Episode 674: Florida Files - Tales from Florida's Female Prisons
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast. On the left.
That's when the cannibalism started.
Who's that? Dude, I literally went home and that inspired me. I got a room on the Jersey Shore for one night on Saturday. That's great.
So what's in my head is putting two songs, like it starts with Shore House and then ends with, but I got a lot of money cause I just got paid.
I hate that shit.
It drives me crazy. It's like these two songs are fucking mashed together and my fucking brain doesn't know what to do with it. It's a mashup. What is that? That's not a mashup. That's a mashup. That's kind of a, that's kind of a mashup.
Got him again. I got him back into this. I pulled him back down into this shit. How many is a few?
We can't start with this. Couple, few, several, many. Two, three, four, five. We can't do this. What's some? Some is like six to nine. Okay.
I thought a handful is what happens when you... I'm not going to do this, Eddie. I can't even... I don't know how to joke today. Okay? This is a very serious topic. I do think it's interesting.
A handful is definitively five.
Because it's five fingers. Yes.
That's how I also say it.
Several is seven.
Yeah, unless you're talking about a child, and that means that child is awful. Yeah. He's a handful. He's a handful. He's a handful. That means I'm going to have a bad weekend. Because I'm hanging out with a five-year-old. Who's a handful? Welcome to the last podcast of the last, ladies and gentlemen.
Disgusting. I never want to say a boy's a handful. Oh, that boy's a handful. I'm two hands full. Henry Zebrowski. Yeah, that's right. I got just the tantalizing amount of tits that if you grabbed me in the dark, you'd think I'm the sexiest lady in prison.
And I'm a palm on the chest Marcus Parks. There's nothing to grab onto here. And we've got, I mean, I would say maybe a length. Yeah. Ed Larson.
Yeah, I'm a solid B. I'm a low B. You don't have tits. They're there. I got a big chest. You have a wide chest.
You have a manly chest. I feel like we have the same size chest. Yes. Except my tits are small. I just got my mother's breasts.
Yeah.
I'm shaped like an Italian sex pot.
Yeah. Yeah. That was the joke that I have for you in my roast is that, you know, everyone says that Ed Larson's fat, but I think he's more barrel chested. But unfortunately, that barrel is filled with disgusting fat. Yeah.
That's what I knew you were a good joke writer.
Thank you.
Thank you very much. And today we actually have Ed Larson at the helm. I just did the Gary Ridgway series. We did a three-parter. So I'm handing the reins over to Eddie Larson today.
Oh, boy. You know, nothing but a bunch of yucks today.
When I call you Eddie Larson, it really makes you sound like a criminal. It is. Thank you.
Yeah.
Yeah, rambling Eddie Larson.
Well, you know, there might be a couple of confessions today.
All right. So let's get into some. God damn it. What are you going to do? I don't even want to.
It's hard. Yeah. That's funny because like that is exactly why I picked the topic. I thought it would be fun. Women in chains, you know, behind bars, you know. Yeah, exactly. It's like, oh, that's fun. That's silly. And then it turns out when you really look into it, it's super sad.
Yeah. yeah yeah yeah i just got that what's a reform school girls movie with wendy o williams because that's what wendy's named after our dog we named her after wendy o williams and so i started watching that and i was just like i don't know if that movie really has a lot to do with what we're going to talk about today because that involved a lot of wet women beating each other a lot of spanking a lot of like gripping and then it was like a big man saying get the And then they'd go like, you got it, Mr. Walden.
You know, if you really examine it, it's really not that far off. It's just not fun.
I wonder, are there any particularly fun prison movies? I mean, back in the day. Jailhouse Rock. Jailhouse Rock. Okay, but that's a jail movie. That's not a prison.
And I think it's just a music video. Oh, is it? I think it is. Oh, wow. I don't know.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:01–14:10
2
Why did Ed choose to investigate Florida’s women’s prisons and what personal experiences shaped the episode?
14:10–48:06
3
What was the 2006 FCI Tallahassee scandal and how did guards run a sex-for-contraband scheme?
48:06–50:28
4
Which Tallahassee guards were implicated and what were the legal outcomes and sentences?
50:28–57:56
5
How did the June 21, 2006 arrest at Tallahassee turn into a deadly shootout?
57:56–1:23:46