TPP 213: How to Talk to Kids When the World Feels Like a Scary Place

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What is the purpose of Dr. Abigail Gewirtz’s new book and why is it timely?

Abigail Gewirtz 0:00
So we tend to deal with emotions in a variety of different ways, often depending on, you know, who we are and how we've been brought up. So um we certainly have parents who really talk about kids' feelings, but we also have parents who unknowingly, you know, they say, There, there, don't worry, there's nothing to worry about. And the message that gives to kids is My emotions aren't important signals. Or their things to be sort of brushed under the carpet?
Debbie Reber 0:29
Welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids. I'm happy to be bringing you an important conversation for our current moment. I'm talking to the author of the new book When the World Feels Like a Scary Place, Essential Conversations for Anxious Parents and Worried Kids. And it seems like it's the exact right book for this exact time in the world. I wanted to have a very practical and helpful conversation about how to handle those sometimes difficult but important conversations we are all no doubt having more than usual right now, or are perhaps wanting to have with our kids, but we don't know where to start or what to say.
Debbie Reber 1:14
Because we as parents and caregivers often have our own emotions and anxieties surrounding scary, uncertain, and unsettling current events. making it really difficult to know how to both broach and be in those conversations with our kids. That's why I'm happy to bring to the show Dr. Abigail Gowerz, a child psychologist, mother of four, and a leading expert on families under stress. Abigail is also a professor in the Department of Family Social Science and the Institute of Child Development at the University of Minnesota, where she has devoted her career to developing and testing award-winning skills-based parenting programs that promote children's research. Resilience. I was able to preview a copy of Abigail's book and I can tell you it is truly full of examples of essential conversations, as in actual scripts with dialogue, talking points, and prompts that are age appropriate and centered around different issues.
Debbie Reber 2:11
In our conversation, Dr. Gobertz explains the reasons why it's essential to have these conversations, how to make sure your own anxiety doesn't get in the way, and what simple thing to do each day to facilitate more open and thoughtful conversations with our kids. And now here is my conversation with Dr. Kwarts. Hello, Abi, welcome to the podcast. Thank you,
Abigail Gewirtz 2:39
Debbie. It's a pleasure to be with you.
Debbie Reber 2:42
Well, your book kind of landed in my lap at the perfect time and you know, your book is published through Workman as well, which is who did differently wired. And so I know your publicist, and she sent me a note and I was like, Oh my goodness, this is the book that all parents need right now. So I'm so excited to get into all of it. And before we do that, I always ask my guests to just take a minute to do their own introduction. introduction. I've already read your your formal bio, but just take a few minutes to introduce yourself and what you do in the world.
Abigail Gewirtz 3:14
Thank you, Debbie. Well I am a mamma four, and My kids are older. My youngest is seventeen years old, my oldest is twenty six. It's hard to even say that. But like every other parent. We my husband and I gave birth and no one had told us what to do. Um, I happened to have a professional advantage, which was that I was a psychologist by training, but that conferred no personal advantage in bringing up our kids. And and it was a thrilling it it c still is a thrilling and exciting ride and sometimes an impossible ride and it It's really the best job I've ever had. Um and when in about the mid two thousands, two thousand fifteen, two thousand sixteen, I began to notice referrals to my private practice. Increase
Abigail Gewirtz 4:02
Specifically With anxious children and very anxious parents. I began to sort of look around and think about the state of the world and I was doing more international work as well. And I looked at the numbers and I just saw skyrocketing increases in anxiety and depression among kids.

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