This episode will hopefully give you an epiphany! Negative feedback loops have a huge impact on intimate relationships and close, long-term relationships. They are also a major factor in self-perception: your perception of your life and what others mean to you. So much of a long-term, intimate relationship is based on a receipt of signals that in turn create new return signals. We are very habituated to specific interpretations of another person based on our perception of their signals. There are two selves we inhabit: the “whole self” and the “fear self”. These two selves make very different decisions and they act from very different places. The fear self will come from a place of child-born powerlessness where the motive is always to grasp for control and “fix it.” This self operates from a fictional and dysfunctional belief that it is possible and also our job to fix things. The whole self comes from truth. That self knows where the boundary between self and other stands. The whole self can detach with love when necessary and also see when they need to be accountable and give more. The goal is to always act from the whole self and also give love unconditionally. This episode has tools to get to that wholness and also restore the love that gets eroded by negative feedback loops – the ones that occur when both parties are reacting from fear and a misinterpretation of the other person’s cues. SENDING LOVE!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ask this episode

“What did the council decide on item 42?” — answered with the speaker and the moment.

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