TPP 140a: AuthorJulie Lythcott-Haims on How Parents Can Help Their Kids Successfully Launch
episode
Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
44 min
1 speaker
3 chapters
transcribed 14 hours ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is the central premise of Julie Lythcott‑Haims’ book *How to Raise an Adult*?
Hey there, it's Debbie and welcome to Playback Friday. Every Friday I'll re-release one of my favorite conversations from the archives. Unless you're a longtime listener of the show, there's a good chance you haven't heard this one yet. And even if you have, you just may get something completely different listening to it this time around.
I see kids who are just they're just handled and managed and all they have to do is sit there and be driven from place to place. And we do have high expectations. They have to work hard, you know, to get the right grades that we want them to have and they have to be on that team that we want them to be on. So they get into the right college or whatever. I mean, they it's not like they're lazy. But there is so much of their lives that is managed, planned, constructed, perfected, fixed, handled for them. And that deprives them of feeling the basic agency humans need to have in order to be healthy and whole humans.
Welcome to Till Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids. I'm Debbie Reber, your host, and my guest today is the brilliant Julie Lithcott Haymes. Julie is one of those guests I've been wanting to bring on the show pretty much since I first launched this podcast, so I am thrilled to finally be bringing this interview to you. And if Julie's name's familiar, it may be because she's the author of the New York Times best-selling and in my opinion majorly game-changing in the parenting space book, How to Raise an Adult. She wrote it after noticing that prospective college students of Stanford, where she was the Dean of Admissions, were being overparented and were lacking the resources to develop the resilience, resourcefulness, and the inner determination necessary for success.
Today, Julie and I are gonna talk about what it takes for a child to be successful, looking at how we define success itself along the way, and what we as parents can do to help our child develop the agency they need to become self-actualized adults. And a few things from Julie's bio. Julie's book How to Raise an Adult has been published in over two dozen countries and gave rise to a TED talk that became one of the top TED Talks of twenty sixteen with over three and a half million views. Most recently she authored the book Real American, a memoir examining racism through Julie's experience as a black and biracial person. Her work has appeared in many media outlets, including The New York Times, The Chicago Tribune, The Atlantic, Parents, PBS News Hour, CBS This Morning, Good Morning America, on and on.
So I loved having this conversation with Julie. I am still noodling on the many takeaways and aha moments I experienced. I hope you get a lot out of it. And before I get to my conversation with Julie, a quick reminder that my book Differently Wired is newly available as an audiobook, narrated by yours truly. Yes, it's true I had to audition to get the job, but I was able to read the book and it was a lot of fun and also a lot of work, but I'm really happy with how it turned out. So to listen to Differently Wired, visit Amazon.com. You can download it using Audible. You can also Also listen to a sample if you wanna see what it sounds like. And if you'd like to watch the TED X talk I gave in Amsterdam at the end of twenty eighteen called Why the Future Will Be Differently Wired, you can find it on the homepage of Tilt Parenting at TiltParenting dot com.
I wrote this speech with a broader audience in mind as I really wanted to challenge employers and colleagues and community members and other people in our lives who might not be raising differently wired kids to consider the importance of neurodivergence and to consider the importance of our kids in our society. So I would love your help spreading the word to these audiences. So please check it out. share it on your social media, your blogs, however we can get the word out there. So thank you so much for considering that.
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Chapters
3 chapters
1
What is the central premise of Julie Lythcott‑Haims’ book *How to Raise an Adult*?
0:00–5:17
2
How does fear‑based parenting develop and why do most parents act from love, ego, and fear?
5:17–32:29
3
Why are everyday challenges and “mistakes & curveballs” essential for a child’s growth?
32:29–44:36
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
TPP 266a: A Conversation with Poet and Advocate LeDerick Horne
TPP 522: A Whole Child Approach to ADHD with Phil Boucher, M.D.
TPP 091a: A Conversation With Steve Silberman About His Book “Neurotribes”
TPP 521: A Conversation with Dr. Peter Gray About Restoring Childhood
TPP 253a: Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks
TPP 520: Dr. Özgür Bolat on Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science of Motivating Kids