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Chapter 1: What annoys people about ATM line behavior?
Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay. What I've had it with is people that have no urgency in the ATM line. So there's like five cars rolled up waiting on the ATM and the ATM person dicks around with their card. They don't just get their money and put it in the cart. They want to put it in their wallet, make sure it's all organized, count their money. I'm just like...
The machine's going to give you the money. Move on down the road. If you have an issue, you're going to have to go in the bank anyway. Go, go, go, go, go. There are five people in line. Have some urgency and some self-awareness. It's not the time to clean out your wallet while you're sitting at the ATM machine. I've had it.
You know, I think a lot of people don't take into account the feelings of the people behind them in line. And you see this all the time. It could be at a restaurant. You have the register congestors that we've talked about and identified as a huge problem in Trump's America. And then now we have the ATM congestors. And I've experienced the same thing. I'm like, you have to get in and out.
And then when you get your cash or your receipt or whatever, then you move up. Right. And when you're not hindering anybody's ability to access the coveted machine, then you can organize your own things. But I agree, there's a lot of lollygagging and pussyfooting going on at the ATM.
It's the worst. My dad, when he was alive, he was the worst at this. One time I went to the ATM with him. He pulled out his wallet. He puts the card in. He's dicking around. He puts his wallet back in. It was five to seven minutes. And I just looked at him and I said, Every single person in this blind and every single person in this bank hates your guts. It's just chaos at these ATMs.
People are just rude. And inefficient. I mean, people as a species are inefficient. You can see it at the airport, at the ATM. Anytime you have a crowd of people, it's mass inefficiency. Absolutely.
I also think some of it is regional because when I go to New York City or London, people that live in big cities learn to be efficient. They learn to be a member of a fine-tuned machine where millions of people live in the same place at the same time and they seem to be more efficient.
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Chapter 2: How do regional attitudes affect social efficiency?
I would say where we live, it's like this breathtaking inefficiency and this feeling like I'm the only person on the planet At this ATM machine, I have found the people in New York to be more genuinely courteous than people in Oklahoma. And this is a lot of people think, oh, people in the South are so friendly. Well, it's all a facade.
The Southern friendliness is like a smoke and mirror show because it's just for the sake of doing it. There's nothing genuine behind it. In New York, if somebody genuinely is prohibiting you from going to point A to point B or they're taking a long time, they turn around and go, I'm so sorry I took so long. Right. It's not this faked feigned smile.
It's just a very direct, I'm so sorry I took so long. And then they turn around and scoot off. In Oklahoma, somebody could be like, I'm so sorry I took so long. And then walk up and go, well, boy, weren't his panties in a lot.
You know, there's a lack of like, and I've found in smaller cities like ours, the narcissism of I'm the only customer in the universe seems to be more pronounced than in larger cities.
I can agree with that because I was sitting here trying to imagine the people in this city trying to navigate the subway. They couldn't do it. Well, I mean, no. And let's discuss what's the common denominator between These people in our community, inefficiency, lack of self-awareness, fakeness. Oh, I can tell you. Okay. Lay it on me. The MAGA voters. Yep.
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. MAGA voters. Okay. Let me tell you what I've had it with. I've had it with hypochondriacs. That is not new. Specifically my husband. Poor Josh. And so, you know, about a month ago, Josh starts in like... I think there's something wrong with my brain. And I'm like, what, what's going on with your brain? Sometimes I just, I can't really remember stuff.
Sometimes I don't feel like I'm as sharp as I was. And I said, brain fog. He's no, it's more than that. It's more than that. I've been on chat GPT, which he calls chat GPS. I've been on chat GPS and I just think it's more than that. Um, so then he starts and I go like, Josh, I'm not going down this road with you. I'm not like you're aging. Um, And brain fog is a symptom of middle age.
And that's what I think you have around you all the time. He's like, I think I have dementia. I'm like, you don't have dementia. You know what time it is. You know where you are. There's no problem here. But when Josh gets an idea in his head, he is hellbent on confirming said idea. So naturally, he books a CT scan of his brain. Right. Of course.
So he goes straight to the neurologist and gets his brain scanned, much to my surprise, much to his surprise. There's not a goddamn thing wrong with his brain. But this reminded me, and of course, I just wouldn't, I wouldn't, I'm, again, I'm more Nurse Ratched than I am Nurse Nightingale because I live with a hypochondriac.
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Chapter 3: What challenges come with living with a hypochondriac?
So he immediately books an appointment with an ENT. Of course. And he goes to the ENT and they pull out just gobs and gobs of wax. And he goes, I knew there was something wrong with me. So he tries to equate this fake personal dementia diagnosis with somehow being related to excess earwax. We're talking, I mean, there was a couple of days there where he's on the sofa claiming he can't hear. Yeah.
He's on the sofa claiming that he can't hear. And then we're leaving for Brazil and he's putting all these drops in his ears. And Josh doesn't do anything. Like if the prescription says put one drop per day, he's going to put 20 drops per day. So he's putting these drops in his ear and I go, what's going on? He goes, I've been to the ENT twice.
They've cleaned out my ears, but I can't hear anything. Nobody will do anything about it.
He does not say that.
You're lying. Looks me dead in the eye and says, nobody will do anything about it. proceeds to put three more sets of drop in his ears on our way to the airport. And we get to the airport and he's like, my ear just feels like it's clogged. I go, because you've been cramming ear drops in it. All day. So then I asked chat GPS, what happens if you put too many drops in your ears?
And it's exactly the symptoms that Josh is describing to me. Pump the brakes on the air drops. We're about to get on a 12-hour flight to Sao Paulo. Pull yourself together. So of course he does. He pulls himself together. And I see him doing this with his ear quite a bit and stuff, but I think we're past it. But I'm just telling you, he is a total hypochondriac and it drives me bananas.
You know, it's interesting because I think it's so funny because I just don't see him as a hypochondriac. Well, he is. No, I know. I mean, I went in and I saw him that morning on the sofa and I was like, is it the earwax problem? Yeah. And I said, what's wrong with Josh? And you said, he's got earwax. I was like, he's on the fucking couch because he's got earwax.
And you're like, oh, no, he's going back today. He's got a twofer. Yeah. Two in two days. Yeah. Two clean outs.
You know, that ENT guy is like, this guy is a lunatic. That poor pulmonologist. Oh, poor thing. Was forced into the asthma diagnosis and forced into a COPD diagnosis. You know, he'd been up there. He demanded that she do. He had his lungs injected with some sort of dye. Right. So that he could have some exam where the lung lights up. Seriously. And you know he just keeps going.
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Chapter 4: What is the story behind the 'Head Beaver in Charge' nickname?
Women are in positions of power all over the place. They don't have religion. in these places. And I just think that the way we have set up the United States, multiple ways, city planning, you have to drive your car everywhere. I think that suburbia is death trap for happiness factor.
I think if your house looks like everybody else's house and everybody kind of lives the same way, does all the same stuff, I think that's dreadfully boring and that would make you unhappy. I think all the Trump dump and having a president that has a goddamn flea market, that's depressing as shit. So I don't know how we reverse course, but I mean, it's, I see it.
I find myself being more, I wouldn't say depressed, but depressed. Since the election, every day I wake up with this foreboding, like what's happened? And then I'm never like, oh, nothing happened last night, or nobody broke the law last night, or nobody leaked war plans on the internet, that kind of thing. So I do just have an unease that I have never had before.
You know, when we were in Brazil, I was – first of all, I was like, oh, my God, like 23 million people live in this city. That was crazy because when you're in the United States, all you ever hear about is U.S.-centered news. But I was thinking about just returning to the United States.
And before this trip, when I was abroad and I returned to the United States, I knew that I was returning to a place that at least I believed in trying to get better with time each year, each presidential term, trying our best to improve things. And this time, as I woke up that morning to board the plane, I was like, I'm going back to a place where the people in charge are hell bent.
on tearing it down and they're hell bent on any advancement that women have made, any advancement that the LGBTQ plus community has made. They're completely erasing black identity from all of the government websites. So all the civil rights advancements, they want to completely undo. And that's just, it was just, it hit me like a ton of bricks thinking I'm returning to a place
That is no longer the place for 50 years that I needed to believe that it was. That this government that's in place right now wants to dismantle all of these things. And here's something that I've had it with. The little Caroline Leavitt, the little White House press secretary, that little cunt. Let me tell you.
She has her job because of women that had a backbone, that fought for everybody, that didn't throw anybody under the bus. That's why she has that job. And the fact that she would join an administration where she would want to take away all of those advancements.
is so disgusting to me the same with that queen at the secretary of the treasury scott besant he has that job because of activists in the lgbtq plus community that fought hard to normalize and to say these people should not be shamed they should not uh they should have all of the laws applied to them so he's going to get to that position and beat down all of those before him and the rights for all of those that come after him
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Chapter 5: What does recent research say about U.S. happiness levels?
I'm always like, what? When I hear Candace Owens open her mouth, Kash Patel's loyalty to Trump, Caroline Leavitt. I mean, she grosses me out worse than Kaylee Ann McEnany. Does he have any black people in his cabinet? I think Cash Patel's the darkest person in his cabinet. But does he have like an African-American in his cabinet? I don't think so. Not to my knowledge.
Because remember, he didn't... Tim Scott was pick me, pick me, pick me. He didn't pick him.
Yeah.
But that's not shocking at all.
No, it doesn't. It doesn't shock me at all. But it's just... It's really... It's really hurtful to the progress that so many people have made. And, you know, when you study American history and you see the horrible things that happen, like slavery and segregation, and then you study the civil rights movement, you see the brave people that, you know, marched on the bridge.
and Rosa Parks and MLK that did all of these amazing cool things. And you see this administration go and just want to wipe all that out and say, oh, it's just DEI when the people that are calling other people DEI are the most incompetent, stupid, double digit IQ pieces of shit this country's ever produced. They shouldn't be in charge of anything.
They are flea market game show host, rat trap, nut jobs. I've just, it's so gross. It disgusts me each and every day. Could not agree more. Okay. Another news story. Not as uplifting either. I was going to say, we really... The study shows half of Americans have gotten ruder since the pandemic. About 47% of adults say public behavior has worsened with 34% noticing rude behavior in public.
And I'm just going to say, I think this is 100% true.
I completely agree. And this is... I was going to say this last time and we kind of got off track, but... I prefer to eat my meals. Every time I go out to dinner with a group of people, I sit there and think, I wish I was by myself. Because when I'm done, I can get the check. I can go. I can sit down. I can order. I don't have to fucking talk for five hours about what's on the menu.
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Chapter 6: How do politics and social issues impact American happiness?
And then all of a sudden they jump on the oligarch bandwagon and they decide they're going to roll back their DEI support, the support of diversity, equity, inclusion. And The customers of Target, specifically black people, are not to be trifled with. That's right. And they get online and they organize. And Target is feeling this to the tune of $1 billion.
And what I have to say about this is people do not like the short-sighted inauthenticity. I think it's so gross. If you are... Just supporting gay people or black people because you think it's going to be monetarily beneficial for you and not because you feel it's the right thing to do, then you're a target. You just switch your mind with the changes of the political winds.
And I think that's so important. I have always stood in my support of social justice, my support of civil rights, my support of equality, and it's never changed. And right now it's more difficult to express those opinions, but I feel that much more emboldened to do it because of the targets. And I'm not going to be scared of a bunch of men.
in the Trump administration that wear eyeliner and makeup all the time, talking about how alpha they are, trying to bully us into not speaking out against them. It's just insane. And I support people boycotting Target. And shame on Target for being so shallow in their support for civil rights.
Absolutely. And I have boycotted Amazon too, which is a real tough one for me. Because Jeff Bezos, perfect example, he accepted like a human rights award because of his DEI programs with Amazon. And then he turned and fled so fast.
It's just – that's so gross. And you know what? I think that a lot of black people felt that during Black Lives Matter. Right. They felt like it was a trendy bandwagon thing for people to post about. But as soon as the winds changed, you saw –
the you know either overt racism or covert racism come back and that would be exhausting being black in america when it's popular and everybody is all about black lives matter and it's this big movement but i remember some you know seeing it online and some some friends of mine that are black that were like we'll see how long this lasts We'll see how long people really stay new. How gross.
It's so gross. Okay. I believe that that concludes the first part of this podcast. In the second part of America's Top DEI Podcast, we like to hear from you, the listener. Okay.
Up first, we've got Jenny.
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Chapter 7: What trends have emerged in public behavior post-pandemic?
I can't figure out who thinks they're a bigger victim. These two think they are victims. It's unreal. I would die if I was running around with you and you let me always talk about how everybody hates me, dah, dah, dah, dah. And you never said, have you ever thought the common denominator in your problems was you? Have you ever thought maybe you had something to do with that?
This has gone on their entire lives because they have money. It's so crazy what people get away with.
And you cannot forget the color of their skin and their gender. That's right. That's right. White men, really, it's crazy because not all white men. There's a lot of white male listeners of all generations, of Gen Z, millennials, boomers, and Gen Xers that listen to us. And you guys fight the good fight. And we're not talking about you.
But there's this new breed of men from the older sect that were radicalized by Fox News. And then the younger ones radicalized from like the Barstool Sports and Right Wing Manosphere and all of this stuff. And the insecurity in it and the need to constantly... be told that you're okay and you're so good at something is so exhausting.
And I guess they all hang out with each other and they're always on these titty baby websites listening to titty baby podcasts where it's just wah, wah, wah all the time. And I guess that's what makes them feel normal because if I was around, we've had friends, you and I have had friends that play victim all All the time. And eventually I can't be around it anymore.
I cannot listen to somebody's grievances day in and day out. And then it forms to a year and you think, why haven't you done anything to change this?
This might have happened to you, but you are responsible. for how you respond to it. And these men sit there and cry like everybody doesn't like me. The judiciary is against me. The list goes on and on. There's hoaxes and all this stuff. And I just think, does nobody listening think You are a billionaire. You have everything you want. You have more power than you could ever imagine.
Why are you crying around on Fox News all the time? Don't they get sick of that? I would think.
I mean, whenever I hear Elon Musk talk and he's complaining about all of the wrongs that have happened to him or Trump talking about all the wrongs that happened to him, I immediately think in my head, what a pussy. Yes. God, this guy's a titty baby just sitting here bitching and moaning and Poor me. I'm just like, what? It's such a turnoff. And I think, well, doesn't everybody else see that?
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Chapter 8: What was the impact of Target's DEI rollback and boycott?
They are not tough guys at all. All they do is this person did this, this person did that. There's no strength in a whiner. Nobody likes a fucking whiner, I guess, except for MAGA.
And it is the party of whiners. Absolutely. The party of grievances and poor me. I just fucking drives me bananas.
OK.
OK, up next, we've got Kayleigh. OK, I don't know if this is the right way to submit anything, but can I just say I've absolutely fucking had it with how America treats their politicians. Like if we look at MAGA, you have all these people buying merch, buying hats, flags, T-shirts or whatever.
And I'm just there going, you're doing all of this for an elected public servant because that's what Trump is. And I just have to say, like, you wouldn't find the same behavior in Ireland. Like our prime minister, Taoiseach, is Micheál Martin.
If I had cut out some Micheál Martin in my house and the flags up around the place, my roommates would be calling 911 and put me in for a psychiatric evaluation for one. Secondly, it's just like we don't celebritify them. Like, a lot of us would have met our local politicians. We've met them in person.
They're just normal people who are elected to do the job, as most of your Congress or whatever is as well. It's just so weird to me. Yeah, I've had it.
She's 100% right. It's so weird. The MAGA shit is so weird to me. He wears all this makeup and then they make these homoerotic photoshopped things of him. And then he sells all these riffraffs. And I was thinking about, remember that game show, Let's Make a Deal?
Yeah.
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