I Can’t Believe These Are Real: 15 Dating App Openers Men Actually Sent to Women
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What are some mortifying dating app openers men have sent?
You know what?
How can an insult opener surprisingly get a response?
You know what goes really well with eggnog?
What makes a dating app opener truly genius?
Being with my family, Christmas carols, asking a stranger for oral sex.
All right, welcome back to the How to Get a Girlfriend podcast.
Which one-word message is considered cringeworthy?
I'm your host, dating coach, bestselling author, Conal Barrett. I'm a dating coach.
What is the secret to writing charming openers?
I'm here to help you attract your dream girlfriend and do it by being authentic.
How does authenticity play a role in dating app openers?
No sketchy pickup moves needed here.
What are some examples of 'meh' openers and why do they fail?
This is about dating with authenticity. And I have a special treat for you today. I'm going to do a change of pace. I want to make you laugh.
What techniques can elevate a dating opener to be more effective?
I want to make you cringe. And I want to give you some really good online dating openers as well. I'm going to give you 15 different online dating openers. And I'm going to put them in one of three categories. These are real openers that I have read recently that And I'm going to put them in one of three categories, sort of like the good, the bad, and the ugly. I'm calling it some are magnificent, some are meh, and some are downright mortifying. And what made me want to do this episode is a few days ago, I'm looking at online dating openers from men, and I found one among others that made me cringe. This guy on Tinder said, sent this to a woman he wrote if you lost five to ten pounds you'd be perfect
That made me go, yikes. That is amazing that a guy actually had the cojones and crassness to send that to a woman. So I'm going to take 15 openers that I found and put them into these three buckets. Some are meh, some are magnificent, some are mortifying. And I think you're going to get a really good kick out of this. And you might even get a couple that you'll want to use. So here we go. 15 let's go in no particular order. Here's the first one. Okay, this guy wrote, let's start with the one I just gave you. If you lost like five to 10 pounds, you would be perfect. Mortifying. I'll categorize that as mortifying. Basically, if he gained five to 10 IQ points, then he would never would have sent that opener.
It's like when I read that, I thought, what did he expect her to say? Oh my God, thanks. Negging is my love language. When's our wedding? It felt and smacked like that old school negging technique that you might have heard about. Here's what she wrote back, by the way. She wrote back, does insulting women on dating apps usually work well for you? Genuinely curious. Oh, by the way, if you want to see these openers and the responses from some women, I'll be posting these on my Instagram. Dating transformation. Okay, let's go to the next one. This is a pretty interesting one. Check this one out. Here is the next opener. Again, real opener is written by real men, real guys. His opener is, actually, let me read this one.
Okay, so he starts this way. Generic greeting with a smiley face. So he writes generic greeting with a big smiley face. She writes typical response. Then he writes suggestive remark. She counters with defensive rebuttal. Then he writes quick and desperate backpedal. She writes diversion. He writes half-hearted compliment. She writes cognitive dissonance. And so I wanted to give you the whole opening salvo here. This opener, specifically, generic greeting. This might be the best two-word opener I've ever seen. It's brilliant. Because whoever wrote this, it wasn't me. I wish it was me. But credit where credit's due. It's brilliant because it's a role play, which women love. But it also hits at a deeper truth, which is that most openers are generic.
Every woman can relate to that. So this girl, this woman is thinking, finally a self-aware guy who gets it and who's fun. It's like if How's Your Day was Checkers, this opener is 4D chess. So feel free to give that a try. It's a bit meta, but women who like a little meta self-aware humor, man, I think this will work well. Okay, moving on. The next one is a shocking one word opener. It's simply head question mark. And what makes this even more shocking, cringeworthy is I'm just finding the screenshot here. Head question mark as in head question. And she writes back, I'm literally the most DTF chick on this app, but you need to at least say hello first.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What are some mortifying dating app openers men have sent?
0:00–0:01
2
How can an insult opener surprisingly get a response?
0:01–0:04
3
What makes a dating app opener truly genius?
0:04–0:20
4
Which one-word message is considered cringeworthy?
0:20–0:25
5
What is the secret to writing charming openers?
0:25–0:30
6
How does authenticity play a role in dating app openers?
0:30–0:32
7
What are some examples of 'meh' openers and why do they fail?
0:32–0:42
8
What techniques can elevate a dating opener to be more effective?
0:42–22:01
Speakers
2 identifiedMore from How to Get a Girlfriend with Connell Barrett
7 Texting Mistakes that Make Women Flake Before the First Date (and 7 Easy Fixes)
8 Flirty Things to Say (and Not to Say) When You Freeze Up Around Women
The 10 Most Surprisingly Sexy Things to Say on a First Date
The 7 Lies that Keep You From Approaching—and 7 Tips to Confidently Talk to Women Anywhere
The 10 Texting Commandments: How to Stop Getting Ghosted and Start Getting Dates
21 Flirty Ways to Make Her Feel Authentic Attraction (How to Escape the Friend Zone, Part 2)