Episode 676: My Lai Massacre Part I - Ho Money Ho Problems

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Last Podcast On The Left 1h 54m 3 speakers 7 chapters transcribed 1 month ago
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What is the opening banter and premise for the My Lai Massacre series?

Unknown 0:02
There's no place to escape to this is the last on the left. That's when the cannibalism started.
Henry Zebrowski 0:21
Alright, let us know when we're ready. Not Actually can you put some just gunfire up there for us? Yeah, just so I can be good so I can feel comfortable. Yeah, do you have any burning children? We'll wait till we get let's wait.
Marcus Parks 0:37
Just if you have constant firefights uh over and over again, that would be great.
Henry Zebrowski 0:41
I I in honor of our episode today, I I didn't masturbate this morning. I looked at my hand and I said, Nay, Palm and I didn't do it. Stupid And I I just didn't
Marcus Parks 0:53
Yeah. And that is what you can come to expect. That height of intelligence. You can come to expect that throughout the rest of this series. Oh very. I promise.
Unknown 1:04
Saigon. Shit. How am I still in Saigon?
Corey (Parks) 1:12
God damn! Charlie's everywhere, man! CHAPTER CHUT THE
Henry Zebrowski 1:21
It's not as great as we're not on YouTube and I can just start the episode with a bunch of fucks and it doesn't matter. Yeah, you really can. It's fantastic.
Unknown 1:27
I saw her little peeper sticking out of the elephant grass and I knew I was in Vietnam.
Marcus Parks 1:33
Welcome to the last podcast on the left, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Marcus Parks. I'm here with Saigon Henry Zabrowski.
Henry Zebrowski 1:40
Yeah, I'm gonna try it. Guys, you ready? I it's time finally to receive my brand new accent. I um let's just say the last two weeks have really been spent that every single time my eyeballs are closed, all I I like just hear just Why? Togan! And you know what? Uh I'm getting numbed to it.
Corey (Parks) 2:09
Yeah. Yeah.
Henry Zebrowski 2:09
It's kinda fun. It's what happens. It's just kinda fun to just be places like getting your like, you know, prescription medication. The whole time I'm like staring at the woman, I'm not hearing her, she's going like And all I'm hearing is
Marcus Parks 2:25
And of course we also have Hanoi, Ed Larson. How you doing?
Henry Zebrowski 2:28
And I am Hanoying God, you would be the height of humor. Height of humor. You would be such a disgusting lady boy. Oh my God. You as the Madahari, you as a fake Vietnamese.
Unknown 2:47
Hey there, fellas, how you doing? I'm a little boy. Come on in and have sex with me.
Marcus Parks 2:52
Wait a second, you're a chong duck. That's correct. I could see you as being like the most the the most popular guy at the Hanoi Hilton.
Henry Zebrowski 3:00
Oh my god. I would be a great mater D over there. Yeah, honestly. I just I just be like, have you rec do you have any local restaurants you recommend or any place I could possibly go to? Oh my god. I've d b my preparation has just been I've been slathering my insides with Bom E sandwiches. Thank you. And you know, because I'm trying to find the brighter side of this whole thing. And it's the Bom E sandwich.
Marcus Parks 3:20
That's really the only one.
Henry Zebrowski 3:21
And Rune Pear in Los Angeles. Well, that's Thai food.
Marcus Parks 3:24
Mm.
Henry Zebrowski 3:27
Winter's close.
Marcus Parks 3:28
Thailand's right there. Yeah, wow. The reason why we're talking about all this is because today starts a four-week long journey into the bowels of the Vietnam War with a focus on the Mi Lai Massacre.
Unknown 3:43
Sag on
Henry Zebrowski 3:45
Shit.
Unknown 3:47
How long have I been here?
Henry Zebrowski 3:51
Apparently it's not like the movies. Yeah.
Unknown 3:53
No.
Henry Zebrowski 3:54
You know, when you talk about Saigon it really helps when you take a sip out of your iced coffee right after This is my war.
Marcus Parks 4:05
If only they had Cold Brew. So on the morning of March 16, 1968, as the war in Vietnam continued to climb towards a bloody and savage apex, a force of about 100 American GIs stormed a village in South Vietnam, expecting to fight one of the most dangerous North Vietnamese battalions in existence. Instead, these army soldiers found Vietnamese civilians, women, children, and old men, cooking breakfast in anticipation of the work day to come. It was simply another rural village trying to survive in the midst of a conflict that had been dragging on in one form or another for almost twenty-five years, first with the French and now with the Americans. But unlike so many other villages that were burned down throughout the Vietnam War in countless search and destroy missions, history would remember this one more than any of the others, because this one would be the site of the world.
Marcus Parks 4:57
Of the Mi Lai massacre. See while the Americans had every opportunity to halt their offensive that day, they still attacked these civilians with all the bloodthirst and brutality that should have been reserved for their enemy, the dreaded North Vietnamese force known as the Viet Cong.

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