Jim Norton, Tony Caruso (Adam Ray), Kam Patterson, William Montgomery, Ari Matti, Hans Kim, D Madness, Michael A. Gonzales, Jon Deas, Matthew Muehling, Joe White, Kristie Nova, Yoni, Troy Conrad, Tony Hinchcliffe, Brian Redban - RECORDED– 02/07/2025 TONY HINCHCLIFFE @TONYHINCHCLIFE TONYHINCHCLIFFE.COM BRIAN REDBAN @REDBAN DEATHSQUAD.TV SUNSETSTRIPATX.COM Try VIIA! https://viia.co/TONY and use code TONY Protect your online privacy TODAY by visiting https://expressvpn.com/killtony. Right now get 10% off at https://tecovas.com/killtony when you sign up for email and texts. Download the PRIZEPICKS app today and use code TONY to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup! https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/TONY Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is the introduction of the podcast?
Hey, this is Red Band, and you're listening to the Death Squad Podcast Network. This episode of Kill Tony and every episode of Kill Tony can be found at DeathSquad.TV, Apple, Spotify, and anywhere you get podcasts. Check out TonyHinchcliffe.com for everything The Golden Pony, Tony Hinchcliffe. You can also check out ShopSquad.TV for Death Squad merch, hats, mugs, whatever. ShopSquad.TV.
And now here's a brand new episode of Kill Tony.
Tickets are on sale for all my upcoming stand-up dates. Detroit, Atlantic City, Niagara Falls, Mount Pleasant, Michigan, West Valley City, a.k.a. Salt Lake City, Utah, Reno, Nevada, Anaheim, California, and Las Vegas, Nevada. Tickets are on sale now for my stand-up comedy featuring some of your favorite characters from the show, especially me. All tickets are at TonyHinchcliffe.com right now.
Chapter 2: What upcoming stand-up shows does Tony Hinchcliffe mention?
That's where we are.
Hey, this is Redman, coming to you live from the Comedy Mothership here in Austin, Texas, for a brand new episode of Kill Tony, Get Off of Tony. Let's go!
Who's ready for the best fucking night of their lives, huh?
Hey, everybody! The best damn band in the land, everybody.
Raul Vallejo. Fernando Castillo. Carlos Sosa on the horns. Big Mike. Michael Gonzalez on the drums. The mutilating Matt Muehling on the electric guitar. John Dees on the keys. And that is... Indeed, Dee Madness on the bass guitar, ladies and gentlemen. Wow. The energy in here feels great. Before we get started, here's a little bit more from the amazing sponsors that made it all possible.
Are you guys ready to start tonight's episode? This is Kill Tony, brought to you by Nick Tank, nicotine pouches and ZipRecruiter. Every single week, I have one or two or three of the best possible guests. I look at it like a chemistry set. I know all these people. I know who goes well together and how to mix it. Tonight's two-guest panel is one of the greatest comedians of all time,
and also a guy who's returning back into the comedy business after a very long hiatus. So what a perfect panel. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you two of the greats. Make some fucking noise for Jim Norton and Tony Caruso.
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Chapter 3: Who are the special guests on this episode?
Oh, yeah. Jim Norton. Tony Caruso. First time on Kill Tony. Wow. Tony Caruso, Jim Norton, welcome.
Jim Norton is back, the only comedian to be on both Madison Square Garden episodes, absolutely crushing, one of our favorite guests of all time. Thank you. He's been on this show in L.A., multiple times in Austin, in Las Vegas. Jim Norton, one of the best comedians in the world. Jim Norton Can't Save You is available everywhere. It's a brand new show.
And joining the panel for the very first time ever in the show's entire history, Tony Caruso, ladies and gentlemen. Now, Tony... Wow, they really love you.
I don't know how it's... I don't know what that was. I don't know what that was. I've never shot a gun in my life. It seems like... I've come out on a woman's face, but I've never shot a gun, you know?
You have a giant approval from the audience, and many of them don't know anything about you. You are making your return into stand-up comedy. You took a 20-year hiatus when your wife passed away.
I took a 20-year hiatus. My wife died, R.I.P. I found out through text she had cancer or HPV or some shit. Whatever, the bitch is dead, so... I'm trying to get my life back on track. Good to see you, Redman. What, do you brush your teeth with nacho cheese? All right, I'm just warming up here, but... But, no, I'm a big fan of the show, and, you know, Kill Tony is a show to launch careers.
It launched a lot of people with Hans Kim, you know, who, by the way, is about to star in the all-Asian reboot of The Sandlot. Hans Kim is. He's going to play Squints. It's going to be called The Sand Rot, if you're an Asian guy. All right, I'm warming up here, but... Tony, if you're here, who's haunting the abandoned carnival down the street, huh? I'm warming up here. We're having a good time.
You know, I'm a big fan of Kill Tony. Oh, my God. I've been watching the show on YouTube. I've been watching it on Facebook. I got Twitter. I got X. I got something. I got something on my cock right now. Wow. Hit me. Hit me. Hit me one more time. Not too hard. I got a pacemaker. Tony Caruso. I forgot what it was called.
He's been making his return in his stand-up role.
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Chapter 4: What is Tony Caruso's experience in comedy?
I invite you to the show, and this is how you treat me.
I'm just trying to warm up. Okay. You're doing the show, right? You're warming up. Hey, look at that fat fuck. Okay. I mean, geez. I watch your show. I watch your show. I watch your show. I love it. Big fame. Okay.
Okay, all right. Good Lord almighty. So Tony, you know how this show works. Over 200 people signed up for the opportunity to be here. I pull their name out of the bucket. They get 60 seconds. You know their time is up and you're the sound of a kitten. That means they have to wrap it up then or else they bring out the angriest Hollywood bear, which interrupts them.
And then I ask them a bunch of questions. We find out more about them and everything is improvised. Anything can happen. Are you guys ready to start tonight's episode? Ladies and gentlemen, your first comedian performing tonight while we go wrangle your first bucket pool is a guy who's been on the show only one other time in Las Vegas, Nevada at Skank Fest.
He was my favorite comedian on the episode. And I told him that when he arrives to Austin, Texas for his first time, that he gets an automatic spot on this show. This is that show. This is that moment. Ladies and gentlemen, your first comedian, 60 seconds uninterrupted. for the second time ever appearance of Peter Angelo, everybody. Here we go. It's Peter Angelo.
What's going on, guys? What's going on? Who here likes rough sex? Who here likes rough sex with men? Just me? All right, cool. Yeah, I fuck a lot of dudes. It's weird. I get it. I look like this. But I do, I enjoy rough sex, but the problem is I date guys who are way smaller than me. And people think I do that to throw them around like it's Cirque du Soleil. That's not the case.
I want them to be the dominant one. Let them be in charge. But for rough sex to be hot, there's gotta be that element of danger. I don't feel like I'm in danger. The average weight of the guys I sleep with is 150 pounds. I weigh 320. They can't even get their hands around my neck. For me to feel like they were in charge, I had to give them a weapon. And I'm not sucking dick at gunpoint. Again.
It's a great family reunion. You think the natural solution is I be the dominant one, you know, I be in charge, but like, I'm afraid I'm so much bigger, I'm gonna kill them, and now I'm like gay Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Like, I didn't mean to kill the twink boy George, I just wanted to pet his butt. Thanks, guys. I'm Peter Angelo.
Peter Angelo. Second ever time on the show. Famously the least gay-looking gay man ever in the show's history. Jim, you ever see anything like this before?
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Chapter 5: What comedic styles do the guests bring?
Are you like looking at a porno mag and you're like, me just like dick or something like that?
I think so. Honestly, you know, the internet was coming around. I just started typing in gay and just wanted to check it out. I was like, maybe this is for me.
What was the first thing you saw that you were like, oh, how do I get to do that, you know? a butthole.
Yeah. That's what he saw and he wanted to do that. A feminine man and I was like, all right, yes, that. And then just moved on from there.
How do you go to your parents and you go, hey, how do I get more buttholes in my life?
My dad was like, become a trucker. Truck stops.
When did your parents find out you were gay? How did they know? When do you think they caught on?
Um, I'm not sure, because I would say, not that I told them they weren't positive. My brother knew right away, because he kept taking my computer before I could erase the search history.
Oh, shit. And your brother's like, let me send this email to Google real quick, because my account got hacked. What the fuck is that black guy fucking that other black guy for?
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Chapter 6: How does Ahsan Ahmad's joke about Hamas create controversy?
A lot of metal concerts, go to raves sometimes. I'm training to be a pro wrestler. Really? Yeah. Wow.
That's the right profession for you.
Stone Cold Steve Aidsy over here. Yeah, man. It hasn't kicked in yet. What's your wrestling character? It's Big Doom.
Wow. The cock. I'm a gay trucker who hates straight people.
Okay, so it's pretty... Pretty much just me.
Do we get to find out what you're transporting? You said you drive trucks, right? So what are you taking across daylight? What are you taking from... Are we talking about my character or what I actually did as a trucker? Can I finish my fucking sentence for a second? So you're a real truck driver, right? I was, yeah. So you were, yeah. So what were you driving in the truck?
If you were taking a truck from Austin to Dallas, what would be in the truck?
Steel pipe.
Wow.
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Chapter 7: What unique perspective does Frank DeMint share?
He had to bend over about a foot, because I'm only five foot six. And he goes, the other thing I know about you little Italian bastards is you're all criminals. And I swear to God, I would have cooked this guy's ass if I wasn't a felon.
26.
26. Where are you from? Kentucky. Okay. And are you visiting here? You still live in Kentucky?
I live here. Okay. I've been here for six months.
How long have you lived? Six months. Yes, sir.
And what do you do for work? I work at a bar over on East 6th. Okay. What do you do at the bar? I am a lowly doorman. A doorman. I check IDs.
Okay. Very interesting. And how long have you been doing stand-up?
About a year and a half.
A year and a half. And you've lived here for six months. Yes. You think that's your best minute that you just did? I thought so. Okay.
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Chapter 8: What does Jake Kennedy do for a living?
Yeah, he was right.
Yeah. He was right. It ended up working out.
You're so funny, man. That fucking, making that stuff funny, that is fucking great. Really, it's so odd. I love the angle you took. To hear a Jew say that.
Hamaz al-Tab is going to be my new catchphrase. We go halfsies on it, but that's great. You can have it. It's yours. You're a legend. Okay, great. All right. You guys heard it. It was really funny. You're very sharp, very quick. I like the pace. Yeah, it's great. Thank you. Thank you.
Hassan, always killing it, always part of the actual scene here. I mean, the equivalent to a high-level comedy story. Paid regular. You are the equivalent to here. One of the first people from L.A. to move here with your homie and podcast co-host, Derek Poston, who we all love. You've actually been the one man panel on an episode in 2022.
I've been on the panel three times, but I had this Israel-Palestine joke, and I was like, it's the perfect time to drop it. I'll sign up for Kill Tony and see what happens.
I love it when my buddies sign up for the show and are lucky enough to get pulled out of the bucket. Happened with Matt Edgar a few weeks ago, and now you. What else is going on in life, Hasan? What have you been learning? You're kind of like, how long have you been doing this? Ooh, 12 years. 12 years, and that's at a comedy store level. You are a former comedy store door guy.
Oh, yeah. I started working when this show was in the belly room. The one thing I noticed is that the people who do poorly on this show always ask the audience how they're doing. So I was like, when I get up here, just start the joke. You only have a minute. Why waste the time? Exactly.
You are absolutely correct. How does your hair go like that? Yeah.
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