TPP 207a: Dr. Tina Payne Bryson on The Power of Showing Up
episode
Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
57 min
1 speaker
7 chapters
transcribed 8 hours ago
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is the purpose of “The Power of Showing Up” and how does it differ from other parenting books?
Hey, it's Debbie. Today I'm sharing a Playback Friday episode. Unless you're a longtime listener, you likely haven't heard this one yet. And even if you have, I bet you'll get something completely different from it this time around. Welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids. My guest today is likely no stranger to you, because I am thrilled to be talking with psychotherapist and author Tina Payne Bryson. Tina is the co author of some of my favorite groundbreaking brain science and parenting books, including the whole Brain Child and No Drama Discipline, which she co wrote with Dr. Dan Siegel.
She is also the founder and executive director of the Center for Connection, a multidisciplinary clinical practice, and of the Play Strong Institute, a center devoted to the study, research, and practice of play therapy through a neurodevelopmental lens. Tina's new book is called The Power of Showing Up, and it's perhaps my most favorite of all of the books she and Dan have written together. It focuses on what I believe so deeply is important with our differently wired kids that we truly show up for them. And now here is my conversation with Tina. Hello Tina, welcome to the podcast.
Hi, so good to be with you, Debbie. I look forward to our conversation.
Me too, and I feel like this conversation is a is a long time coming and there's so much that we could talk about, but I'm really grateful to be I don't know if I'm even introducing you to my community. I think everyone knows who you are, but to be sharing your your new work with them and just have those conversations. So I always ask my guests to, you know, tell us a little bit about who they are in the world as a way to get started. Maybe because I've already introduced you kind of professionally, how would you just introduce yourself in terms of, you know, your why maybe for what you do?
You know, I never meant to write books or be a professional speaker or own a clinical practice. Those were never goals for me. My goal always, always growing up for all the way into my married years, early married years, um was to be a stay at home mom. That's what I wanted to do more than anything. That was like to me the best thing I you know, my best job. And uh it turned out we moved to California and I I was home with my firstborn, my eighteen month old, and my husband who's an English professor was like, We can't afford to live here unless you work and I was like, But that's not part of the play. Um You know, we waited to have kids until he finished his dissertation so that I could s you know, stay home.
So, um, I said, Okay, well fine, if I have to work then I need to get a PhD really fast because um I'm gonna be a professor so I can be home with the kids more and that's kinda how This uh this journey started, although I will say a little bit before that I had heard Bruce Perry speak. And my brain lit up and uh I just couldn't learn enough about the brain. And I'm such a person that is just naturally super curious and I always wanna understand the why. And So when I started the PhD program in social work I was really frustrated uh as a grad student because I kept wondering the why and I never could get satisfactory answers. And then I heard Dan Siegel speak. at a conference and this was probably in two thousand.
He was not known at the time very well. and his kind of theories and his way of approaching understanding reality. just lit my brain up and I was like, I have to study with this guy. So I started studying with him and then I kept having babies. So I have three boys who are now uh twenty, seventeen, and thirteen. And As I was raising them, and I was finishing this PhD in social work focused on child rearing science. I was also studying interpersonal neurobiology with Dan and I was Learning about the science and how
How did Tina Payne Bryson’s personal journey and academic background lead to her focus on attachment science?
That could shape so much what we understand about our kids' behaviors and what we were doing intentionally. In the experiences we were giving our kids.
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
What is the purpose of “The Power of Showing Up” and how does it differ from other parenting books?
0:00–4:10
2
How did Tina Payne Bryson’s personal journey and academic background lead to her focus on attachment science?
4:10–11:27
3
What are the four S’s (Safe, Seen, Soothed, Secure) and why are they essential for secure attachment?
11:27–23:06
4
How can parents practice the “Safe” component when children are in distress or acting out?
23:06–33:39
5
What practical strategies does Tina suggest for “Seeing” and “Soothe” – especially during emotional meltdowns?
33:39–44:20
6
Why is “Repair” after a rupture so important and how can parents model it effectively?
44:20–54:24
7
How has the COVID‑19 pandemic created new opportunities for parents to strengthen attachment?
54:24–57:09
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
TPP 266a: A Conversation with Poet and Advocate LeDerick Horne
TPP 522: A Whole Child Approach to ADHD with Phil Boucher, M.D.
TPP 091a: A Conversation With Steve Silberman About His Book “Neurotribes”
TPP 521: A Conversation with Dr. Peter Gray About Restoring Childhood
TPP 253a: Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks
TPP 520: Dr. Özgür Bolat on Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science of Motivating Kids