TPP 002: Alison Bower on When School Isn't a Fit: What to Expect and How to Handle It

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Why do many parents feel like they’re failing when their child doesn’t fit the traditional school system?

Alison Bower 0:00
Whenever your child is moving through something that other people's children don't seem to be moving through, it feels like you're failing somehow. Even though you look at your child and you're like, no, no, no, no, no, this child isn't doing anything wrong. There are so many systems. There must be a school. There must be a way. There must be a place. Well, the reality is that institutional learning is is just not always the right fit. And what we're learning more and more and more is that institutional learning is really not the right fit for quite a lot of people.
Debbie Reber 0:38
Welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently-wired kids. I'm your host, Debbie Reber, and today's episode features a conversation with educator, curriculum consultant, and parent coach, Allison Bauer. Allison is a dear friend of mine and also without doubt the person I've relied on the most over the years for her thoughtful insights and perspectives on the trickier aspects of raising my child. In today's episode, Allison and I talk about school fit, as many of us raising differently wired kids at some point along the way go through a time when our child's school experience can get, shall we say, a little bumpy.
Debbie Reber 1:17
And because Allison has been on both sides of this equation, as an educator and school administrator, and also as a parent, she brings a unique perspective to this issue. In our conversation, Allison shares some super useful insights on what problems with school fit look like from a school's perspective, as well as how parents can navigate figuring out how to support their child in that situation. Oh, I just also have to say the setting on my microphone got switched to one that picks up room ambience for this interview. I'm not naming any names on who might have turned it off. I'm just saying. So if you notice a difference in the tone of my mic today, that's why. All right. So here is my conversation on school fit with Alison Bauer.
Debbie Reber 2:01
Hi, Allison. Hi. Thank you so much for being one of the first guests for the Tilt podcast. Oh, you're welcome. I'm super honored. I'm so excited that you're a part of this. And as I probably remind you most every time that we talk, you've just been a huge part of my personal parenting support team. So I'm just really excited to share you with listeners and you and your brilliance.
Alison Bower 2:24
Oh, well, goodness.
Debbie Reber 2:26
You knew I
Alison Bower 2:26
was
Debbie Reber 2:26
going to gush a little bit. I knew you were going to do that, but I didn't know
Alison Bower 2:30
exactly what you were going to say. That's lovely.
Debbie Reber 2:32
So before we dive in, I want to let listeners know a little bit more about you. You're an educator. You're a parent coach based in Seattle. You have more than 16 years experience in teaching, administration, curricular planning, management and professional development for early childhood, elementary and middle schools. You have taught parenting classes or presented at companies like Starbucks HQ and the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, as well as many public and private schools. And you have a new responsibility as the communications manager at the ed tech nonprofit and learn. You've also got three amazing boys and you are a step parent. And I know being a step parent, a step mom is part of how you identify and being in a blended family.
Debbie Reber 3:19
And I also know that I'm scratching the surface on what you do. So this is just you in a nutshell. But we were talking before we started recording about your coaching practice has evolved. And maybe before we start the conversation, tell us specifically how you're working with people right now.
Alison Bower 3:35
Yeah, sure. So basically what I've noticed over time in my coaching practice is that there is a specific, you know, niche for parent coaching, working specifically with families who are looking for solutions and guidance around specifically what I use is mostly positive discipline in relationship to their families and their children and how they want to be mindfully raising their children and creating relationships.

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