Episode 608: The Tragedy of the Batavia Part IV - My Boss Is Gonna Kill Me!

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What events lead to the cannibalism on the Batavia?

Unknown Speaker 3 0:09
That's when the cannibalism started.
Henry Zebrowski 0:20
Yeah, that's how I like to start. Oh, yeah, man. That's how I like to start. I can't wait for this episode. I love a happy ending. This is going to be so, I'm so excited. I like when everyone's just great, but I can never, it's all filled with kisses.
Unknown Speaker 3 0:33
The best part about this is the very, very end. When they do the flash mob together, forgiveness is our favorite word.
Henry Zebrowski 0:42
One of my favorites.
Marcus Parks 0:43
And then all the mutineers do the thriller dance at the same time. Oh, yeah.
Henry Zebrowski 0:47
Slum Dutch millionaire, man. Oh.
Unknown Speaker 3 0:51
welcome to the last podcast on the left ladies and gentlemen my name is marcus parks i'm here with henry zabrowski justice fed justice fed i am filled with justice what'd you do how did you who'd you declare it on not in real life oh okay just in this story oh and for me justice for me yeah justice for henry did you win an argument with your wife no That's the funny, a funny idea. That's a funny idea. No, no, I'm just, this story, this ending is probably my favorite part of it. It's fucking awesome.
Henry Zebrowski 1:29
I love it so much. How's the nutmeg? You guys been using it in your various nogs? Every day. I want to say thank you.
Unknown Speaker 3 1:36
To Gurney today, did you receive? I did. They were fantastic. Gurney made us a commemorative for the end of the Batavia series, nutmeg macarons. Oh, I feel bad. She asked me if I got my macarons.
Henry Zebrowski 1:50
I was like, I don't want it. And I didn't know it was, I thought they were just macarons here. I didn't know she made special Batavian ones.
Unknown Speaker 3 1:55
Yeah, you insensitive clod. Oh, man. You classless simpleton. God damn it. I'll boof it later. Yeah, you can put it back. I will say, I've never eaten nutmeg macaron. I haven't either. How was it? Nutmeggy. It was delicious. It was Christmassy. Very tasty. She did a great job.
Marcus Parks 2:15
Yeah. And we have the future boofer, Ed Larson. How you doing?
Unknown Speaker 3 2:18
Stick it up there.
Henry Zebrowski 2:19
We'll see you in a little while.
Unknown Speaker 3 2:21
Tell me, Eddie, did you actually, did you get your shipment track for the yay shirt? Because when I looked at my order and they're saying that my yay, my new yay shirt is going to be fucking delayed by like a month and a half. Oh, I didn't know you got me one. I just went ahead and made my own.
Henry Zebrowski 2:40
I got a bunch of electrical tape in. Put some flourish on it.
Marcus Parks 2:46
Now, on our last episode, we took you on a journey through the nightmare world created by Euronymous Cornelius and his band of brutes on the islands where upper merchant Pelsart left the survivors of the Batavia to live or die by the whims of fortune. Nice. But if you'll join us as we go all the way back to the end of episode two. Upper Merchant Pelsart had a journey of his own ahead of him, as he still had to go to Java to request help for the survivors, but more importantly as far as he was concerned, Pelsart also had to report to the VOC on the full extent of just how badly he'd fucked up. So today, before we return to the battle between the so-called defenders and the evil hordes of Euronymous Cornelis, let's rejoin Upper Merchant Pelsart and Captain Jakobs for their trip to Java.
Unknown Speaker 3 3:34
Yeah. I just love the word Java. Java. It's beautiful. The more we say it, because it's also... You never say it. Java. Nice hot cup of Java. It's something you say as you, like, push your child down a well. Yeah.
Marcus Parks 3:49
Now to keep the timeline straight in your head, we're rewinding the story all the way back to the days just after the Batavia shipwrecked, long before Euronymous took over and began ordering the murders of over a hundred people. This is the journey to Java, made by the rescue vessel that was supposed to return to the islands with help. So the longboat that sat on the Batavia's deck prior to the ship sinking was a 30-foot long craft with 10 oars and a single mast. Very much the sort of ship you'd expect to see being piloted by a few dozen Vikings. Eddie, you were correct. Hell yeah.
Unknown Speaker 3 4:23
Yeah, we went to the British Museum. You remember they had the entire Viking ship that they had excavated and they had all that kind of cool stuff in there. We learn on vacation.

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