The acute loneliness of moms
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What does loneliness look like for moms?
I don't know how to build space to be a person beyond just being with my kids anymore. And I never saw that for me. I am going to be honest, I have never felt lonelier. And being around other mothers, I can tell that we were all struggling in isolation and it sucks.
That was Ashley Ludwinski, Tayana Teal, Natalie Crowley, and Yasmeen Baroon. You'll hear more from them throughout the episode. But to break it all down, I'm joined by Jessica Groves, New York Times opinion writer and author of the book Screaming on the Inside, The Unsustainability of American Motherhood. So happy to be here.
Why are moms feeling lonely in today's society?
And associate professor and parental burnout researcher at Ohio State University, Kate Golick.
Thank you so much for having us.
Kate and Jessica are experts, like their jobs are to talk to moms. And they're also both moms themselves. So they're here to tell me why moms are so lonely and what we can do to alleviate mom loneliness. To start, Kate, you have four kids and you told my producer Liam that you've experienced some of this mom loneliness firsthand. What did it look like for you?
Oh, yes, absolutely. It was probably the worst with my first. I had a daughter, and I was the first out of my family, out of my friends, you know, to have kids. And so nobody could really relate to me. And I think, you know, it's your first time around anyway, so you're kind of navigating that role change and that, you know, major life change. And I will say that those first six months were so hard. I didn't have any mom friends. I didn't really know any of the resources yet that were available. And I remember one of my friends saying to me, you need to find some mommy friends. And I was like, I don't know how.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What does loneliness look like for moms?
3:03–3:49
2
Why are moms feeling lonely in today's society?
3:49–6:40
3
What role do societal expectations play in mom loneliness?
6:40–8:27
4
How can moms build supportive friendships?
8:27–10:56
5
What challenges do moms face when trying to connect?
10:56–12:45
6
Why is asking for help difficult for moms?
12:45–15:10
7
How does having a special needs child impact feelings of loneliness?
15:10–16:09
8
What structural issues contribute to mom loneliness?
16:09–19:40