Chapter 1: What proud moment does Lu share about her dog Crumble?
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Be warned, it's Luanna. And this podcast contains honest, upfront opinions, rants, pants and general explicit content. But you know you love it. It's a no from me, but I'm never here to kink shame. This has excited me beyond belief. Lu for MP, Anna for MBE. It's so pink. Oi, guys, there's a guy down there that can deep throat a sausage. That's love. That is love. Good morning, everybody.
Chapter 2: What surreal experience did Anna have at The King’s Trust Awards?
Oh my goodness, we're towards the end of May already. Isn't that crazy? We are like, it's nearly Christmas. Basically Christmas now. Basically Christmas, guys. Yeah, happy Christmas. Another bank holiday today. It's another bank holiday. Nobody ever works in this country. How many bank holidays are there? Not enough. Too many.
Chapter 3: What listener chaos story involves a frankfurter?
That's the difference from an employee, an employer.
Yeah. Well, we have a lot at the beginning of the year. Is that six on there?
There's one in September as well, isn't there?
There's one at the end of August and then there's nothing until Christmas.
Yeah, but at Christmas there's a lot, no?
There's, I think you get Christmas Day, Boxing Day and then New Year's.
Can I just say, and I'm going to... And that's a new year's day. Oh, yeah. And I know there's going to be anyone that... The bugbear about bank holidays in particular is if you have kids in daycare nursery, right, not even just school, right, because school is like obviously free unless you're going to private schools.
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Chapter 4: What bizarre allegation is made about Fergie and P Diddy?
But when you're paying for daycare nursery, and I fell into this trap, if you have a month... I used to put Elle in on a Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Yeah. And they still charge you for bank holidays. And so if you are a Monday, Wednesday, Friday... No. So we got stitched up for bank holiday Mondays, good Fridays. Yeah, all of that.
So I know so many people can relate to this that go, it's such a stitch up.
If they charge you, they should work.
It's a great question, Lou. It's a great suggestion.
Well, they shouldn't charge you because they're not working.
With doggy daycare, we pay for it. But if it falls on a bank holiday, they'll give us a credit day.
Oh, really? And now, correct me if I'm wrong, because I might be spreading some fake news. I've recently seen it possibly even on our Facebook page, actually, as well. And actually, I'd like to know, anyone that runs a nursery or nursery workers... Does this still exist or have we all been brought back up to 2026 and there is some sort of pro rata compo on that?
Because that's really unfortunate because I used to lose out on six days and that's a lot of money when you're spending 70 quid a day on daycare or whatever it is. I think it's more than that now.
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Chapter 5: What is ball maxxing and why is it controversial?
Well, depending where you live in the country. Yeah. I mean, it's obviously more expensive in the South. Yeah. Well, there you go. But there you go. Well, happy bank holiday. Hope you're having a lovely one. This, of course, is Luana. Please make sure, guys, that you are following our podcast on your favourite podcast platform. If you're not following, please do it right now.
Just click on the top right hand and subscribe on YouTube. Hello, YouTube. Hello. So how are we guys? The sun is shining. The sun is shining. What is everybody, how is everyone? What's everyone been up to? Lou, what have you been up to?
Well, Crumble, do you remember years ago when I got Rebel and Rhubarb and then I had that dog trainer? It's ringing a bell. And then I talked about him on the pod.
Side note, where's your jumper from? Oh, I think it's... I really like it. I don't know. It's like perfect for me. It says love, love, love on it. You can have it. That's a very good relationship cage jumper.
I just got this out because I was cold actually. That's nice.
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Chapter 6: Who is crowned Weirdo of the Month and why?
It's from like somewhere cheap. Is it? Yeah, for sure. I like it. Anyway, sorry, dogs. Yes. Anyway, I've now found a really good dog trainer. I'm going to shout him out. Paul Haydock, dog training. Paul the dog trainer. Yeah, and he is like really good. What? You're laughing because of earlier on. Your dog trainer's really good. Basically... Crumble has graduated.
He said to me that I am one of the best owners he's ever come across. You're very committed. Yeah, and he said to me that Crumble is one of the best behaved, intelligent dogs ever. That he's ever come across. Of his breed or all breeds? All breeds, because you know he's poodle. That is the second most intelligent dog. And Crumble does a lot of things. Like we've practiced recall.
We've practiced placing and staying on a certain point. I taught him how to paw now. I've taught him rollover. Paw and rollover took me quite a long time, but we've finally cracked it. He spins. He high fives. Like, he sits.
Chapter 7: What advice do the hosts give regarding personal relationships?
He lays down.
He's just a cleverist. Does he respond to command? High five. Yeah, and he's like... What about ducks? Yeah, well, he's actually quite good round the ducks if he's on a lead.
So the reason why Bex and I take it a piss, right, is because Crumble is a very good dog. He's so good.
And the dog trainer I've graduated, he got a medal.
He got like a medal for... With a homemade cookie from Paul. Oh, good boy. And he's been so complimentary. Do you know what? Crumble is the most adorable little dog. But why are we laughing? Because we turned up this morning at Chatterley's too. Lou started by going, oh my God, guess what? Crumble has just graduated. Like, he's such an amazing dog. She showed us the tricks.
Yep, she's showing the tricks now.
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Chapter 8: What are the key takeaways about trends in body modification?
If you're watching on YouTube, you can see these excellent tricks. But then what happened? We were outside filming some content and all of Lou's ducks rocked up. Well, Crumble legged it and was beetling around these ducks. Like a sheepdog. He's very fast. As my grandmother would say, oh, he's worrying the ducks. He's worrying the ducks. He was legging it. Lou was shrieking like a banshee. Krabby!
Krabby!
Yeah, I know. You're looking at me now, aren't you, dog? This dog gave zero shits about its mother at this point. No, sometimes his listening ears aren't switched on. Well. Because he was very excited about the tux. Well, Q Lou running around the garden like a blue-arsed fly trying to collect crumble again. So I'd say he was marked down on that. But to be fair, now he is performing well.
I just, you know, he's just a toddler. He's only seven months. And he's best trained. Does Norman do all these tricks? Norm does sit.
He does down. He does paw. He does a high five. Look how proud you are. Justifiably so. Does he spin? Occasionally. Roll over? No, because he gets stuck and then just rolls back. Yeah, he's not great at the overall level.
Good, Paul. We love our pet. I mean, I don't have a dog, but I have a cat who's like a dog. Well, well done, Crumble. You slightly disgraced yourself with the ducks, but overall, congratulations. Well done, Crumby. Well, speaking of medals, I feel like girls. I feel like I might be... You know how the other week you wanted to be an MP?
I didn't go anywhere.
You only had a few days.
The thing on that, I realised after the fact that they weren't electing MPs, they were electing councillors. So the MPs is still on for the Jenny Lex next one. Jenny Lex, Lou for the MP.
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