TPP 509: Martina Nova on What Couples Get Wrong About Parenting Alignment
episode
Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
40 min
1 speaker
7 chapters
transcribed 1 hour ago
Transcript
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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I'm Debbie Reber, and this is Full Tilt Parenting. Today, we are talking about such an important topic, something that can really make or break our parenting experience. And that is how we align with our partners when we're raising our neurodivergent kids. So I'd brought onto the show, Martina Nova. She's a registered clinical counselor and the founder of NovaCare Therapy. She works with individuals and couples navigating trauma, ADHD, attachment patterns, and the emotional complexity of family life. And she has a new book out called Same Page Parenting. Align with your partner to raise the best kid. And I really loved Martina's book because I get asked about this stuff all the time. What do I do to get my partner on the same page?
And how can we really develop more of an alignment and consistency in how we navigate all the tricky bits of parenting our kids? So her book offers a practical framework for helping couples move out of blame and into more honest, connected conversations. So today, Martina and I are going to explore what gets in the way of alignment from our own histories and fears to the added layers of neurodivergent parenting. And we'll talk about navigating differences around discipline, digital habits, and decision making, and what it actually takes to stay connected as our kids grow into adulthood. What I loved about Martina's book so much is that it shares very thoughtful questions and practical strategies that are designed specifically to help couples better understand each other's perspective and build a more intentional, collaborative approach to parenting.
So this is powerful stuff. I highly recommend you have a listen, have your partner listen if they are open to listening and get the conversation started. So here's Martina Nova on Same Page Parenting. Hey, Martina, welcome to the podcast. Hey, Debbie, thank you so much for having me. Thank you for joining me to talk about your new book, which I really enjoyed. I should have saved all of my gushing for after I hit record. I was just telling you before we started how much I... enjoyed it and just thought it's such a unique book in this space and really important. So let me just not bury the lead. Listeners, we're going to be talking about Martina's new book called Same Page Parenting, Align with Your Partner to Raise the Best Kid.
It's such an important topic. I get questions all the time about how do I get on the same page with my partner. So I'm excited to get into it. But I would love to hear a little bit about your story and why you came to write this book in the first place.
Absolutely. Thank you so much for asking. So I wrote it for a few different reasons. I'd probably say one of the first reasons that I wrote the book is, so I'm a clinical counselor and I work a lot with couples and individuals and young parents, but I also work with couples who have teenagers and even individuals who have adult children. And one thing that I noticed that kept coming up is even in my work with couples, we would have arguments or we would have disagreements about things that seem to be about specific topics in the here and now. But since I'm a trauma therapist, I would oftentimes slow things down and try to peel back the layers and say, okay, why does this feel so big for us right now?
What is Same Page Parenting and why did Martina write it?
What was it like for you growing up this particular topic? How were you dealt with when it came to trauma? X, Y, Z topics. And therefore, what was interesting that I found is so many couples don't have conversations about a lot of things that aren't just things like what kind of formula are we going to buy for our baby? Or what time do we wake up at night to feed our baby?
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–3:47
2
What is Same Page Parenting and why did Martina write it?
3:47–9:37
3
How do childhood histories and fears block parenting alignment?
9:37–13:55
4
What practical framework does the book use to create weekly check‑ins?
13:55–22:24
5
How does neurodivergence in parents and kids amplify alignment challenges?
22:24–28:59
6
Why does people‑pleasing become ‘parent‑pleasing’ and how does it affect kids?
28:59–35:50
7
What conversations should couples have about digital habits and sharing kids online?
35:50–40:03
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
TPP 266a: A Conversation with Poet and Advocate LeDerick Horne
TPP 522: A Whole Child Approach to ADHD with Phil Boucher, M.D.
TPP 091a: A Conversation With Steve Silberman About His Book “Neurotribes”
TPP 521: A Conversation with Dr. Peter Gray About Restoring Childhood
TPP 253a: Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks
TPP 520: Dr. Özgür Bolat on Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science of Motivating Kids