Side Stories: Joey Chestnut vs. The World
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What is the show format and who are the hosts introducing Side Stories?
There's no place to escape to. This is the Lost Podcast. On the left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started.
Side stories.
Yes. Get my D-H.
Getting your D-H. Get my D-H. D-H, D-H-L? Alternate packing service? Nah, dude. I'm just excited about my future as a messiah. I have stigmata. You got stigmata? Oh, yes. I have stigmata. You're so... I mean...
Christ's revenge. I don't want to call you stupid.
I have a stigma. I guess it's ridiculous. Unnecessarily masculine? Yeah, exactly. That's what it is. Thank you. Which I think translates as stigma. No, I fucking, dude. I lift so hard the other day. I lifted 245 pounds for the first time I've ever done that. And I fucking ripped my hands open doing it. But it was a deadlift. Yeah. It wasn't like a bench press. I'm not there yet. Yeah. Deadlifts. I'm getting there. 245. That's big for me. That's fine. Look at me. You do nothing. You do absolutely nothing. You eat berries. I do. I love my berries. I'm thick now. I have benched 300 pounds. I'll get there. Yeah. I am going to get there. I was 19, though. Yeah, but all these kids, I see them all doing it even in the gym now. The kids come over.
They all smell. They're all fucking garbage. All they do is sit there. All they do is Nazi salutes to each other.
They love it.
And say skibbity over and over again. Yeah. And then they just go and they, but yeah, they can lift tremendous weight because they don't have feelings yet. Yeah, no, no. I remember I was, I cheated though. I let it, I bounced it a little bit. And also you, yeah, you weren't doing, I do shit slow. Yeah, I bet. I do shit real slow. Everything. But it makes me strong. Oh, is that what it is? Stick much. Is that why you're in the bathroom so long? I'm touched by Christ. I'm in the bathroom because that's how I think. Welcome to Side Stories. I'm sitting here with non-thinker Ed Larson, I guess. What? Exactly. You all know. You all know me. All right. If we're in the toilet for a super long time, it's because life's complicated.
Yeah. Or I'm playing my fruit game. Exactly. Which is taking a shit full of fruit. You and ice fruit. Between the berry consumption that you got yourself up to and the berry consumption that I'm up to, my shit's at grizzly level. Oh, do you know what I learned recently? And I don't even know what to do with this because I don't think I can handle this, is that you're supposed to be freezing the blueberries. I buy them frozen. I told you, bro. You buy them frozen? Yeah, you moron. Apparently, they release more antioxidants when they're frozen. Stigmata. God damn it. You can't be better at life than me. Stigmata. Just a little bit. And I, new Christ, Henry Zebrowski. Yes. It feels good to be the new Christ. I hope they don't kill me like the last one.
Well, you know, at least it'd be fun. Yeah, I won't go to Italy. You get to come back for a couple days. It didn't kill him in Italy. It was the Italians who did it, but it wasn't in Italy. Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah. It was far away. Yeah, so they're right. You get to Italy and you make a right. He couldn't walk to Italy. The ankle support wasn't good enough. Yeah, what a fucking bitch. fucking bitch. That's what I'm saying. Jesus Christ couldn't fucking, they could keep you on the cross. That's what I'm gonna say, dude. You can't keep me on the cross. I'm Teflon. Shout out to Rob, always throwing up what we're talking about on the screen so we can see it. He threw up a picture of Jesus. Thank you. Yeah, just so we knew that it was Jesus.
And you know what I love about this, Jesus? I'm trying to inspire you guys.
I do appreciate white Christ.
I love ginger. Thank you for making it a white Christ. Ginger Christ. Eddie Sheeran Christ is my favorite Christ. Because that's the one the most, because you know how well he would have stood the temperatures of the desert. But we have some updates. First of all, there was a lie that was issued, a clip of Joey Chestnut choking out a guy, a protester. That was from 2022. It went viral. We were super excited about it because, honestly, we here at Last Podcast on the Left are Joey Chestnut stans.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the show format and who are the hosts introducing Side Stories?
0:01–8:27
2
What happened in the Joey Chestnut viral arrest clip and bodycam explanation?
8:27–11:08
3
How did hosts react to Joey Chestnut’s win, legal issues, and public image?
11:08–33:03
4
What were the details of the Ohio case where 16 children were rescued?
33:03–1:09:34
5
How did the hosts describe the Arizona toddler found alive in the morgue?
1:09:34–1:12:40