TPP 406: Parent Lean-In: How Do I Talk With My Child About a New Autism Diagnosis?

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Unknown 0:00
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Debbie Reber 0:29
I'm Debbie Reber, and welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids. And this is a Parent Lean-In Episode, a bite-sized show where I answer a single listener question, sometimes on my own, sometimes with a coach from the Differently Wired Club, and sometimes with an author or expert who's become one of my go-to resources. Think one relatable Parent question followed by practical strategies or reframes that can support you in your parenting world. To submit a question for a future parent lean-in show, go to tiltparenting.com slash lean in. That's tiltparenting.com slash L-E-A-N-I-N. And with that, here's today's episode.
Debbie Reber 1:17
Hey everybody. Joining me for today's Parent Lean In episode is educator and friend of the pod, Zach Morris of Alive at Learn. Zach specializes in working with parents and young adults who are navigating the complex dynamics of neurodivergent experience. Zach is uniquely equipped to serve families with profiles of autism, especially PDA. families navigating trauma and families needing to heal and repair relationships. He's also a parent coach in my differently wired club. And I just have to say you have true fans in my club. Your office I recall is the one they're like, I'm not missing that thing. So anyway, I'm so happy to to be in conversation with you today for this question. Thank you so much.
Zach Morris 2:00
Oh, thanks, Debbie. That's so nice to hear and and thanks for having me. Happy. All
Debbie Reber 2:04
right, well, let's get into this question. So this is another good one that I think comes up in some shape or form with so many families in our community.

What is the listener’s question about sharing an autism diagnosis with a 10‑year‑old?

Debbie Reber 2:14
So this parent wrote, How do I talk with my child and let them know they've been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder? What is the correct way to talk about someone who's autistic, especially when kids in this country use the word autistic to put each other down. So this is um a little context. This is a ten year old who is comfortable saying that he's neurodivergent, he has ADHD and anxiety and feels comfortable with those, but this parent has recently moved to a new country where autism isn't as well understood or can be used in a negative way. He got reevaluated and both the psychologist and psychiatrist gave that diagnosis, which feels accurate to the parent, yet this parent feels nervous nervous to tell him this one more thing about who he is.
Debbie Reber 3:03
The parent I should also add is is also a little concerned about the best way to share this with other people. So a lot in that question. And Zach, I'm gonna have you kick us off today. What came up for you when you heard that question?
Zach Morris 3:20
Yeah, you know, I I I hear families talk about this a lot, actually. And a lot of a lot of different things are coming up for me. The the first thing I'm thinking about is just just how we talk about autism, right? And and and what autism is, right? And and I love Donna Henderson and Sarah Whalen's work in um Is This Autism? And um so So paraphrasing here, but this is from them, right? In this this idea that at its core it's a different nervous system. Right. Like being autistic is is just having a different nervous system. And it's uh you know, in a nervous system that processes, experiences, and responds to the world differently. than other nervous systems, right? And so so just sort of you know, really starting to get into this conversation around neurotypes, you know, and there just being, you know, m multiple neurotypes, many neurotypes.
Zach Morris 4:16
And and I think especially because kiddo is comfortable with the term neurodivergent, right? It's it's great that neurodivergent just being that sort of umbrella term, right?

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