didn't know how many rapists there were in this peninsula.
Horatio Gould 2:58
Um but it's important because Britain needs footholds in the Mediterranean, so they're just trying to
Fin Taylor 3:02
rather than handholds in the
Horatio Gould 3:05
They need to have gr they need to have grope holds in the most room. Naples is a very key grope hold for A key grope hold.
Fin Taylor 3:13
Yeah. And that's what Nelson is doing. He's going there to to get it to establish a grope hold.
Horatio Gould 3:17
When in when in Rome does the Romans.
Fin Taylor 3:19
Yeah, exact exactly. So he goes to Naples and he links up with this woman, uh Emma Hamilton, who he had met previously, uh, the wife of the ambassador. Now she is uh a bit of a goer. Yes. Um to say the least. She is a um and at this point she's not quite as fulsome as the photo Charlie's just put up on the screen. Uh she's uh she's famed for her quotes, attitudes, which uh is a sort of eighteenth century slang for Or um slaggery, is it? Yes. Dramatic performances in which he posed as figures from classical antiquity.
Horatio Gould 3:50
Yeah, there's but it's intellectual slaggery. There's there's a I
Fin Taylor 3:53
apologize.
Horatio Gould 3:55
It's it's an elevation elevated slaggery.
Fin Taylor 3:57
Doctor Kinger from Big Brother. Letters after her name, Vog vodka bottle up a small.
Horatio Gould 4:06
Of
Fin Taylor 4:06
course.
Fin Taylor 4:13
Actually, what bottle what brand we need to know what brand we need
Horatio Gould 4:16
to know what br what brand does K. What brand does
Fin Taylor 4:18
Kinger shove up a fanny? What brand of alcohol is it?

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