TPP 051a: Asher and Debbie Talk About Handling Parent-Child Conflict
episode
Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
26 min
1 speaker
8 chapters
transcribed 6 hours ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Do Debbie and Asher actually experience parent‑child conflict?
Hey there, it's Debbie and welcome to Playback Friday. Every Friday I'll re-release one of my favorite conversations from the archives. Unless you're a longtime listener of the show, there's a good chance you haven't heard this one yet. And even if you have, you just may get something completely different listening to it this time around. No matter what happened, I couldn't ever let you see me sweat. I couldn't ever let you see me get upset. And that sounds stressful. Yeah, it was stressful because I was keeping so much inside, which is not healthy. And it doesn't really help you either because you were struggling with such intense anger and emotions. And then here I am acting like
everybody else was was like that. Exactly. Perfect.
Welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids. I'm your host, Debbie Rieber, and today's episode is a special Kids POV episode with my 12-year-old child Asher. Today, Asher and I are going to talk about conflict. More specifically, conflict between the two of us. Because I've heard from listeners who want to know A, if we do have conflicts, and B, if so, how do we handle them? So the quick answer to that first part of the question is yes, we definitely have conflict. I am very human in that way, as is Asher. So today we're going to talk about the things that do crop. up and cause conflict between us and then we'll share with you what that actually looks like, what I do, what he does, and most importantly how we move through and past it.
And we'll get right to that conversation after this quick break. Hey Asher Hello How are you today? Excellent. Good. Well, we are doing another Asher special podcast, as you know, and today we are gonna be talking about conflict. I've gotten this question from more than one person, people who are curious to know how we handle conflict. And that's assuming we have conflict. That's a big assumption, don't you think?
Yeah. Which we don't.
We
don't? Okay,
we do. I actually think it's funny because we tried to record this two days ago. And we had a conflict. We didn't have a big conflict, but it was not working. I think it was 'cause it was c towards the end of the day and you were just not very engaged and I was feeling a little stressed that we needed to get the podcast recorded. So what was a mini conflict? Did you remember how we handled that?
Uh by recording it today instead.
Yeah, so we decided to record it today instead. And yeah, it wasn't a big conflict. I was a little frustrated. But I think in that case I just said, Okay, we're not gonna do this now and I kind of just let it go and I went in my office and worked on something else and took a few breaths and that was kind of the end of it, right?
Yeah.
So before we get into the conversation about conflicts in terms of how we handle it in our relationship I'm curious to know what your opinion is about conflicts. Do you think that they're good? Do you think they're something that we should avoid? What do you think?
I think they're necessary. Without conflicts you'll never know how strong your relationship is.
Okay.
What kinds of everyday issues trigger conflicts between Debbie and Asher?
Can you say more about that? How does a how does a conflict give you that information?
Well if it tears your relationship apart, then obviously it wasn't strong enough.
Right. I can see that answer when it comes to friendships, right? That makes sense. But what about in a mother-son relationship? So I think that conflicts are just a normal part of any relationship. Yeah. I know that some people feel uncomfortable ab about conflicts or maybe kind of want to avoid them at all costs, but There certainly have been a part of our relationship and I do think that they have made us stronger working through some of our conflicts. Yeah. That's my What are the kinds of things that we have conflicts about?
Well, sometimes when I miss dinner. Mm. Although that's usually my conflict with myself. It's true. Because I feel bad about missing dinner.
It used to be a bigger problem in that your dad and or I would get upset if you missed dinner, but now
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
Do Debbie and Asher actually experience parent‑child conflict?
0:00–3:27
2
What kinds of everyday issues trigger conflicts between Debbie and Asher?
3:27–6:26
3
How did the “order of operations” math lesson become a real family conflict?
6:26–9:43
4
What does each person notice about the other’s behavior when they get upset?
9:43–13:01
5
How do Debbie and Asher move from anger to calm after a disagreement?
13:01–15:51
6
What role does apologizing and empathy play in repairing their relationship?
15:51–19:28
7
How do they use proactive collaborative problem‑solving to prevent future fights?
19:28–22:38
8
What lasting lessons do they share about leaning into conflict rather than avoiding it?
22:38–26:18
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
TPP 266a: A Conversation with Poet and Advocate LeDerick Horne
TPP 522: A Whole Child Approach to ADHD with Phil Boucher, M.D.
TPP 091a: A Conversation With Steve Silberman About His Book “Neurotribes”
TPP 521: A Conversation with Dr. Peter Gray About Restoring Childhood
TPP 253a: Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks
TPP 520: Dr. Özgür Bolat on Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science of Motivating Kids