TPP 211a: Parenting Scripts for Stressed Out Moments with Kids, with Dr. Adele Lafrance
episode
Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
35 min
1 speaker
8 chapters
transcribed 8 hours ago
Transcript
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Hey, it's Debbie. Today I'm sharing a Playback Friday episode. Unless you're a longtime listener, you likely haven't heard this one yet. And even if you have, I bet you'll get something completely different from it this time around. Welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids. If you ever find yourself stuck about exactly what to say in response to your kids, especially in challenging moments, this episode is for you. My guest is Dr. Adele LaFrance, a clinical psychologist and research scientist with a passion for helping parents support their kids in a way that is informed by the latest developments in neuroscience.
She's also the author of the new book, What to Say to Kids. Kids when nothing seems to work. So in this conversation, Adele's gonna share some of that knowledge with us, including helpful scripts for common parenting scenarios, tips for building understanding and empathy during difficult moments. I know I could use more of that, and insights into why our cultural emotional conditioning often works against us as parents. Okay, now we're gonna get on to our conversation with Adele about what to say to kids when nothing seems to work. Hey Adele, welcome to the podcast. Thank you so much for having me. It's a pleasure to be here. My pleasure to have you. I'm so glad that you reached out to me and You were kind enough to share your book with me, which I can't wait to get into because I just absolutely loved it.
But can you take a few minutes before we do that and just introduce yourself to us? Tell us a little bit about what you do in the world.
Of course, yeah. So I'm a psychologist. I'm originally from Canada and now living, working, practicing in the United States. I have um a history of researching emotion and family based healing um for you know a number of years. So yeah, this book is basically the fruit of many years of putting together uh tips, tricks, scripts for parents who I've met in different contexts who were looking for some concrete strategies to kind of get through the toughest moments at home.
So you just spoke my audience's language, concrete strategies to get through the toughest moments in our home. Yes, that's music to our ears, which again which when I got your email and then I had a chance to look at your book, I read it very quickly. I get a lot of books, but I really flew through your book and I wrote right back to you and I said, We need to bring you on the show. So your new book is called What to Say to Kids When Nothing Seems to Work. So So, you know, you just said you've been collecting these tips and tricks and scripts. Tell us a little bit more about why you really wanted to get this book out there and then what you do in the book.
Thanks. Um so I well I've worked as a psychologist for over a decade now and mostly with parents of kids who were struggling in one way or another. So I've worked in the school system and pediatric rehab and hospital settings and mental health. And I would try to distill the best of the neuroscience that I was learning into simple tricks. So that parents could bring more calm to the home environment. And over and over again they would say that they'd wish someone had taught them these strategies long before or even in the actual sessions, they would ask me like, write down what you just said. Can you just write that down? And so we thought, okay, we actually need to write a book with all of these things that we write down so often for parents in need.
Um, because they really work and they don't work all of the time.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–5:04
2
What is the purpose of Dr. Adele Lafrance’s new book for parents?
5:04–9:49
3
How does Dr. Lafrance explain the “bridge‑building” step in her parenting script?
9:49–16:42
4
What specific script does she suggest for a child who says “I hate reading”?
16:42–21:23
5
How can parents apply the “but → because” strategy in everyday conflicts?
21:23–25:37
6
What script does Dr. Lafrance offer for kids resisting online schoolwork?
25:37–31:40
7
How does she address perfectionist children who receive a “terrible” grade?
31:40–34:26
8
Where can parents find additional resources and connect with Dr. Lafrance online?
34:26–35:17
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
TPP 266a: A Conversation with Poet and Advocate LeDerick Horne
TPP 522: A Whole Child Approach to ADHD with Phil Boucher, M.D.
TPP 091a: A Conversation With Steve Silberman About His Book “Neurotribes”
TPP 521: A Conversation with Dr. Peter Gray About Restoring Childhood
TPP 253a: Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks
TPP 520: Dr. Özgür Bolat on Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science of Motivating Kids